Question:

Love of my life pregnant with another man's child.?

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Lemme try and give the complete picture.

We lived together in my aprtment for about two years before she left for california. We maintained a long distance relationship for a year and half half, and did our best to work things out. I'm 30, she's 36.

June 14 - She told me that we would be better off as friends, that the demands of her work made it difficult to maintain commitments. I thought it would be best to give her some space.

July 15 - She calls me in the middle of the night crying asking why I didnt call her for a month. Natually I told her that I was always just here wating for her call. Reassured that I was always there for her.

July 20 - Realized how much she meant to me, started to long for her so badly that I desperately tried to win her back.

July 24 - She persisted in telling me that we would be better of as friends. She tells me she still loves me deeply but was too busy with her work to give me any time.

July 27 - I persisted to win her back. Desperately still in love with her. We finally got to talk. I was so happy I could burs.I was madly longing for her. I was absolutely thirlled to hear her voice and was jsut about to propose.. In a matter of minutes I was reeling from heaven to h**l. She told me that there was something awefully wrong. That I would not want her back. She told me she was pregnant with another man's child. A freaking midget she shared the aprtment with whom she reassured me was harmless.I was crying for days. Tormented by my genuine longing and love for her.

She refuses to marry the midget, acknowleding that the pregnancy was a mistake. She refused to have an abortion due to her religous beliefs.

She tells me she still loves me, but it would be unfair for me to contnue our relationship. I told her that despite it all I loved her still. She refuses to leave the midget, reasoning that she needs someone to drive her around and help her with the preganancy.

I AM IN TERRIBLE ANGUISH at her betrayal. Realizing that we still both feel for each other makes it worse. Told her that I was praying that the pregnancy would self terminate, she said the same thing too but still refues to have an abortion.

I am still in denial. I AM A TOTAL WRECK. I still love her. I pity her for what she is about to face. I feel as if I died and lost haf my soul. I've never been hurt this bad before. She was my best friend, confidant, lover.

I am insanely jealous and outrage that she's still sahring that apartment with the midget (literally, biologically a dwarf) . I dont know what to do! Please give me some advice. It's either she's lying about it to push me away OR she really does love me but made a mistake.

I dont know if I can put up with the baby. It would be so much easier to turn around and walk away, but I genuinely love and care for her. What am I supposed to do?

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12 ANSWERS


  1. First i ask if you are a Christian and share the same beliefs as her. I think she may be even more upset that she had s*x before marrige. Also i have a slight feeling the midget is holding somthing against her. Id go visit her whereever she is. Dont worrie about the midget. Dont have anything against him. You need to find out what you need to find out. I think she is really mixed up. HSe needs you, youare her good friend go and help. Its the best you can do,


  2. Sounds like a miserable situation.  Two possible choices:  Take her back and go rent 'The notebook'.  Dump her on her head and go rent 'The Matrix'.  

      

  3. Follow your heart. :-)

  4. I will prey for you both in my sleep, god bless you and your wife, may god forgive your wife for her sins.. Amen! <33

  5. "I genuinely love and care for her."

    If that's true, then no obstacle is too great. If you perceive that there are obstacles, then you don't genuinely love her, you're just being a jealous, possessive idiot.

  6. well i understand her sometimes u luv that person a lot but u still do mistakes but then again u know if ur love is that big for the other person she wouldn't of thought bout it i know u want to take her back but that will only complicate things if she really loved you nothing would of happen my suggestions is turn away and forget as much as it hurts there has to be someone else who will appreciate you love sincerely Nicole Serenity.

  7. She broke it off because she was seeing someone else, not because of the demands of her job. Yeah she had demands, from another man.  If on the 14th she broke up with you and on the 27th she told you she was pregnant, obviously she was already seeing someone else. I know it hurts but it will be best if you just walk away. Don't cut her off completely. You can occasionaly speak, but as far as being in a relationship with her, forget it.  She has been lying to you all along. And dealing with her means dealing with her baby's father. Stay strong, good luck.

  8. If you love her, and are willing to be a father to that baby, please step up and let her know that. She's stuck in a very, very difficult position, and I know she is probably wanting to have a father for her child. Let her know you are responsible enough to handle this. You can't walk away without a fight, you really can't. That doesn't show you love her, and when she sees that happen, she may very well settle for the other man. Think about it. You're thirty, and I feel you are probably mature enough to handle fatherhood. Maybe if you stick around and raise this baby, you two can realize you can overcome anything. And who knows, maybe marriage and other kids will come along soon. Just please, don't give up yet. I know it's really hard for you, and it's a crappy situation, but that's life. And if you can get through this, it will not only bring you two closer together, but it will make you so much stronger. Good luck with this. I truly hope it works out for you.  

  9. I say be with her if you love her that much

    BUT 1--YOU HAVE TO LOVE THE CHILD NO MATTER WHAT (don't be angry with the child it's not it's fault)

    2--don't be mad at the other guy you don't even know him and

    3--we're all human and have needs and you were not with her at the time.

  10. She has a 25% chance that the baby with be a dwarf (lots medical problems with this genetic disorder).  

    I don't understand how you could want her back knowing someone has been in her.

    I also don't understand how a 36 year old woman could be so immature, or how on religious reasons she couldn't have an abortion.

    Tell you that you wish her the best but you really can't deal with the mess SHE made.  Move on. she has been playing you and out of your life for a long time.

  11. "A freaking midget she shared the apartment with..."

    Sorry, but LMFAO!!!

  12. Ask yourself, do you want a life of drama? My guess is no. Not to mention you just stated you would not be able to put up with the baby.

    If you loved her why after a year did you not go to cali? If she loved you and cared for you why did she come to Cali? I understand you needing to work, but if you have truly felt you have met your soul mate, you follow them. I think God put this situation in your life as a wake up call, pay attention she was not the right one for you, she wouldn't have gotten pregnant knowing that the person she loves is in another state and could come for her at any moment. Deep down I think she wanted children and you may not have been ready for that at 27 and her being 34 her clock was yelling at her..now that you are 30 I hope you have matured enough to know that you will get past this and that there is some one ready to love you in your own state and move at the same pace as you. Chin up son, you will miss the girl of your dreams if you keep your head down...Hmm I said that somewhere else before..LOL

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