Long, but i need help with my family! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE HELP!

Question

Ok, so i want to be on-line schooled for about 3 months until i move, because my school is horrible and i don't fit in, and i'm not rich, so obviously no one likes me. But my dad is freaking out about it! I understand that it is a big step for him, and i am trying to be as lenient as i can with him, but he is making it hard when all he does is yell at me! He took me out to Subway today to talk to me about it and explain, but when i tried to explain my side he kept cutting me off! I started crying a little (he doesnt lik etears, which is my fault because i knew that, but i couldnt stop crying because i was so upset, so the crying is my fault), which made things worse. Then when we left and got in the car, he started yelling (ha and spitting, he spits when he yells that loud lol) at the top of his lungs at me and getting all ticked off. My parents are not married, but they have me, and my dad told me he was gonna take my mom to court over this and fight her against it! My mom has sole-custody of me, so she decides either way, but everyone is making me feel bad! My mom isnt scared of my dad, but i feel bad that she has to hire a lawyer to fight my dad! She told me she doesnt care and that my dad has been like this since she met him. But then i feel bad for making my dad yell at me like that. And i feel bad for my mom because my dad brought up the fact that i have moved 10 times in 14 years (which is how old i am). My mom wants me to see a counselor about my dad's moods and how i can deal with them the right way, cause apparently its not healthy to go from beong happy to as sad as he made me today. I have never EVER been that upset in my life. All of this on top of my mom gettting married next month. I am falling apart here! Any help and advice for me? Should i let her take me to a counselor? How can i stop this??? I need help! Please! I don't know what to do anymore, because no one is listening to me! I don't want anyone to hate me because my parents are fighting this bad! My dad's side of the family has a tenacy to "dis-own" the people they are mad at til they get over being mad at them. I dont want my very own family to hate me! Please please PLEASE help me!

Answer 1

When you can't change others actions or behaviors it is good to get counselor to sort things out and figure out what you can do for yourself to deal with it. It can also help translate your feelings through the counselor to your parents.

Answer 2

you need a counsellor, trust me it feels better,

Answer 3

Your mom is trying to better the situation. Getting married and moving to a better neighborhood should help you a lot because you will experience greater stability for the next 5 years until you are 18. I truly hope that is so.

Blow off your dad... he is trying to control things from a distance. At 14 you can legally decide who you want to stay with or visit with. You can determine your own visitation... consider that... the judge will hear you! Your dad sounds like he is abusive, so I think the judge will let you off the hook. Sounds like you need to ignore your dad's side of the family.

It is only 3 months. Keep yourself occupied and just do the job at hand. It really will go by faster than you think. Don't worry about the current school or its denizens... they are already in your rear-view mirror, so adopt that attitude with confidence.

Do your best to bond with the step-father, show respect and do the basics of picking up after yourself and helping out around the house.