MY long term boyfriend recently moved in with me and his brother came with him ?

Question

he did not have anywhere to go but he doesnt have a job and he has been here almost a month and still hasnt found a job, he is lying around til like noon and then gets up and eats and he sleeps on my daughters bed or on the couch and i hate it! How do i tell him he needs to get a job or he is gone? I do not want to sound like a ***** but he is 27 years old and i do not think he is even trying and i am not supporting him! I already have two kids, i do not need a third~ PLEASE HELP ME!!!!

Answer 1

Just tell him what you told us, that he needs to get up off his *** and look for a job because you wont put up with this c**p anymore and pay for him.

Answer 2

Talk to your bf. He needs to tell his brother to get out. If he won't then you need to confront  him just be prepared for some possible problems from your bf.  

Answer 3

Been there.  He has no intention of getting off of his butt to get a job because he can eat, sleep and s***t at your place and it won't cost him one dime.  He's banking on his brother being on his side with this.  Give him a deadline to get out.  He's probably already been through the rest of the family, but that's his problem.  You don't sound like a B at all.  He's a grown man and you have your kids to think about.  Good luck with this!

Answer 4

Just tell him that unless he gets a job and starts helping out around the house he is going to have to find somewhere else to live.  Tell him that you have your own family to support and its hard enough to do that with him not contributing too.  You wont sound like a b**** if you just talk to him, as long as you dont yell it should be fine.  try and be supportive, maybe offer him some help finding a job, bring home the newspapper with the want ads.  Help him put together a resume', small things to make it seem like you really care.

Answer 5

Just tell him that. You don't need to put up with that c**p. If you can't tell him, tell your boyfriend, and tell him you mean it. If your boyfriends brother can't straighten up, they can both get out.

Answer 6

Hopefully your b/f is behind you on this one.  If not, you need to stress to him that not only is his brother a drain on the finances, but to keep enabling him would set a HORRIBLE example to your children.  Starting a new living arrangement is a hard enough a change for your kids to get used to, but the addition of the lazy brother is unacceptable.  In your shoes I'd put my foot down and have both yourself and b/f give this dude a time limit ("you have 2 weeks and then you'll have to leave").  This isn't being a b*&#h, this is simply a matter of not being taken advantage of.  Tell your b/f not to feel bad...tell him his brother should feel like the s*****k in this case.  Leeching off of relatives should carry a prison sentence it causes so much tension and bad feelings.  Think of it as giving your new arrangement a working chance.  Get him out as soon as possible!  Much luck! :)

Answer 7

Try having his brother, your boyfriend, speak with him and attempt to either motivate this fella to find a job or find new living arrangements.  There is no way in h**l that you and your man should be expected to help finance this lazy slobs unwillingness to grow up and become responsible.  If boyfriend feels too weird taking with him then sorry but you'll have to talk with them both.  Inform him that your daughter is number 1 and that she needs her room and a good example, not someone who is so immature and unmotivated to find a place of his own and a job.  Best of luck.

Answer 8

Talk with your boyfriend about your feelings. Set a date that this brother must find a job and start paying his way or he is out. And make sure that you stick to your guns on this one. You are not doing him any favors by carrying him...trust me. Good luck.