Lisa got mad at me because I left the toilet seat up on accident.
The only reason why I forgot to put the seat down was because I heard Lisa jingling her keys outside the front door trying to come in and she said if I'm home and I hear those keys jingling I better drop what I'm doing and bolt to the door and let her in or else I get the "pleasure" of having her stinky feet in the face!
Lisa is a Karate, Judo, and Jujitsu expert and I'm not a fighter at all and can't resist her technique. It's too solid. She likes to Judo flip me and then put her bare feet in my face when they're dirty and force me to worship them. I have to tell her how pretty her toes are, how she has the highest arches ever, and how her feet smell "good". She says it's the greatest form of "submission" when I'm under her feet.
I hate it, but I love her and I don't want to leave her. Anyways, she said I can't leave her cuz she won't let me leave. She is crazy and has a terrible temper. She constantly roundhouse kicks me in the face and tosses me around with her Judo take-downs. She also loves to put me in Jujitsu choke holds until I almost pass out. I'm afraid of her and her Alpha Female attitude.
All because I forgot to put the seat down on the toilet because I had to get to the door before she used her keys to come it and give me a serious beating.
Please advise.
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