Major pushover?

Question

why is it that everyone else's wants and needs come before my own? why do i worry about everyone else's welfare if it means not having mine?

Answer 1

Stop being a doormat, and take a stand?

If you let someone push you around once, they're going to keep doing it again. Don't be such a baby.

Answer 2

Hmm.....probably because you're older.

Answer 3

I can identify with what you say. I think jgaignun's 1st paragraph makes good argument. I find that with age I have become more comfortable with how I choose to live my life irrespective of how people label me or what they think. I go out of my way to help because it pleases me. My reward is in self satisfaction and therefor I never hope or look for anything in return. It is sad that selfless people are labelled pushovers. Frankly, I'd rather be a pushover than walk all over people or create a negative atmosphere for self gain. There are things worth standing up for but most things do not make or break.

Answer 4

Without knowing anything about you, my guess is that at a subconscious level you gain more satisfaction with helping others than your conscious self realizes. Also, what you do for others is an emulation of how you want others to act/treat you. Their failure to do so only pushes you further; so much that you forget about yourself altogether and work so hard to just satisfy others.

Bottomline, you know what you need but you are unable to find it in the people surrounding you. You stretch yourself thin trying to find an answer that is still eluding you. My suggestion is start over somewhere, create in yourself a new revolution, not a reformation but a revolution. Perhaps going to places you normally wouldn't go would help (say, a poetry cafe instead of a bowling alley, or a different restaurant with different people you didn't know previously).

Best of luck!