Mother-in-law gossips, about EVERYTHING!

Question

Okay, so usually when the hubby and I go over to his mom's house she usually has some great big story about the neighbor or someone that she MUST tell me and everyone in the room. Frankly, I don't care for gossip. How can I firmly tell her to not gossip to me but in a nice way? The last thing I want is her getting angry with me for not wanting to listen to that garbage.

Answer 1

you cant. it would be like telling her the way she has lived her whole life is wrong.

Answer 2

Laugh and say "Goodness, I wonder how you talk about US when we aren't here!  I really don't feel comfortable hearing this, I'd be so embarrassed if I saw these people...

So, how are your holiday plans going?"  And change the subject.

She'll get the idea after a while.

Although, maybe she doesn't have anything else to talk about, so make an effort to start more conversations that she could join in.

Answer 3

Oh wow...I had a mother in law like that too.

Well all I can say, is that you can't change who they are. If you don't want to listen to it, then politely excuse yourself to go do something else. Or just let it go through one ear and out the other. Don't say anything or it may cause a big upheaval in the family and you will be next on her gossip list. You can talk to your hubby about it. What does he say?

Well, at any rate...I wouldn't say anything or it will cause some issues that will never go away.

Answer 4

don't be rude..........just bring up another subject and see if she gets the message.  she might be lonely and gossip helps her feel a part of life. initiate the conversation

Answer 5

just tell her politelty that u are not interested in so and so and that u would rather talk about what is going on with her life... if she continues to gossip either leave the room or excuse your self from the situtaion... also make sure your hubby backs u with this or u two could end up fighting ...

Answer 6

There's no way you can tell her you don't like gossip.  Obviously, gossiping is a big part of her life.  Without it what would she have to talk about?  You might as well start accepting the fact that visiting your in-laws will be painful.  Make plans for after the visit so you have a reason to say, well gotta go.  Or, take along a few bottles of wine, get drunk while you're there to make it easier to tolerate her gossiping.  Then you can make up some of your own juicy stories to tell her.  You could make it a game to see how long it takes before your fake story gets around to the other family members.  In-laws can be a real pain in the as* so you may as well start laughing at it now.  One last suggestion I have for you is to tell your husband you want a divorce - tell him he comes from a looser family and you don't want no parts of it (lol).  Good luck - sounds like you'll need it!

Answer 7

Is she alone ?  Does she have any friends?

My Dad died 2 yrs ago. My mom lives in her small front room in her big house , why? So she can see whats going on in the neighborhood. My Dad made the friends and she kept them. When my Dad died..well she is shy I guess. Her good old friends have all died and she has a few she volunteers with at a hospital one day a week.

So when my husband and I come over and listen to her 'seen' gossip we just listen and realize she has no life. And thats all she has to talk about for a converstaion ..her days are filled with loneliness. Be patient you may be her one day..

My Mom now has an aorta anurisim which is to big to operate.

Just listen and smile