Question:

Moving out and guilt?

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I am 22 years old and have been with my boyfriend for almost 2 years. He really wants me to move in with him and I want to. My mother always said "make sure you live with a man before you marry him so that you are sure". Well the problem is that I feel guilty leaving my parents. We have a great relationship and when I brought up moving out they got really sad and said theyd be too lonely. They are only 53 and my 20 year old brother has already moved out. I want so badly to live with my BF, but at the same time I feel so guilty. I have lived away from home before but it was in a college dorm so that doesn't really count. What should I do? I want to love my life and be happy but I don't want my parents to be miserable.

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  1. Wait a year then move out...one year is not that long and you'll be a little older.  


  2. Ah! This is an easy one!

    As a mom, let me explain.... I'm going to be SO SAD when my son moves out! But it's a normal part of life, so I will also be happy for him. For your parents, it will be recognition of the part of their life with kids at home is over, so that will definitely be sad, but you know, they've been seeing this day coming for a long time now, they'll be ok.

    As you get older, you'll have more experience with feeling sad about things that are just inevitable.

    Now, that said... are you SURE that it's feeling guilty about your parents? And not that you're just not quite ready? It's fine to be not ready! Sometimes you're not ready now, but you will be in only a few months!

    Take your time, when it feels the right time FOR YOU, then that's great!

    And your parents are grown ups, they'll be fine. This is not a surprise for them! :)
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