I am looking for my mother, who left when I was a baby. I don't know much at all about her. There was some big scandal surrounding my birth (don't really know what it was) and no one would ever talk about it. I was told that her name is Lora, but don't know for sure if that's the truth. I guess she would be in her 60's now. Supposedly she met Bud in the Carolinas and I was born somewhere in that area.
I understand that she may not want me in her life, or want any sort of relationship with me. After all this time with no contact, that isn't hard to figure out. I'm not looking to confront her, I'm not looking for money, I'm not looking to "out" her for having me out of wedlock or whatever the reason is for all the secrecy. Whatever the scandal was, it doesn't matter to me. I've thought about it many, many times and considered all sorts of wild scenarios, so whatever it was won't shock me or ruin my life. I understand that my mother probably went on to have a family and they may not know anything about me. I'm not looking to go knocking on doors and introducing myself.
I don't know what else I can say to convince her to come out of hiding, or to convince someone else who might know something to come forward. Just that I desperately need some record of my birth. No certificate was ever filed and it's getting increasingly hard to live without one. I won't be able to renew my driver's license when it expires. I can't get a passport. I won't be able to have a state-issued photo ID at all. Can you imagine what that will do to my life in this day and age? Until now, I'd been able to get by with old school records and letters from the state saying no birth record was filed, but since 9/11, all that's changed.
Aside from the practical concerns with the records, it would really be nice to know I didn't just fall out of the sky or a test tube. Not knowing anything about who you really are and where you came from eats at you constantly. I look at strangers in the street and think, for all I know, that could be my mother. I meet people who look similar to me and think, that could be my half-sibling. It's a constant source of questions and it would be nice to have at least one answer. Especially since I don't even know for sure that the man who raised me is my biological father. For all I know, I just got left with him.
I'm hoping my mother mentioned him to *someone* and they'll remember, even if she never sees this herself. I've never met anyone else in a similar situation and I don't know what else to do. I've tried every sort of search, sent for every sort of record, begged and pleaded with the family I do know to tell me the truth. Nothing has worked. I'm at the end of my rope and I desperately need some answers.
If anyone out there knows anything, please help.
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