Married since i was 17, 35 now,4 kids age 18,15,12 and 3,?

Question

feeling sad,lonely,unhappy and really taken for granted now.i havent got any friends and ive zero confidence due to beleiving what im told for most of my life by some people.no groups to join anywhere local and ive only got this computer to use for whatever i figure out it can do.{i have just learnt by trial and error as to how it works and what it does]im not a saddo who sits at home moaning or moping and i love my kids but is this it?is this really what god planned for me?why am i so unhappy when i should really be grateful for what i have compared to so many others?i think i just need a friend.what do you think?

Answer 1

Your wonderful having all those children. Your a Momma. So why be depressed when God bless you with so many children?

Answer 2

I am kind of in that same situation.Except my kids are grown.I live in what I call a half baked town and there is nothing here it is basically for retired people that shop.Well I dont shop.

It is a very lonely place.

If not for this PC I would go nuts,because this Pc is like my window to the outside  You can always email me I would love to have a real person to talk to.

Answer 3

i have been married for 2 1/2 years... and i felt that same way... what i did is put myself first(i have no kids) i did the girl thing you know go out for a mani and pedi and a spa... the way to make some friends i would say go an volunteer at your childrens school... and meet the ladies there... GOOD LUCK.. i am here if you would like to speak...

Answer 4

Married 14 yrs.  I have 3 kiddos 7b,10b,13g.  Well since my very own wife will not join me in any fun in life, because she is a homebody.  I go out and Party out with friends and family relatives with LIfe of a Party chics, who are single, single moms, separated chics, divorced chics and widowed chics. Also with some newly weds and other married couples.  We all get together at like house parties and drink lots of alcohol, dance out and listen to tons of DJ party mix music.  My marriage conselor approve of this!  Conselor knows-just because I am married to a super home body does not mean I cannot go out and have fun in life in general.   I am 40.

The fastest way to make friends with life of a party people is to buy massive amounts of alcohol, barbcue meats and provide tons of MP3 variety music at someone's else house or yours. Goodluck!

Answer 5

You've probably never had a real opportunity to figure out who YOU are and what YOUR interests are. Now is the perfect time. You are obviously a good caretaker so I would recommend doing something that makes you feel good about yourself that you can do well. For example, go to a local convalenscent hospital and ask what volunteer work you can do there. There are SO MANY lonely and depressed people in those places. The best way to make yourself feel worthwhile and better would be to befriend and be there for others who truly have it worse than you. You cannot imagine how much weekly visits would truly brighten up the lives of the people in there. Even if you just help serve food you can mingle and get to know other caring people, or offer a caring face to the people there who maybe aren't used to seeing one there.

God has a great plan for your life. You're young and you've already done so much! You've raised three and almost 4 children and you have a lot of potential to do more, in addition to that. Just keep it in balance and do something that makes you feel appreciated. You never know, you might make some friends in the process of helping others feel less lonely.

GET OUT THERE AND DO IT ! Don't just sit and think about it. Take action.  If you don't like it try something else. Like serving food at the homeless shelter or whatever makes you feel like you're contributing.

BEST WISHES.

Answer 6

First of all-stop feeling sorry for yourself. I use to be like that but I was in an abusive marriage and could not do much of anything. Thank God I was finally able to get divorced. You are the one who has to make the decision to make changes in your life. You can always get out and get a job. Also find a church for you and your children. There are many nice people in church. There are many things on the internet to meet other women and make friends. You can also get yourself a hobby.

Answer 7

With such a busy life with the kids, I know this advice may be hard to do, but you should make time for just the two of you.  Your husband would make a wonderful best friend since you have so much in common.

Kids tend to take their mother for granted and can leave you feeling a bit under appreciated (quite the understatement, I know).  It seemed my husband was part of that until we started "dating" on Fridays.  Best thing we ever did.

Answer 8

Hey why don't you join a church group. You will meet other moms in your situation also a lot of other good people. There are many functions & activities in church for you personally and for your kids to get involved with. As for God, he has allowed us to make our life choices. If we need his help as I know we all do, all you need to do his whisper it to him. You will see and experience his love in a very special way. By the way, I congratulate you on learning the computer.  Good luck.

Answer 9

I think you got married so young and now you are wanting to know if there is life out there.  When that child goes off to kindergarten in a year.  Invest some time into some schooling.  It is never to late.  Or look for a part time job until the child gets out of kindergarten and then go for a better one each time.  Stop having children this is what is keeping you at home.  Be blessed you have 4 children.  I wish I would of had more for my son's sake he is 15 and he has no siblings.  You can still do things you want to accomplish in your life you just need to do it.

Answer 10

i'm so sorry for how you are feeling beleive me when i say i know how you feel!!! i also was married at 17 we were married for 28 years when my husband past away leaving me a widow at 45. i have  a 26 year old  a 24 yearold and a 11 yearold, i like you believed that my place was to take care of my family and slowly stop hanging  out  with any of my friends and devoted everything i had into my family, at this time in my life i am 45 with a 11 year old and 2 grandkids ages 4 and 5 that i have adopted(a long story) and seat at home or work and live a very lonely life so please do what ever you can to get some you time to enrich your life and your soul, you will have nothing to lose so keep typing away on the computer, go for walks take the kids to the park just get out into this big wonderful world.  do not look back in 10 years and be me. all i can say is that i wish you the very best and hope that this will help you some how. i'm here if you need to talk.

Answer 11

that you got married way to young,  and yup unless you get a divorce that's all she wrote unless you do something about it, like get out in the world!  doesn't matter what you do, go to the library, volunteer at the church, hospital, wipe the dust of your smile and get out there!  life is what YOU make it, so yeah, if you are unhappy, that starts with you...

Answer 12

maybe you shouldnt have gotten married so young.

Answer 13

Yes, it sounds like you are just lonely and need someone to understand what you are feeling.  Have you talked to your husband about it?  I know a lot of women who go through the same thing at your age but it doesn't mean you can't do anything about it.  Keep searching on the computer for things you enjoy and go out and do them!  It sounds like you have always done things for other people and never for yourself.  It is time to truly find out who you are and what you are made of.  That will give you all the confidence you need!

Answer 14

First of all you are to commended for getting married at such an early age and hanging in there, I don't know if I could have done it. Secondly you haven't explain why you're unhappy but having four kids can certainly be a drain on anyone. "I think I need a friend" sounds like I'm ready for an affair. I don't know if that's  the right answer. But yodefinitelyly need someone to talk to and figure out why you're feeling the way you feel. Good Luck  

Answer 15

you have spent half of your lifetime as a mother and your are only 35...there's nothing wrong with you other than being human.  You definitely need to find something in you that doesn't have to do with your being a wife and mother.  Whatever you like to do- hobbies, music, school?...take a class!  I found myself lost as a single mom- my only identity being "mom".  It wasn't easy, and I felt awkward (!!!) but I took a class, then another...and so on.  I feel more whole now, closer to my kids and generally happier.  Hang in there, you've got a lifetime to go yet :)

Answer 16

Yes go out and socialize make a few friends.

http://www.wikihow.com/Socialize,-Be-Fun...