Long distance relationship issues :(?

Question

I am a 22 year old female who is dating a 22 year old male. We live a thousand miles apart, because he is in the army. He just got relocated to a new base, and is now going to the bar 1-3 times a week, and playing poker with his friends almost every other night he's not at the bar. Tonight is his 3rd night at the bar, and I let him know it bothers me that he is going out so much, and that I think it is excessive. He told me that he can't understand why I'm upset and he got mad that I'm trying to make him stop hanging out with his new friends. I just think that bars are ok to go to every once in a while...I definitely go out with my girlfriends when I can. He tells me that there is NOTHING else to do there. I have a hard time believing that EVERYONE who is not working on base is at this bar. There is always something else to do, right? He's admitted to having drinking problems in the past...especially when he was stationed in Germany. He tells me he is not there to get drunk. He just wants to hang out with his friends and play pool. I don't know what to do about it. It's the most frustrating that he refuses to even try to see it from my point of view.

Answer 1

Never stand between a man and his beer! He's a soldier, all they DO is fight and drink!  Just talk to him !

Answer 2

If you keep on at him you will start to lose him as he will get annoyed by you... Just let him enjoy his life why he can because if he is in the army he may never see any of his 'new friends' again.

Answer 3

There really isnt anything to do there except go to the bar or stay at home and do nothing. My bf is in the airforce so i understand where youre coming from. Maybe try apologizing for trying to "control him" and explain that you are just worried about him because you care sooo much about him. Tell him that you believe that he is just there to hang with his friends. The key is to explain yourself while apologizing, so they will listen. No guy will ignore a girl when shes admitting that he was right(its a power trip thing). That way he gets his apology but also begins to see where youre coming from too.

Answer 4

let him live his life he has the right to u need to trust him besides its his life n ur relationship is doomed