Looking for biological parents from a closed adoption..Help!!?

Question

My boyfriend is adopted, and just recently figured out where he was born. He really wants to know who is biological parents are, but it was a closed adoption so we have no names or locations. What are my options to find his parents?

Answer 1

Join http://www.isrr.net

Then go here to find out the state laws and any free help in that state I've found: http://adopteerights.net/nulliusfilius/?...

I'd start by getting his non id.

That will give you some direction to go in.

Send him to http://www.adultadoptees.org if he needs search help.

Answer 2

Are his parents willing to give him a copy of the adoption papers?  

Does he know where to find them to take them?

Often people are affraid to ask their adoptive parents for info in fear of hurting or disrespecting them.

Many adoptive parents have mellowed with age and understand the need for their adult adoptive children to know more about their birth.  Don't be affraid to ask.

My adoptive mother gave me more clues than I expected.

In my case, my birth name was on the adoption certificate.  My Adoptive mother remembered the attorney telling her that my BM's name was in my name.  That was the clue that a skip tracer (yes I paid big $$$$) was able to use to find the BM in 1 week....after I spent years on my own trying.

I later discovered that I had contacted BM's x-husband 6 years earlier on my own and families keep secrets.

Can he talk to his relatives, old family friends anyone willing to "gossip" & spill.



Every fragment is a clue.  Get him to try to remember and list any clues that his parents might have said.

Example:  My adoptive father used to tell me that I would be a good decorator, attorney or do well in the military.  BM, BGrand Father & BF's careers.

Go on line and sign up with all registries...research like crazy and take notes.

Answer 3

He can list his birthplace and birth date at various registries.  If his first parents are looking for him, they may eventually find that registry.  Knowing what hospital he was born at is very helpful, if that is available.

Answer 4

depends on what state.  you can always start with the state registry and issr.

Answer 5

you said he recently figured out where he was born...does he have the day and year...go to the hospital and start there..look in the local newspaper...if it comes down to it..there are adoption detectives that you can pay to find birth parents and siblings..thats what i did after twenty years of looking and i had my birth name..i just wasnt getting anywhere

Answer 6

He can't find anything out because it was a closed adoption and those records are sealed.

Answer 7

His birth certificate has a number on it. The agency that was used can give him "non identifying information" and that often has a clue.  I helped a friend find her birth name, which lead to her birth brother.  He sent pictures of his mother and they were identical to my friend.  She was however born in 1942, and these days it is much easier to locate biological parents.  Look up the email or the website for ALMA.  If his biological parents signed up there, and he signs up there, they will initiate a reunion.  You can email me at imanonni@yahoo and I might be able to help you more.