Make my life good again please?

Question

Can some one help me please till i was 36 i had met a lot of good who did me no harm and had lived a happy life .Then i meet a nasty group of work mates lead by a guy who hated me dragged me into the gutter and my life went downhill ,My own close friends did not help me when walked out of the job in-fact they tyred to drag further in the gutter and stop me enjoying my self and i was subjected to abuse by teenagers where i live someone had spread something nasty around .I have found my self isolated with not proper friends and for 10 years i have had a very bad time with people taking advantage of the fact i have one to give me any support .I all this started out of jealousy.,because at time they hurt me i was very happy and was a good looking women and had a job i loved and friends around me.I am now 46 were can i find good people that will bring my confidence ,love ,and laughter back in my life .I feel so alone and isolated .Has any one got any good advice

Answer 1

Helen, it sounds like you need to talk to someone, one-on-one. I don't know what your religious beliefs are, but you could talk to a counsellor, or a minister or a priest. Even if you don't go to a church, you can find some very nice people who will befriend you. Most churches today have different groups that meet through the week. There are women's groups. They have church dinners where you'll feel like part of a family. A good counsellor will help you sort through your feelings and help you get on your feet again. Social workers are usually the best counsellors I've ever talked to. God Bless You.

Answer 2

Helen, you can't rely on other people to bring you happiness. You have to be happy with yourself before that can happen.

Your confidence has been knocked because of what happened in your past but if this has taught you anything it should be that people cannot be relied upon.

My suggestion to you would be to learn to love yourself again - I know it sounds corny! Take a long hard look at yourself in the mirror and tell yourself what you want to change about your life and your situation.

Take care on yourself. Eat well, excersise (great for a confidence boost) and maybe think about changing your look ( a new hair cut or a new outfit maybe) Shed the past with a physical change in your appearance. You'll be amazed how much more confident you'll feel.

Then, think about maybe doing a course - something you've always been interested in like art, aromatherapy etc. Not only is it a soft way of building your confidence back up, its also a useful skill and a way of meeting and interacting with people.

Get on the internet and look at events in your localcommunityy - you'll be amazed how much is going on you didn't even know about. Join groups, go along to coffee mornings, maybe even do some voluntary work?

You will be so much more confident and happy and the best thing about it will be that you have done it all yourself.

Good luck x

Answer 3

honestly? I'd suggest going down to your local pub, and chatting to the people there. I know some people will reagrd this as bad advice due to the presence of alcohol in pubs, and so be it. I'm not suggesting you go and get blasted - just go and talk to some strangers.

The people at my local, whom I never would have met anywhere else, are now proper friends. I help them with the things I'm good at, they help me with the things they're good at, and we all get by.

Answer 4

1. Make your decisions based on what you want, not on what others expect.

2. Find a job that you like. Get training if necessary.

3.Go to church. Make friends and get involved.

4. Do something for someone else (church can help in this area)

5. Smile and try to think the best about people.

Answer 5

Move to another part of town or maybe just a different town altogether.

Make a fresh start. If nobody knows you, they should assume the best about you.

All of us go through less bright and sometmes dark phases but if you are basically a good person, all the nice times you had will come back to you.  People who mean you harm are very sad and unhappy people.

Don't be one of them!