Question:

Moving up north, having problems with abusive family..?

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Okay. So I live in the south, have for all my life.

My dad is a total a*****e and a jerk off, wannabe hippie that's monopolized my mother's life. They've been married almost 30 years, she has nothing from the relationship. They had a private business where she worked at for 20 years, but she wasn't being paid so the fruits of all of her work went to him.

She kind of allowed this abuse to happen, but in my judgment that doesn't warrant her being forced to stay with him, unhappy and basically penniless without him. I am in school now, I will have a decent job in a few short years, and when I graduate I will move to Seattle (with her).

Here is the center of my problem. She likes the south, she has family down here. I hate the south, its weather, and I don't really care much for our family. I have wanted to move to a cool, rainy, semi urban climate my entire life. I feel that if I don't jump on the opportunity it may pass me up.

I plan to buy a condo and then eventually a house up there, but she may grow unhappy with things. I care about her, she's my mother. However, I don't want to surrender my needs for her. I think we can work out some sort of arrangement where she visits her family some months or weeks out of the year.

However, she's never really lived in a big city (nor have I) so the prospect is kind of scary to her.

How would you deal with this situation?

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  1.   Going to a big city where it rains all of the time would be depressing.  I'm from TX & it is hotter than h**l here, i would not want to move away from family.  Just tell her your plan & if she wants to stay behind, don't let it change your plans.  Tell her if she comes with you and doesn't like it after 6 mos. she can go back home.  You still have time before you finish school, just concentrate on that for now .a lot of things can happen between now and then, she may find a good man to take care of her or she could move to some other place, you never know, it is wonderful that you do have a plan to better yourself.  Lots of luck and you will be successful.


  2. bravo!you're so nice to your mom,i respect you for that....convince her,she need you so much....GOD BLESS

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