Letting kids play together...

Question

When your family all gets together, do you let the kids all run around and play together or are the moms all expected to stay right there with their kid(s) the whole time?

I ask because I've heard that whenever my son is off playing with the other kids, my husbands cousins will say something like, "Where is his mom" or "If they were going to bring him, they should be watching him". And this is when he's doing NOTHING wrong, just playing. (and it's not like I just leave him for a long time, it would be like long enough to go inside and make a bottle.. ) It really hurts my feelings because I felt like he was ok playing with the other kids, but now I feel like no one wants him around and he's only 2. He's very well behaved, so I don't know where this even comes from..

Answer 1

Parent your child.  Watch him like a hawk.  Sorry, I agree with the cousin's husband.  2 year olds need individual supervision.  

If you want to let him play with a group and you want to go into the house or something, I'd highly suggest you just ask another parent if they mind keeping an eye on your son for 10 minutes while you run inside.  It's possible the other parents might think you're being rude and assumptive.

Answer 2

Is this the same kid who pinches and pushes, who your in-laws call "mean"??

I think it's pretty clear that your husbands family has a problem with your child and your parenting. Either he misbehaves, or they are just jerks. If you watch him frequently and KNOW he does not have bad behavior, then I'd have a serious talk with your husband's family, or make your husband do it.

2 is a little young to leave for more than a minute or so, I think. Maybe all the moms could rotate and take shifts watching the kids??  

Answer 3

Speak up when you overhear comments like this. Just politely say, "excuse me, I am keeping an eye on him, he is being well behaved and playing with his cousins. If you have an issue with that, or see something I dont, please address me directly." At all the family gatherings we had all us kids were expected to go off and play. Same with the children now, and everyone just keeps an eye and helps to watch each others kids, but we let them have fun and the adults get to visit as well. It seems that cousin is being a bit ridiculous.  

Answer 4

As long as you are keeping an eye on him, and he is playing in a safe area, they have no reason to gripe, so just ignore them.  Whoever is telling you this stuff, tell them not to bother unless they have something positive to say to you.  Spreading gossip is just hurtful, and serves no purpose.  Stay strong, it sounds like you are a great mom.

Answer 5

my kids are a little older but as long as you know they are in a safe environment let him go also older kids can keep an eye on him besides we are only human and can't keep our eyes on them all the time

Answer 6

I let mine run and play with the kids and check on them every 5 minutes...I see no reason to be stalking them.....they need a break to have fun as well. You need to just tell these people off and tell them that if they have a problem, they need to address it to YOU or shut the h**l up!

Answer 7

On the flip side of this, I was just at a family reunion at which one of my relatives let their kids run wild.  While the mom was off talking, the kids were playing in the road, tormenting the other kids, breaking things in the house, swiping frosting off the cake, etc.  Your son is two, he's not old enough to be with a huge group of kids without someone watching them.  I'd be annoyed too if I was one of your husband's cousins and having to do your job.  If you have to go make a bottle, pick up your son and take him with you - it's not the big of a hassle.

Answer 8

Wow - your husband's family is really tough. When my family gets together the kids all run around and play together and everyone watches out for everyone's kids.