Mother hates daughter?

Question

okay my cuzin and her mom had a huge fight and my cuzin is 17 and her mom is 40 well i guess my cuzin never got along with her moms bf and just recently her mom broke up with him and a week later got back with him and decided to buy a house!!!

well my cuzin and her siblings werent too happy about it and my cuzin got in a fight with her mom and her mom started to threaten her and call her names and my cuzin was trying to be the mature one and asked her to please stop and talk when they calm down but my cuzins mom wasnt feeling that too much well my cuzin went on myspace and wrote some things about her moms bf and her mom found out and was pissed anyways she kiked my cuzin out and threw a phone at her!!! and they havent been talking in a week and my cuzin is so upset!!! i feel that my aunt took her bfs side and she doesnt want nothing to do with her own daughter i think its pretty sad!!!

and plus her bf likes to fight with my cuzins and likes my cuzins moms attention and when he doesnt get it he gets pissed off i dont know whats wrong with this guy or my aunt can you please tell me what to do so i can tell my cuzin and maybe talk to my aunt because they are not talking rite now

and to let you know i was there when the fight happened thanks so much for answering

Answer 1

Some women are not ready to be mothers. I think your aunt has chosen her boyfriend over her children because of poor judgment, but your cousin is 17 she is almost old enough to move out on her own. I am not saying it is right, but your aunt doesn't want to be alone for the rest of her life. My mother married a man my sister and I didn't like because he took my mother from us. As an adult I can see how selfish i was being. Your cousin should not move back home she might find she gets along better with her mom

Answer 2

Dear Aunt ______:

Men come and go, children are forever.

No matter what caused the fight, it is more important to focus on what can heal the wounds before they become scars.

I realize that you love your boyfriend and you want to build a future with him, but doing that does not mean that you should leave your children behind to achieve that.

Not everyone is going to agree with the way that their loved one's lives, but part of being a family is loving the other person unconditionally.

If you were to break up with your boyfriend, ________ would still be your daughter.

_________ doesn't have the power to break up your relationship, all she has the power to do is voice her opinion.

Throwing things at her and kicking her out does not help your relationship with your boyfriend, and only causes you to lose your relationship with your daughter.

I hope that you can admit that what you did was wrong, because even if you are not sorry now, you will regret your decisions later when this all sinks in.

Best wishes

Answer 3

Sounds like your aunt is being manipulated by her bf. And your cousins are trying to make her realize that. I think there's something that's making your aunt has on her mind that's making her forget what's important. Try to find out why ur aunt is so into this guy. Money? Security? Mid life crisis? Does she miss her ex- husband or trying to get revenge on him? Whatever reason it may be I think her intentions aren't to hurt your cousins, but is thinking about something that's making her forget her children. Try to find out why she's taking things out on your cousins and tell her straight out so somebody can tell her the words to slap the sense back into her. That will usually make someone ask for forgiveness and will make her avoid the drama from happening again. Good luck. Hope things turn out good.    

Answer 4

Your aunt is ridiculous. How do your parents feel about this? The way your aunt is choosing her boyfriends side over her own daughter is absolutly pathetic. Just let your cousin know she can stay with you, and reassure her its not her fault.

Answer 5

Your cousin needs to back off and start looking at moving out of the house. Get her to save her money now.  

Seems to me that your Aunt is into herself. Your cousin was wrong to put her family's personal business on Myspace, however.

For many years, my mother barely tolerated me (and her and my Dad are still married).  For whatever reason, she will just have to come to grips about that and know that her mother will likely never be there for her.  I wished I learned that lesson a long time ago.