Marriage in Islam: Nikkah vs. Wedding?

Question

I don't know if this happens in all Islamic countries, but it definately happens in Pakistan: people have their nikkahs before the actual wedding day. This has always been confusing to me. Are they actually married after the nikkah, or not? If they are, then what is the actual wedding day for? And, err...when do they usually consummate the marriage? Thanks.

Salam.

Answer 1

My daughter was born and raised in USA.  She liked her future husband after we allowed them to talk to each other in our open living room in Pakistan  We did their Nikah because yet my daughter and her future husband had yet two more years to graduate from their colleges.

With Nikah they were legally married. So with legal marriage certificates  I started the procedure of bringing my son-law  in USA by getting him visa of permanent resident which took nearly two years.   By the time he got his visa he graduated from his Medical college in Pakistan,  so he came to USA as legal immigrant.

We did a reception or what ever you call a good bye ceremony and both wife and husband started living together. He completed five years

internship and fellowship training and now he is practicing as Specialist in Psychiatric Medicine in California.  They had two daughters during his training period. They are living very happily.

So educational goal is a main reason for which only Nikah is done and living together and sonsumation of marriage is delayed by parents so pregnancies do not disturb their educational goals.   Having already Nikah if they happen to consumate their marriage without the knowledge of family, it is not a sin. Because they are legally married.

However, if they are engaged and in love, the danger is that they may sleep together and comit a serious sin which is punishable with 100 lashes for both in Shariah Laws.  So to avoid such possibility doing their Nikah is better than engagement.

May Allah guide our youngsters  to the true path of Islam.  AM

Answer 2

i think they are married cuz my pakistani friends what they do there nikkah to them they are married and start living together. but i really dont know i just got married islamically thats all i care that its done islamically.

Answer 3

if u mean nikkah as the marriage contract,then yes,they r married but not technically,they wait till wedding,when all ppl know(because one of the conditions for marriage is'' esh-har'' meaning that all ppl know) then they go to their house and be actually married :)

edit:

@SARA u know sister,now in Egypt,katb ketab is way before the actual marriage which we call الدخلة   my friend is married after the nikkah by 2 years!!!

and my sister is like u :) she made the nikkah contract but going to be wed on january inshAllah

mabrouk btw :D

Answer 4

What's Nikkah?

........... Sounds familiar........

Answer 5

Walaikum asalam :)

In Islam, the "real" wedding is when the nikkah is done...with the nikkwh, they are officially married... The purpose of the 'wedding'/ruksathi is really just for the heck of it - a 'goodbye' kinds thing for the bride...in Islam, the only two ceremonies that are required are the nikkah and the walima.

LOL srry if that sounds confusing

Answer 6

Holy c**p,this happens in India too..I guess people take it as a fashion to get nokkah done,then ahve "wedding" later..I ask them,what the heck is the difference betweent hem.They say "We dn't live together".

Isn't nikkah technically marriage.Why dn't they stay engaged till wedding day..Alternatively,why dn't they start living together fron nikkah day..gross..its all messed up.

SARa,i knwo your nikkah is over.I always wanted to ask you.Now that you are married,why are you not staying with your husband???

In india,this is happening too often these day.For no reason,i dn't like the whole idea.Either you get amrried and start living together,else stay engaged till you get "time" to get married

No offence to anybody.I just shared my thoughts..I need not be right!!

Answer 7

In Islaam:

Nikah = wedding

when nikah is done = married

therefore anything that is allowed for a married couple is allowed as soon as the nikah is done.

according to customs and people's made up rules, nikah is the must and therefore get it done in a more "religious" way.  once its done, then celebrate another day in a very un-islaamic manner, with exaggerations and fancies, many of which are forbidden and disliked in Islaam.  And because they wait for this celebration, they do not like the couple to consummate the marriage until after the party, and they(the couple) often aren't given their right to each other b4 the party. eventhough the party might be months away.

Seeeee...

How Allah made things easy for us, people made it complicated.

Edit: Nimmy, you are correct, but engagement is not part of Islaam and so it doesn't make anything halaal.  It is a non-muslim custom.  Nikah = marriage, and not engagement.  If the both side agrees and they have reason to not move in togather right after nikah/marriage, such as they are finishing school and the like, then nothing wrong with it.  But when the couple wishes to spend time togather after nikah but aren't allowed to because the families are waiting for the *party, this is wrong.