Military question? Who's with me ?

Question

I have wanted to serve my country since I was 19 but I met My husband who was serving in the navy. He served for 8 years and got discharged in 2007. I said that I wanted to go in and finally serve the country I have long awaited to serve. But he went and enlisted in the army and now is going on deployment. since we have a two daughter and no family to watch her. they want me to wait another two years.I have had to wait 5 years and all because my husband told me to wait and wait time and time again.

Am I selfish for wanting to serve my country ? was my husband wrong for keeping me from doing something that would have made me happy as well as help our family?

Answer 1

It kind of sounds like at the end of two years, he will just do it again before telling you of his plans and you will be left holding the bag once again.

Of course you do not want to leave your kids without a parent present.

I am wondering what the maximum time frame is for delayed entry. Is it possible that you could enlist on a delayed entry bases now in order to head him off at the pass so to speak?

Answer 2

You can enlist whenever you want to, but you will need a Family Care Plan if both of you are military, basically appointing someone to take care of your daughter while you are in training or if you get deployed.  You have no family or friends to help?  You may want to wait for him to return home as he will be unable to redeploy for another 5 years.  That gives you time to go to Basic Training and what not.  

Answer 3

you can enlist anytime you want to.

Answer 4

By supporting your husband and bringing up a child, you are rendering good service to the country.  Use the time you are waiting to improve your written communication skills though.  This will be of great benefit if you do eventually join the forces.

Answer 5

No you are not selfish.  It is awsome that you want to serve your country, but you have a more important obligation, Your child.  She is now your number 1 priority.  She should come 1st before anything or anyone.

You don't have to be in the military to serve your country.  !st you can be there for your daughter and raise her to be a good citizen and a good person.  You can do volunteer work to serve your country.  By being an Army wife, you are already serving your country.  You could be involved in local government.  You could volunteer at your local veterans hospital.  The list is endless on how to serve your country without being in the military.

It makes more sense for your husband to remain in the military, since he already has 8 years invested.  He can work towards a retirement and he is probably on a higher pay scale.

Why is it really that you have this need to be in the military?  Like I said, you don't have to be in the military to serve.  What is it you are really looking for in the military?

Answer 6

You can find someone, my dad molested me so I had friends take care of my kids, their has to be an aunt or granparent that could be willign to take a few bucks a month for child care and your kids, why not hubby??? I was duel military, which meant when I got stuck in Korea for a whole year without my family, guess hwo watched the kids while he was on active duty, hubby, guess who watched the kids while I was deployed to Iraq...Hubby. If he does not want to bond with them while you are gone and after you have made this sacrifice for his career all this time, then you may just want to tell him, you are going to go ahead and do it anyway, and he can just sell the kids or take care of them, like any single parent parent does, like I did for five years as a single parent in the United states army before meeting hubby.

Answer 7

Not selfish at all.  It is very honorable.  Thank you for your attempted services.