Mother.. daughter?

Question

im under 16 and want to go to the doctor for a check up, i did a really bad thing, i had s*x, how do i tell my mum?

i dnt have clue wat to say?

Answer 1

Is it important for you to tell your mum?? go to the doctor and speak confidentially to them. make sure all is ok. what will the outcome be if you tell her? If you want to talk to her, go for a walk or somewhere where there will be no distractions. tell her to let you speak and to not judge you as you love her and want to be honest with her.s*x is really an important factor in a relationship and maybe its best to wait when you get older to continue.

Answer 2

Obviously no one here knows wether or not your mother is religious or has certain morals and beliefs, so we wouldn't know how she'd react. But, regardless of that having s*x isn't a bad thing. Doctors have a responsibility to keep everything confidential, even if your mum goes to the same doctor she won't find out if you don't want her to. Go for the check-up, by yourself, if everything turnms out fine and you still don't feel comfortable saying anything then don't. If you find out something's gone wrong and you've fallen pregnant, you'll probably have to tell her. There's no easy way if you're nervous, and i know i was very embarrassed when i told my mum, but only do it when you're both in good moods (or not angry) otherwise everything will get blown way out of proportion, and make sure you're ready to tell her otherwise it'll just make it ten times harder on you.

s*x is not a bad thing! and is not a mistake! I wish people would stop telling you that, there are ways to avoid pregnancy and you can always abort it (unless of course you're against that). If your mother loves you, which i'm sure she does, she'll eventually get over the situation. But like i said previously, if you go to the doctor and nothing's gone wrong, you don't HAVE to tell her.

Answer 3

do not make more s*x for the coming years. dont tell her directly but tell through a friend or any other member of your family likely most by her.

Answer 4

go with your auntie or older cousin, someone who is experienced and you would be less embarrassed talking to. i went with my friend when i thought i was pregnant...

Answer 5

It depends on your relationship.  I'm hoping you aren't pregnant??

Just tell her, your mom will likely be supportive and can provide you with what you need to keep you safe.

Answer 6

s*x isnt a 'bad thing ' and dont ever think that , its a natural thing and i think its disgusting that people have made u believe that s*x is somthing to be ashamed of.

you dont have to tell you mother if you dont want to and the doctor is not allowed to tell your mother anything either. its very sensible of you to have a check up.

other wise just say to your mom u want to talk to her and say you ahve been sexually active and think it would be sensible to have a check up , if anything she will be impressed with how mature you are to think of having a check up. she may not be amused at you having s*x because we all worry about our children getting hurt but shes should respect you for being smart.

Answer 7

Tell our mum you are old enough she'll be more upset if you don't tell her. I was 16 when i actually asked my mum how old she was when she first had it. I thought she would flip but she sat me down and told me ( even though she was slightly emarrased) i waited till i was nearly 18.

Answer 8

under 16? so are you 15, 14, 13?

Just tell your Mum. Take her aside and say 'mum can i tell you something?' she might be angry or she may just be disapointed.

you obviously made a mistake by the way you describe it and probably dont want to do it again too soon.

Answer 9

Maybe approach it that your friends are going to gynecologist and you think it is time for you to start going too, to get a normal check up and pap smear "Mary's mom said we are supposed to start going to the gynecologist and getting pap smears once we start getting our periods, she already got hers done and said it's not too bad. I'm supposed to start getting them too. Can you make an appointment for me"

-- You ARE supposed to go every year starting at your age anyway.

You don't have to have her in the room, and you don't have to tell her you had s*x. But you may want to - and to get some type of birth control - the doctor will ask you if you've had s*x, and if you are on, or want to be on birth control -- If you really don't want your mom to know - talk to your doctor and she might tell your mom it is to regulate your periods or something. But you have to get your pap smears every year once you start having s*x. Once you are alone with doctor you can discuss your concerns and ask him/her not to tell your mom - most likely he/she will not -- OR you could ask him TO tell your mom if you are too scared to tell her yourself.

I got caught with a boy when I was your age -So I never had to 'tell' her. My mom made me go to the gynecologist -- and she encouraged me to get on birth control pills, I refused at first, but she kept offering until I accepted - So obviously she figured out I was having s*x -- I believe moms need to offer their girls birth control

I know it is scarey - and embarressing - But once you tell her and get into the doctor you'll fell much better.

Answer 10

Ok so you are 16, its not a really bad thing. its a really bad thing if you dont tell someone! be responsible and tell her. tell her the truth. tell her how it happened and you feel bad(if you do)

Answer 11

Well, its your right to say that you would like to privately see the doc.  

Tell your mom that you are a big girl now...apparently you are, you are having s*x now, and that you want to see your doc alone.  No sense in freaking  your mom out.  If nothing is wrong then your mom dosen't have to know.  I bet it would be freeing to tell your mom, who loves you no matter what, that you've already had s*x and how it affected you.

Answer 12

You just will have to tell her. Obviously you feel some regret towards this if your saying its a bad thing, just tell her that you made a mistake. Your mom would have made mistakes in her life, its human nature, everyone has to learn from them, and to do that you have to make them. She might be a bit upset, but she will understand.

Answer 13

is it dont worry , just visit the doc , wash and clean before u vist , keep quite and if the doc detects the lets see , but do take care the if u have unprotected s*x u might get aids

Answer 14

tell your mum the truth and how you feel dont be scared

Answer 15

It's a mistake, tell her, and she needs to offer her help and advice. Women go through this. It's time for parents to stop acting perfect and be honest and opened with their children

Answer 16

Call and make the appointment with the doctor. A week before the appointment tell your mom that you have the appointment and that she needs to come with you. When she asks why, then that gives you the opportunity to talk to her about what has happened.

You understand it was a mistake, so maybe you could say          "Mom, I made a big mistake, and that's why I called the doctor. I had s*x with blah blah. " and go from there.