MY MOH is my sister and wants to throw me a shower?

Question

This is my LITTLE sister, so the fact that she's stepping up and making plans to throw me and my fiance a joint wedding shower makes me so happy and proud (she's 21 going on 14). My mom plans on helping, too.

Mostly our wedding party, family, close friends and some of our close family friends who I don't see very much since we live out of state, but were important people in my life growing up are attending. I know typically the bride's family isn't supposed to host the event because then it seems like we're fishing for gifts, but that's totally not the case. Will guest see it this way? I want nothing more than my sister to help plan this but I just don't want people to think we're being greedy. Thoughts?

Answer 1

It is typically one of  the maid of honor's duties and I'm sure your guests will see it that way.  Most people who will attend the shower will be your friends, co-workers and family so why would anyone of them think this was unusual for your sister (MOH) to do? Having a shower doesn't mean that you are greedy, it is a time old tradition meant to help the bride and groom off to a good start.

Answer 2

There is nothing wrong with this at all. Where I'm from, the moms, sisters, and aunties get together to plan showers.

Answer 3

My MOH was my sister. I am aware that the etiquette frowns upon immediate family planning the shower. If I was you I would see if the other bridesmaids will plan as well and then it will be hosted by the bridal party or like in my case we had mine at an aunts house so she hosted it along with my MOH(sister). A lot of invitations have a slot for who its hosted it by and as far as the RSVP I would just put someone else as the contact. Otherwise I'm sure you have one close friend that would be willing to help your sister out.

Answer 4

To be honest (here come the thumbs down) it will appear that she is fishing for gifts. Otherwise, why isn't she giving an engagement party, luncheon, or any other party that doesn't require gifts?  It is much more accepted for family members to do this.  Suggest that she do something where the guests don't have to bring gifts.  Then, since she is the MOH, she can suggest that the bridesmaids give you a shower.  Anyone can give you a shower if they want to, even your mother's friends.  

Answer 5

Not at all.  These days mothers throw their daughters showers all the time, and so do sisters.  Also it's one of her duties as MOH.  Let her do it for you.

Answer 6

Obviously you don't want to dampen her enthusiasm!  I don't really think the family and close friends will think it's in poor taste, but others outside your immediate, close circle, might!  

So, I would either really limit the guest list to the closest people, or I would change it to an engagement party or something.  That way gifts are optional.  You could have a money tree sitting around instead or something.  

Suggest this to her as an alternative, or suggest having her throw you a lingerie shower instead!  She is old enough to handle the racy stuff, but also young enough to really enjoy throwing that type of party!