Lovemaking vs Babymaking?

Question

We've been trying to conceive for a little over a year... how do we get back to enjoying our s*x lives instead of focusing so much on TTC? I don't want this to seem like an inappropriate question but it's hard to conceive when you feel like s*x is a chore. Any suggestions?

Answer 1

Give yourselves a holiday from baby making - agree to stop trying for 3 - 6 months.

Stop trying, stop counting days, stop planning s*x - its amazing what the body will do if your mind is relaxed.

If you do get pregnant during that 'holiday time' its a blessing.

If you don't get pregnant during that time then atleast you will be refreshed and ready to start trying again.

Best of luck.

Answer 2

If you're doing it, stop charting your ovulation, stop buying pregnancy tests, and stop anticipating your period. Do things together that you and your partner enjoy. Go for a romantic getaway, even if it's just to a hotel in town. Enjoy a bubble bath together, spend a Saturday in bed lounging around. There is also a thrill in having s*x places besides the bedroom. Just have fun. It doesn't have to be over the top romantic, as long as you two are enjoying the company.

Answer 3

My wife and I are trying to conceive as well but for us at least the babymaking aspect actually enhances our lovemaking. It's just great to be with each other and to know that we might be creating a new life together. It's an amazing feeling--it doesn't at all feel like going through the motions. I appreciate that if she didn't get pregnant after a while, it might become frustrating. I would suggest lots of foreplay and pillow talk (talk about making babies, getting pregnant...I often tell my wife how wonderful it will be to see her belly swell with our child...). Make sure your partner helps you o****m as that will increase your chances of conceiving.

Lots of luck to you both!

Answer 4

First, if it has been over a year then you should start seeing a RE. They may can help you get pregnant and locate any problems if there is any. I know how it feels to just go through the motions during lovemaking, it gets old fast!. I haven;t found a way yet to not let it be babymaking. I just make sure that we still make love on the times I am not fertile and that makes up for it a little at least. Good luck to you and I hipe you get your BFP very soon!

Answer 5

You have to just stop worrying about babymaking. spend time getting intimate with the foreplay. Have fun, joke around with each other. Remember to play!

Answer 6

Have you read "Conscious Conception" by Jeanine Parvati?  It has a lot of good info from a spiritual point of view on conception.  

How about adding some props?  Whipped cream, fudge sauce (link below to a fruit sweetened one if you are eating to conceive as well), body paints?

How about a weekend away, not timed to ovulation, but to your life/work schedule, just to be together and enjoy something you both love, whether it is a symphony or a hike or antiquing or sports?  Reconnect over some activity you enjoyed while courting.  At least for us women, it seems to be really important to have mental intercourse as much as physical.

The other benefit to the last suggestion is that after you have a baby, it will never be the same as far as enjoying these times with your husband as the focus of your life -at least not until the kids head to college.

Answer 7

For sure it gets boring when you have to do it. For conception start sexual intimacy during your period or directly after your period. Use the pre-ejaculate in your intimacy as it contains the most potent sperm. Have sexual intimacy every three or four days instead of every other day. Sperm have a life of five days. You can continue every three or four days throughout the month. Practice using your kegel pelvic muscles as it will help you to o****m during intimacy further increasing your chances of conception. Your partner does not have to ejaculate in order for you to become pregnant if you are using the pre-ejaculate during intimacy. Deep penetration positions also increase conception. Take some time off to regroup and relax and set a time to begin again in the future. In the meantime make sure you both increase your protein intake, all that practicing can wear you out physically. Best wishes, G

Answer 8

I feel the same way, it's like we only B/D to conceive it's so hard for me to get back into our normal s*x life!!!

Answer 9

I think instead of TRYING, you should just have fun with it. Try not to focus too much on the babymaking aspect and more on the love making

Goodluck and babydust to you!!