Marching band? My 14 year old is quitting marching band and I feel bad? WHY?

Question

My 14 year old was in band for about 4-5 years. Last year out of that time she was in Marching Band. She participated in Band Camp, Football Games and whatever else. It was a lot of running, very demanding and about $400 all together. She even went to Disney World with her band last year which cost a lot but I think it was all worth it. She also plays Volleyball. Seriously plays Volleyball. She was on a traveling team last season and plans to do that again this year. Anyhow, she is quitting marching band for a couple of reasons. Her grades were pretty bad last year and we think she will have more time since she is doing volleyball for sure (she is really good at it). We have 3 children and we have a really hard time coming up with the money, unless we put some things on credit card which of course we don't want to do.

Yet, I am feeling bad like it's a bad thing for her not to do music. What do you think about Band? Music?

Answer 1

It sound like you daughter has a lot on her plate for 14 year old.  She probably likes volleyball better.  It also seems she's taking a responsible stand b/c her grades were suffering.  Band is an awesome experience that she'll never forget.  Is she more likely to get a college scholarship in band or volleyball?  She sounds really smart.  Unfortunately the stereotype for band is, "nerdy", although I don't think that at all.  She is a teenager and doesn't want that title.  Don't feel bad be PROUD of her and yourself....for the way you are raising you child.  She's a lucky girl!

Answer 2

I think if her grades were not where they could or should be, and she does play volleyball, too, that her quitting band is not the end of the world. My daughter quit volleyball after one year

because she just didn't feel that she could pursue it in high school. She plays percussion and she will be in the marching band this year, as was her older sister. As long as kids have some sort of extracirricular activity that they enjoy and they keep their grades up, they'll be okay. I would be upset if my daughter quit band, but I wouldn't want to force her to do something that she didn't want to do.

Just encourage your daughter to do her best at whatever she chooses. Good luck.

Answer 3

Its ok to quit but she should keep up with her music.

Answer 4

she is becoming a teenage girl....band just isnt cool anymore

Kara<3

Answer 5

I was in marching band all through high school. I quit my junior year because it was just too much. it was physically exhausting (my instrument was 60 pounds) and I just couldn't do it anymore.

Answer 6

-Sigh-

Because the d**n stereotype for marching band is "Nerd, geek or loser"

Fkn sucks.

I'm in the marching band, and get ridiculed daily, but I put my chin up and ignore them.

I love music and marching band.

Answer 7

Well first off, last year was my first year of marching band; I'm going to be a 15 year old sophomore this upcoming year. Over all, I've been in band since 6th grade. However, there's a HUGE difference between marching and concert band, and it took my all of my first week of band camp to realize this. Now, in all honesty, I really would have quit band after the first three or four football games, but my mom wouldn't allow it, especially since she had just bought me a brand new clarinet. (I had switched from Sax.) I had a really, really bad attitude towards the whole marching season, and then when concert season came around, I just complained even more, mainly because I was just fed up with band and everything you had to do with it. Like, my friends, who are not in band, got to do things I couldn't because I had to be somewhere else and they did not; waking up an hour or two early to have morning practice before school; taking all the yelling/discipline that was thrown at us for not knowing.. you know, the typical stuff.

Today, I'm excited for band camp, which starts in 6 days. Well okay, let's be honest here, I'm excited for everything except the boiling heat, and the fact that my mom aggravates me when she pushes me to do something. But you really shouldn't be disappointed or sad that she's made the decision not to be in band. I mean, if she really wanted to do it, she would, and who knows, she may come back in a year or two. Just give her time and space to do what she wants. I know my cousin decided not to do band her freshman year, and this year she is joining back again. (She's going to be a sophomore, too; 15 going on 16 in Oct)

It's proven that Band/Music students are smarter academically than students who are not, but it's also a matter of can I, do I have time, and can I afford to keep doing everything that is neccessary, especially with gas well over $4.

Good luck to you and your daughter.

Answer 8

maybe she just wanted a break.

Answer 9

I am also in Marching Band and think it is a blast. But if my friends were to quit I may also quit. Maybe she wants to focus on volleyball and grades?

Answer 10

when the schools start to run out of money, they'll stop the arts program and take that money and put it into sports.

thats the only way to understand why the sports ppl have the huge gyms and fields to practice in, and why orchestra has a normal classroom.  if you know anything about acoustics, you know that the average classroom isn't gonna cut it for an orchestra.

even if its just 8 violins and a cello.

and at the high school, they've spent 5,000 dollars in musical instruments. most of which didn't get used at all because they stopped the program for the semester. we were a quartet of 1 viola, 1 violin/viola/cello, and 2 cellists.

if she feels it, she'll eventually start music again.

music is an audible way to express youself. you might not have all the tools you'd like, but theres a song for when your sad, bored, or happy....

young kids that start music also have better math.

(1234 1234 1234 1234 124 whoops.  jk)

me- music is so big for me, in my house, i have enough instruments (not people) to have a 2 piano quintet (2 violins, 2 pianos, 1 viola, 1 cello... although 1 violin, the viola, and cello are school owned. and the 2nd piano is an electric keyboard on loan from my teacher)

if your a suzuki sardine ( a suzuki student who has attended any suzuki institute understands...) aka suzuki student who's attented an institute...  there is no better sound in the whole entire world, than 120 kids (ranging in age from 3 to 19) and some of their parents playing twinkle.

but God has gifted some people with the ability to play music well, and some to do sports, and some to cook, and everything else people are good at.

Answer 11

When I was in High School I was in Marching Band. I too, ad to come up with band fees up to $500.00. But when I came to college, it really didn't help me much. It all depends on what she wants to do with her future. If she wants to do music, well, I suggest not to do Marching Band in school, and do private lessons that will cost waaayy less but will be teaching your child the same thing. I mean.. I had to come up with the money, and my mom was a single mom with 4 girls. Each girl wanted to do something different and costly. Sit with her and discuss what she prefers, maybe she feels you are pushing her to do these extra activities. Don't pressure her. [no offense] Her grades are super important, wherever she goes. It's not a bad thing for her not to do it, Band takes alot of time and dedication. I had to drop out to keep my grades up. Trust me, it's not easy. I understand your daughter, but the best way, is communication. Good Luck :) Thanks for being a good mom.

Answer 12

I think that it is fine. She might just need a break or she might want to try something new. If you pressure her to stay in it than she will probably end up hating it. It's better to just let her quit and then if she decides to go back than its in her own time.

Answer 13

I dunno, i played in marching band my first year last year i was 12, thought it was gonna be great, but i really didn't like it...at all...i want to quit, but my mom is forcing me to do it again this year....and i really hate it alot. what i would say to do is let her quit. its really tiring to have to go to practice, band camp, competitions, and football games all the time, it is pretty much s******g my social life, and im always tired....3 words to sum i up: let her quit!!