Mothers advice! my son will be 5 in nov. dont know if he should go to kindergarten!?

Question

He is my 3rd child so he hears his sisters (6 & 13)

my husband and i think in two different ways he says hes going and i would like him to wait! any past experiences?

Answer 1

Not sure they would let him go anyway.  Most schools you have to be 5 by a certain date, and I have always heard the older the child the better it is.

Answer 2

Our 3rd child has just started kindy and loves it.  It gives her time to spend with other children and the days she is not there she has time with me.  It is a good balance.  I say send him.

Answer 3

Send him to school.  You don't want him to be 'that kid' going through school who's always a year older than everyone else.  

I'm a Nov baby and my sister's a Dec baby...we both started kindergarten the year we were five (so we were 4 when we started)...we were both in the top end of our classes.

The person who told you that your son is not eligible is not necessarily right.  Some places have early cut-offs, but most places have only a requirement of turning 5 that calendar year, and that means all the way up to Dec 31st of that year.  That's what it is where I live.

Answer 4

well it depends on your son and if you think he is ready. Can he write his first AND last name? Does he recognize any of the letters in the alphabet or numbers 1-10? Does he know his colors and shapes well? Is he socially ready?

I have twins that have an Oct. birthday and I held them back one year because they weren't ready. They still confused numbers and letters. They could only write their first name. They were immature for their age. Let me tell you, it was the best thing I ever did. They are 13 now and in middle school and both honor roll students. One of them still struggled at first with reading even being held a year but he caught up in second grade and now he's my best reader.

You have to go by your own child and your instincts. If he is in preschool now the teachers can give you an idea of what they think as well. I know a lot of kids who started with late year birthdays and then stayed back in kindergarten or first grade.

I think whenever in doubt it's best to hold back one more year. This way they will still be 5 when they start just like most kids but will turn 6 a couple months into the school year, which is fine because most of the kids will turn 6 at some point during the year as well and some not until summer. It's better to be the older more mature child in class than the younger struggling socially immature one.

EDIT: to school nurse, it's different depending where you live. I hate when people give wrong information because they assume the law is the same everywhere. Where I live you have to be 5 by the end of Dec to start. I also don't understand everyone saying send him so he won't be "that kid" going through school a year older. He won't be a whole year older than all the kids. That is ridiculous to send a child to school simply based on that. Do you people even have children? How can a child be better socially by sending them early than a child who has extra time to grow socially before starting? That's another ridiculous statement. Almost laughable even.

Answer 5

In our state, you have to be 5 years old by September 1, and my son turned 5 years old August 4, so he could attended but the school recommends waiting until there are 5 years and six months because of Kindergarten being all day long! So I decided to give him one more year of being a kid and not send him. It was the best decision I made. He is in 3rd grade and doing great. We don't struggle with homework and he is mature enough to handle the social parts of school. You will never regret giving him an extra year to be a kid but you will regret sending him early and having him struggle through school. A few people that I know that went a head and sent them are either on ADD Medicare or are doing poorly in school and thinking of holding them back. The reason that they sent them was because they did not want to pay another year of child care. What a sad thing. Your child is worth so much more than money! I recommend waiting and don't send him. It worked for me!

Answer 6

my son just turned 5 this past dec i didnt have a choice they said he could go to pre k which \has been great he enjoys it and its only 3 hrs in the afternoon, i dont think he would have been ready for kinder anyway so im glad good luck

Answer 7

Why would you not want him to get an education?  I guess I'm just confused.

Are you just scared (selfish) & want to keep him to yourself for another year?

Even if he is "smarter than most kids his age" it's still good for him to get the experience.

Answer 8

discuss your concerns with your husband and pediatrician at the same time.  boys develop a bit slower than girls -a normal thing.  kindy teaches them to sit still and concentrate.  many boys aren't ready for this.  it would be a disservice to the child to put him into a situation for which he isn't ready.

Answer 9

way too young. Wait. He is too close to the cut off. He will most likely struggle socially and emotionally and will always have to work hard to keep up. Wait another year and he will find school easy and hence enjoyable. You never hear someone say they should never have waited an extra year to send but you will hear plenty say I wish I waited

Answer 10

I would hold him out until next year.  In the school I teach in, the students must be 5 by Sept. 30.  We find that as a general rule the boys who start and have birthdays close to the cut off date don't do as well as the girls in same situation.  Boys generally just mature a little later.

You need to think about how mature your child is.  If he is not as socially and emotionally mature, definitely hold him one more year at home.

Kindergarten is so tough these days.  As you know from having other kids, there is a lot of writing and sitting still in a lot of cases.  If you aren't sure if he will do well, don't chance it.

On the other hand, you could always send him and if he doesn't do well you could ahve him repeat the year again.  The bonus about kindergarten is the kids don't really even notice when other kids are help back.

I have twin boys.  Had they not been twins and the one wasn't so ready to start, I would definitely have held back the other one or started him late.  I really think it would have helped him.

Good luck in your decision.  I know it is a tough one.

Answer 11

The state I live in doesn't give you a choice.  If your child is 5 by a certain cut off date, usually in September or October they have to go to kindergarten.  If he doesn't turn five until November he will probably have to wait until next year.  It might vary in different states, but in Nebraska, they have to go if they're 5 by the cutoff date.  My son was 5 the end of November and he had to wait until the next year to start and they wouldn't let him start early.

Answer 12

Your son is not eligible for kindergartin in the fall.  They have to be 5 by September 1.

If it is private school, I'd put him in a pre-kinder program.  They are usually half day.  If it is all day, it usually includes a nap.

Answer 13

My son is also a November baby; in our old home state the cutoff is September 1 so he had to wait, thank goodness.  As it was, he had a difficult time adjusting; for the entire first week, we had to lead him in by the hand, him crying the whole way (and it was only half-day kindergarten).  My son was an older 5YO compared to his peers in class; and had a tough time.  Your son will be one of the youngest in his class, so it may be tougher for him.

Your best bet is to play it by ear.  All children are different; though boys develop later than girls emotionally.  You can have the school district test him to see if he is ready for school; if not, they may give you the option of holding him back.  Does your husband really want to throw him into a situation for which he may not be ready, and which may turn him off of school altogether; or would he prefer you wait until he IS ready so he can develop a love for learning?

Answer 14

He will only be 4 when school starts. Too young! Wait..

Answer 15

develpmentally its best for kids to go to school, Kids that wait dont develp social skills as quickly as kids that go to kindergarden, I wouldnt worry too much about school for him, do some looking, and you will be able to find a school both you and your husband will both like. Right now he is typically too young to attend kindergarden, most schools have a age cutoff, try enrolling him in pre-k, many programs are 1/2 a day long, and are GREAT for them, Its tons of fun for him, and you get lots of time to get stuff done.

Answer 16

Children get to a certain age when they need more stimulation than you can give them at home. Nursery/kindergarten is a great way for this! WHy would you not want your child to get a head start on education? Think about how your child can benefit from it

Answer 17

Well I think it depends on your son.....does he seem ready for Kindergarten......? I mean if he isn't ready then my answer would be no..if he is then yes, why not? Does he seem interested in going to Kindergarten? Would he excel or would he fail at it...those are the types of things you have to consider....

Answer 18

If he is mature enough to handle kindergarten then sure do it!  Each kid is different though.  Some are quite ready at 4 and some need until 6!  I'm a October baby and just made the cut off so I started kindergarten at 4 in August and turned 5 just 2 months later.  If he has been in a pre-school program and is used to a little structure than I'd say go for it.  I know it's obviously a while away, but I'm graduating college this year at 21 and it's nice really nice to know i'll have a good job at 22 as opposed to just graduating at 22/23.  Like a little head start on life!  Good luck

Answer 19

Maturity, not academic readiness, is the key factor at this age. Could he handle the school routine, long hours, large groups, etc. without a melt-down? Is he able to follow routine and group instructions? Have you considered (if offered in your area) a K-readiness program? Pre-K or 1/2 day K?

Boys mature later than girls and if they don't get a good base in K and 1st grade, they struggle later on.

Hope you can make the right decision.

Answer 20

i think so! you have no idea how much getting them in early helps they retain information better. if you dont feel comfortable, do pre-school, even if hes already in it, he can go a second year

Answer 21

Wait!  Kindergarten isn't what it used to be. it's more like boot camp. If he's been in preschool find one that's different from what he's used to. that way he will have something new to look forward to.