Paul liked me all of middle school. Paul is that funny guy with a weird sense of humor. He’s that guy that’ll pick on you, if he finds anything “gay†about you. Though, he’s a good person to and with me. I never really looked at him as more than a friend. He was just a buddy. Eighth grade came around and he got a girlfriend. It was a pretty serious relationship. He loved her. Summer before ninth grade, they did it. High school came around; he ended up in my first and last period class. His girlfriend broke up with him the middle of first semester. Reason being, he “followed her aroundâ€Â, too attached maybe? He was really hurt from that. I've always been that person that was there for him. He started smoking pot. And doing drugs from what I heard, but I'm not entirely sure? He was a little different from the old Paul I knew. He doesn’t have a good relationship with his dad, who’s an alcoholic. But I mean I don’t know if he knows this, but I’m in that same situation with my own dad, who’s also an alcoholic. He got in a fight at school and was expelled, had to go to ALC, a juvie type of school? When I found out, I was pretty disappointed, and I told him that. I was a good friend to him, and I think he saw that. I was his good influence. Finally he came back, and then started calling me more. He also began liking me again. And this time, I liked him back. He had asked me out and then it was official. I was comfortable with him; I really, truly liked him. I cared for him, I enjoyed being around him. During the time we were going out, I wasn't getting along with my mom too well. I was seriously thinking about moving. On the way to picking up Chinese food, I had talked to my step dad about how I felt, and how I wanted to live with my dad. He said I couldn’t. He wouldn’t allow it. He wouldn’t let me go just because of the fact that me and my mom weren’t getting along. This made me really mad. How can he stop me from seeing my dad? It wasn’t just because I wasn’t getting along with my mom, I really miss my old man, and I want to know who he is. I called Paul that same night because I wanted to hear his voice for comfort. When I called him, he knew something was wrong with the way I sounded. The thing is he thought I was going to break up with him? This threw me off. Of course I wasn't, I had never thought about that. Then he had to go. A night later, he thought I was going to break up with him again, and I told, "Of course not! No!" and then the most confusing thing happened. He told me we didn't talk as good as we use to? It wasn’t me, if I could’ve talked to him more, I would’ve. He was always busy. Basketball, his “friends.†He was one heck of a confusing guy. I asked him if he was breaking up with me, and surprisingly, he was. I didn't really have anything to say back, I wasn't hurt; the relationship hadn't even been that long. A couple weeks maybe? Plus, I'm a pretty mentally strong girl. My classes with him were a little weird after that. If he told me he missed me and to call him, I'd be like "why?" I mean why should I, right? I didn't act interested in him, yet I wasn't too mean to him. We were just friends, so that's it; I wasn't going to act otherwise. He ended up getting another girlfriend, and I don't know, that was even more confusing as you can imagine. They didn't last long, not even a week. He came back to me. Asked why I wasn't calling him. I just didn't feel like I should be, you know? I was okay. Didn't ever love the guy (as more than a friend), nor been heartbroken by him. I moved on, started talking to different boys, getting options. Sometimes in class, I could look in his eyes and tell he missed me. He'd text me during class, telling me he really liked me. I told him I didn't like him back. And he knew that. Also, I asked him why he really broke up with me. I told him how I thought he was really busy, and how it wasn’t my fault we didn’t talk. He told me he knew that, and that he was going to move. So that was his new reason for why he broke up with me. He didn’t want to “get too attached.†We hadn't hung out much, neither have we made out. And I kind of wanted to. I told him to hang out with me after school one day, and he did. We ended up making out, and stuff. The interesting thing is it felt pretty right. I just played cool though. I guess I kind of showed him what he could've had. And that was that. School year was over, summer came along, and he’d call sometimes. We'd talk. Then one night, he told me he had to tell me something. He made a huge deal about it. He ended up telling me he loved me. But the funny thing is, I was talking to another guy (just a friend), who had also told me he loved me not too long before. I kind of was expecting to hear it, especially since he was making a big deal out it. But for some reason, it didn't get to me. I told him I didn't know what to say. And he said he was sorry for telling me, that he shouldn’t have done that. But yeah, after that, he left to see
Tags: