Let me start off by saying i have always been a stay home mother

Question

I have three children one is not in school. All of that was ok until my husband lost his nice paying job. Even then he said no i dont want you to work.Now he may face a chance of going to jail because of back child support. not because he is just a dead beat but because he lost his job.

If he has to go to jail my parents have offered for me to live with them. I do not want to but.....with three kids it might be something i have to do. He is upset that i might live with them.

He is saying if you live with them you will not work. I need you to work so that we will have money when i get out.

I said ok i will work at a daycare so our child can go and he said no i need you to get a job for your degree.

what is it to him? He will be away?

Answer 1

You should do what you're comfortable with. How long have you been staying at home now?

You're a mother, you will do what is necessary to get s*** done. I've been there. Don't let anyone or anything stand in your way, because it is the children that's important. Even if it means going against his wishes, when he does get out (usually no more than 90 days for child support fyi) he'll realize he was wrong and that you could hold it down. It has nothing to do with going against your husband, just going with what you feel is right as a mother. Good luck babe, and take all the help that is offered. Don't let yourself get overwhelmed cause the babies recognize stress and feel it just as badly as you.

Added:

Sounds like he needs some enlightening. There's no WAY you can make that kind of money with no experience!! Tell him that unless he wants you to start dancing at the tittie bars, you'll have to sacrifice the house. Yeah it sucks, but he'll have his court stuff straightened out, and he'll know that you can be there for him. He probably feels like his manhood just got taken away because he's always been the sole provider. He'll understand later, and recognize all of your efforts. Don't think that you trying isn't helping. It will.

Answer 2

Did you not say he was your HUSBAND.  I would be upset with you too.  If he needs you to work then you need to work.  Being a team is what marriage is all about.  

And as for you living with your parents that is really stupid what will he come home to...  Or do you really care.  Is you relationship actually about the money he made or love...

Answer 3

Why has he not contacted the court for reduced payments? I would start looking for a job now and then your parents could have time with their grandchildren while you work the job you can get. The job market is tough right now. Even if he dose not go to jail you will have to work at least part-time

Answer 4

Your husband needs to put his priorities first. Yes, if you have to move in with your parents, then you need to do that. He has to either accept it, or do something about it. It will be a challenge for you to keep the house, but that's NOT your fault.

My husband has been in prison and I had to do what I could to help provide a place for him to live when he got home. How you get it done, as long as it's not illegal, it doesn't concern him.