Question:

Life in a box: poetry critique?

by  |  earlier

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I live in a box

made of glass,

peering outside

as people pass.

In my head,

I'm only me.

I'm not afraid

of what they see.

Yet, I grow tired

of the role that I play.

I act my part,

living each day.

They think they know

the me that I hide

but no one really sees

what I never confide

Someday, I'll break out

with the glass at my feet.

I'll stand in the sun

broken and complete.

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2 ANSWERS


  1. The poem get your point across well and is easy to follow. I think it's a little too simple - I'd like to see more variation in word choice. What I mean is that you are telling us and not showing us.

    It's not a bad poem. Keep writing.  


  2. This is a great poem. I'm so surprised no one has commented on it already....I'm sure many people feel like this sometimes and can relate to your description and expression. Your use of imagery is awesome and I especially like how you tire of being the same with no one really understanding the real you yet you will muster the courage to break from your shell and take everyone by surprise..it's a lovely poem..I enjoyed reading it very much

    Thanks!

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