Moms of twins, triplets. etc, please answer?

Question

Can you just give me a brief rundown of what it's like to be a mom to multiple babies?

You people fascinate me. I am amazed by you and your babies. Anything you want to tell me about your pregnancy, delivery, and motherhood experience would be very much appreciated.

Also, how did you feel when you learned you were having twins (triplets etc.)? Were you ecstatic? Nervous? Scared? How did you handle early infancy? I am very interested in that.

Thank you! Hope I'm not being too nosey.

Answer 1

Thank you very much! I don't have a ton of time to answer right now but I'll do my best!!!

Let's start from the beginning... the pregnancy. I knew from the very moment I saw that pee stick that it was twins. How? Zuh? Don't ask me... I just knew. Call it mother's intuition. lol

Starting at around 4-5 weeks I started getting nauseated at two individual times per day. I got sick at 6:00 am and 11:00 am, every day, like clockwork. By 9 weeks I was throwing up blood so the doctors gave me zofran to help me and man, did it ever help!

At 10 weeks I was no longer able to button my pants despite the fact that I had lost about 20 lbs from all the throwing up and food aversions. Man can't live on one bowl of cereal alone, but let me tell you that the Special K diet really does work. lol

At 12 weeks, still in the 1st trimester, people were staring to ask me when I was due, but the OB's and Nurse Practitioners all told me that I was measuring NORMAL! I knew they were wrong and I tried to call them out on it but they said that since I'm overweight (I wasn't THAT overweight, though.. especially after losing the 20 lbs!) that my belly was going to look larger. *insert rolling eyes here*

At 15 weeks I heard two heartbeats on my home doppler. My husband heard it too. When I brought it to the doctor's attention he said that it was probably a reflection or something. He completely blew me off.

So at that point, at my 16 week appointment, I just decided that I was nuts and that I'm not having twins.

Well, up came my 20 week ultrasound and there they were. Two girls!!! I experienced all the emotions. I wasn't really shocked because I knew it all along but I was in shock that it was really true. I was overjoyed, nervous, sick to my stomach with fear, everything you can imagine.

I'll fast forward now... I carried them to 38 weeks. The pregnancy was pretty easy after the 1st trimester, uneventful, just lots of ultrasounds and nonstress tests, though. I also developed pretty painful carpal tunnel which kept me up a lot at night. That and peeing like every hour and needing to drink around 100oz of water per day to keep hydrated.

Baby B was breech so I decided to have a c-section (big mistake) and at midnight on the day of their scheduled c-section my water broke!!! They were born weighing 6 lbs and 6 lbs 10 oz.

My motherhood experience has been a whirlwind.

The first day in the hospital they slept nearly all day. I was trying to breastfeed them between my many, many, many visitors and between the doctors and nurses coming in. It was akward trying to breasfeed twins, especially working it around people coming in to see me. In hindsight I wish I had told people not to come visit me for a few days but hindsight is 20/20 isn't it?

We had been up since midnight the day before since my water broke, and then up all day long with visitors, and by night we were exhausted and tried to get some sleep. That was when our sleeping beauties woke up. I was trying to nurse them but they weren't latching on no matter what I tried to do and the lactation consultant was gone for the day. The night nurse not only didn't have a clue about breastfeeding, but she had some clue that were incredibly wrong. What she did upset me, upset my babies, and I think partly caused the chain of events which came next. My twins ended up taking turns screaming all night long, which kept my husband and I up, all night long. By midnight we had been up for 24 hours. We didn't sleep- at all.

The next morning at around 4:00 AM I put a message on my cell phone telling people that we had been up for 28 hours straight and to please not visit us. I closed the door to the room and asked the nurses to not allow any visitors that day. Unfortunately, someone missed the memo because we still had a couple of people come to visit, just as I was finally getting to sleep.

I spend a good portion of that day sobbing hysterically because I was exhausted and my twins still weren't latching on. I started trying to pump and we were feeding them from soft cups with whatever colostrum I was managing to pump out of me. The nurse gave me a nipple shield which sort of helped, but not really. I felt like SUCH a failure. All of the advice the lactation consultant gave me seemed to not help one bit. I was so akward and my twins were just NOT latching on. The nurse we had that day kept telling my husband and me that we were holding them too much and to put them down and that they would then want to nurse. Guess what... that didn't work.

At 5:05 that evening, on the 41st straight hour that my husband and I had been up, 5 minutes after the lactation consultant left, the nurse came back in with two bottles and a case of Carnation GoodStart Soy formula. She told me that my twins were going to start getting lethargic if we didn't feed them something soon and since my milk wasn't coming in and I was no longer pumping colostrum that we had to feed them bottles. I had been up for 41 hours and I think I was going a bit insane because despite everything I knew, I believed her. I wanted to feed one of them but she wouldn't allow me to. She said I was too upset and that it would make the baby upset so she was going to feed one and my husband was going to feed the other. After my husband fed our little Reagan he cried. He said that he was finally able to do something for her to help her calm down.

After that they slept... and so did we. I slept maybe 4 straight hours.

I was so relieved when I saw who our night nurse was. She was the WONDERFUL woman who was there the first night that we had the girls. I was so exhausted and I asked her to please take the girls for us that night so my husband and I could sleep. I told her just to bottle feed them if they woke up. We just needed some sleep.

We went to sleep but at 4:00 in the morning I woke up shivering. I had a high fever and the room was freezing. I woke my hubby up, who called the nurse, and she came in with some warmed blankets which helped soooo much. I didn't go back to sleep, though, because I missed my babies. I ended up going up to see them once my fever dropped from the ibuprofen and I warmed up.

I went back to sleep somewhere around 5:30 AM but was woken up by my doctor at 7:00 who was displeased that I had left my babies with the nurses. He said that the nurses have a job to do and it's not to mind my twins. He was such a jerk.

My milk came in that day but my twins STILL wouldn't latch. I think the bottles ruined everything. I wish I had held out a bit longer, but it's too late now. I'm giving birth at a different hospital this time, designated as "Baby Friendly."

Fast forward to when we came home from the hospital....

I've tried very hard to treat them not as twins, but as two individual children who happened to be born at the same time. Having them on the same schedule (or on a schedule at ALL) would have been nice when they were infants but I wasn't willing to force them to conform to my needs. I didn't think that was fair to them so instead I conformed to their needs. It was hard, but it was what I had to do. I have always just tried to keep them happy so that I would be happy too. lol My husband and I had to work together when they were first born because I simply couldn't do it on my own. There were a few nights where we didn't sleep at all because they took turns being awake. For a few weeks my husband and I slept in different parts of the house, each taking a baby so that we would get some sleep. That was an advantage to bottle feeding... I did get his help at night with feedings so it wasn't 100% on me. It started getting much better at around 4 months and by then I started handling it by myself again.

I love having twins so much. They're best friends and they really get along great. They certainly taught me a great deal about myself, and about my ideas of parenting. They're complete opposites... they look differently, act differently, everything is so different.

I wouldn't change anything for the world. It is harder having twins. I miss out on a lot of things mothers of just 1 kid at a time get to do like going to the playground alone. I can't just bring them to a playground because I can't safely watch them both at this age. It works out Ok if I have another adult with me, even an adult with 2 kids of her own, because 4 eyes are better than 2! It's still worth it, though, and I know that next summer it will be Ok. I'll have another new baby but I can wear that baby and I can trust my twins to climb up playground equipment and not fall as easily. Right now I have to climb up with them and never fail, when I climb up with one and leave the other alone on the ground, that one will find a cigarette butt and try to eat it. Argh! Next summer they'll turn 2 though and most 2 year olds know better than to eat yucky cigarette butts!

So, in closing, I hope I answered your question! You're not too nosy. I started answering a few hours ago and have returned every so often to continue answering it.

lol

Have a good one!!!!

OH, and I'm 14 weeks pregnant again with 1 this time too!  Tomorrow is 15 weeks.

:-D  I was NOT hoping for twins again, though.  Not with my twins being this small anyway.

Answer 2

Well i have 3 year old identical twin girls. Growing up I always joked I wanted twin girls, my grandma had two sets of twins so I would always say how its possible. When i actually got pregnant, twins did not occur to me in the slightest! I was having pains at 8weeks 5 days and my husband took me to the ER, they prepared me for loosing the baby, they told me they thought i was having a miscarriage, they took me in a separate room away from the normal ER beds to tell me this, i remember just how horrible hearing that felt. They had me sent for an u/s and that is where the guy said "your my last patient on my shift and you have to make things hard dont you" I was like wow what a nice way to tell me im loosing my baby!.. then he says "you do not have one kid in there, you have TWO" I was shocked.. but happy.. pregnancy went good, i had developed a condition at 24 weeks called hydronephrosis, my urine was unable to leave my kidney for up to 9 days at a time, this almost made them have to take the babies at 24weeks.. i refused, over time it got better. They were born at 37weeks due to pre-E and were healthy as can be weighing 6lbs 6ozs and 6lbs 10ozs. They were my first so they were all i knew.. sleep didnt happen much in the begining, they each woke up every 1.5 hours and would not get on the same schedule. At 3 months that all changed and we got some much needed rest. Now they are 3 years old and just wonderful, they are very alike but very different, one is sassy as heck she didnt turn 3 she turned 16, and one is the "drama" queen. I wont lie it was hard at times, very hard, but it has been the best thing to ever happen in my life, and seeing them together is amazing. I would not imagine it any other way.I am now(lol realized first time i posted i said "not") pregnant again, 14weeks, and honestly we were hoping twins again, but its just one :)

Addition: your very welcome for sharing. Twins has always fascinated my as well, and it still does every day. I look back and the past 3 years have seems to just happen within a blink.  It has been the biggest but more rewarding challenge of my life. I feel i was meant to have twins. There were times when it was just really hard. You begin to become so sleep deprived that you feel your missing out on more than just sleep. I had no help other than when daddy was home, and don't get me wrong he is a huge help, but he also goes to school full time and was working nights the first year of their life, then the second year of their life he was gone 3 days a week for work and i was a "single" mom. or so it felt. I started to feel like I was so busy that I didn't even get to enjoy what was right in front of me. I wanted to be super mom and do it all by myself and do everything when it needed to be done. oh and I also attended school part time at nights. When I finally realized I can not do everything and I need to let the laundry go a few days, let the dust collect a little.. I was able to really feel like I was doing more because i was enjoying more. But man it was a big adjustment. Being a parent in general is a big adjustment. I never knew how many sleepless nights i would have, how much worry from the second i found out i was pregnant to now that i would have, how much money would be spent on diapers, food, and how dirty the carpet would get.. and im sure the years ahead will only bring out more that i would have never guessed.

Thanks for asking, makes me feel good to share a portion of my life, and always nice to take time to reflect.

Answer 3

With my third pregnancy, I was pregnant with twins - 2 girls! When we found out, I was ecstatic and nervous all at once. I wasn't that shocked because twins are common in our family, but I just didn't know it could happen to me. Hubby and I were so happy. At about 8 weeks, morning sickness started. I would get sick 2 times a day - about 8 AM and 3 PM. We went to another ultrasound. Baby A was doing great, but Baby B was having difficulties. At the next ultrasound, both babies were doing great.  At 18 weeks, morning sickness went from 2 times a day to 3 times. At this point, I was peeing at least 2x an hour.  We had 2brand new bassinets, 2 brand new cribs, 2 brand new sets of girl clothes. 2 children's worth of diapers, 2 car seats, a double stroller, everything for 2!  I went in for another ultrasound at 26 weeks and Baby A had a slow heart rate. the doctor said to let it go until my next ultrasound. it was now 30 weeks. The doctor said we had to have these babies now, or Baby A would not live. I had been determined to carry to full term, but I had no choice. After a long talk with my husband, we decided on a C section. 4 days later, I was laying on the bed, ready to have these babies. They cut me open and got Baby A out, she immediately had to be put on oxygen, as she couldn't breath well. Next up was Baby B, she was fine. A few minor problems, but would be able to be home in 1 week or less. 3 days later, my milk came in, I still had no sleep, and I was afraid for my life that I would lose my little Bailey. They sent me and Bella home, but Bailey was still under oxygen. After a week, she was off oxygen, but still could not come home. We visited her every day. After 2 weeks of virtually no sleep and long visits to Bailey, she passed. I had my hand in the box, feeding her a bottle, when she stopped sucking. I took the bottle out to see what was wrong and realized she wasn't breathing. They tried to save her, but they couldn't. We went home sad and happy all at once. Sad that Bailey was gone, but happy that Bella was still here. We had a funeral for Bailey. After that, we treated Bella as if she was made of glass. She was our everything. To this day, we miss Bailey, but are so glad to have Bella. We also still have all of her baby stuff. She never got to use it, but we will never discard of it. It's been sitting in bins for 14 years now.

My other story is about our triplets. My husband and I adopted them. Their mother was 18, on drugs, an alcoholic, and did not want the babies. She didn't even want to find out who the father is. They had very odd names: Abelard, Easter, and Syrita. We changed the names to Gabriella Faith Syrita, Nathaniel Jay Abelard, and Emelia Hope Easter. They are now 4 months and doing great. Gabi is on a heart monitor, but doing better. Emmi and Nate are eating some baby food, but Gabi is not. Emmi rolls over from front to back and Nate is attempting. Gabi still is not. They can all hold their heads up and sit while supported.

It is very interesting having multiples, they look so alike but act so different. Bailey is in my heart and always will be. We all love her. Bella is a constant reminder of how lucky we are to still have her.