Must there always be babies available for adoption for those who cannot have biological ones?

Question

Could there be other motives of why some are not really interested in keeping families together, or for making birth control and s*x education information readily available to those who need it most, and for making available safe, legal terminations of early, unwanted pregnancies?

Could there actually be people who think there should always be a steady stream of babies available for adoption by "deserving, loving people who cannot have their own" yet want one and can afford one?

Thank you for your thoughts on this.

Answer 1

Children aren't footballs.  No, there shouldn't always be babies available for those who can't have them biologically.  It's sad enough when there are children without their families due to other reasons (death, desertion, abuse, etc.)  Why would we want to make sure there are more children than there already are being estranged from their families.  That's sick -- even Hitleresque.

ETA:

Cagney, I don't believe she's truly targeting blame toward infertile women.  I'm infertile and I don't see that she's doing this.  She's targeting it more toward the industry itself --  agencies and attorneys who grow their businesses by babies  being available.

This is probably an offensive sounding analogy, but it's not meant to be.  Although no analogy is perfect, think about pet rocks.  Someone made good money by providing the public with a product.  People bought it because it was there.   Before the adoption industry, what did people do when they couldn't have children?  Someone can always build a business by putting something out there that someone will buy.  If you build it, they will come.  The businesses that provide children know they can make some money because people who may have otherwise not had children may very well go to these agencies if they exist.

Answer 2

"i'm giving away free meth and pairing the users up."

Thanks for that, I don't see nearly enough complaining that "birth mothers" are jib techs. So is this the new crack w***e argument?

As long as people continue to make demands for newborns agencies will continue to obtain them.

There shouldn't be a steady stream of humans for anything.

Answer 3

i know that there is a waiting list as long as the day for people that would like to adopt a child from birth to raise as there own but there are also lots of children that need mommys and daddys that are older also. and i think that a lot of people do not realize that, these children need loving homes also. there are days that i wish that i could take in all of those children that feel like no one wants them and the saddist thing about all of that is most of these kids have emotional problems, or low self esteem because they are usually thrown around from foster home to foster home or in and out of group homes. these kids just want someone to love them and someone to call mommy and daddy.

Answer 4

Sunny -  Your user name certainly doesn't reflect your disposition. I think your answer is the most ridiculous, ignorance based answer I have ever read.    There are many reasons why women are infertile, none of the top ones being the offensive reasons you suggest.  If promiscuity, drugs, etc. led to infertility there would be no such thing as fetal alcohol syndrome and crack babies.  By the way, the majority of babies given up for adoption are not born from women that are addicts, prostitues etc.  Most are born to young mothers.  Many are born to families who simply cannot afford another mouth to feed.

The problem is that teaching children to abstain DOES NOT WORK.  Teen pregnancy rates in areas where religion dominates,  are higher.  Teaching responsibility is the way.  

Not everyone who births a baby has the ability to raise it.  Thank goodness for adoption.  I agree it should be more regulated, but it is better than no system at all.  

Why do women have to be so bitchy with each other.  Don't judge until you have walked in their shoes.  I have three children.  My husband an I were lucky enough (and I do consider it luck) to have three healthy biological children.   All after I was 30.  We know numerous fabulous couples who would not have children without adoption.  

They are fully aware that their joy is someone else's sorrow and they are thankful.  They aren't out there hoping some woman will be in distress.

Where do suggest these babies go, as inevitably and forever they will be around.

There are way bigger problems than this going on.  Really.  Much bigger.

Answer 5

Why do you hate infertile couples and women? Your hatred towards adoption, infertility and people becoming parents in a way that doesn't involve the woman going through labor in a hospital is disturbing.

Adoption and infertility can not be blamed for the fact that agencies or lawyers who help facilitate adoptions exist. Please keep your prejudiced and hateful comments to yourself. It only shows how ignorant you really are.

What would you rather people do with children without parents for whatever the reason? Would you blame them for adding to the homeless population as well?  I'd rather see those children REGARDLESS of where they are from go into loving, permanent families so they have a chance rather than do nothing. Just because someone is adopted or chose to adopt does not mean they are all part of a black market adoption scam either.  To say they are is redundant. While it is unfortunate that illegal adoption markets exist, and YES there needs to be laws to stop it and to shut them down to return children to their rightful families, they are NOT the premise of every adoption that ever happens.

The comment "deserving loving people who cannot have their own yet want oen and can afford one"- that is disgusting. You make adoption sound like someone buying a car or a dog which is so far off from what adoption is you have no idea. Please take some adoption language education and get a clue before you start to choke on the foot that is now in your mouth.

Answer 6

I think that weather you are adopted or biological born, all children are born with a purpose in life..

I think all those brought into exsistence have a right to have life.

I think there are many children that need parents.

Children are not a comodity, they are not expendible!

I think there are many unanted births and many people who are willing to accept them, some families have biological children and others do not.

I do not think that attacking people who what to have children validates anyone, those who ave been abused in the system and those who never have the privledge of having a tre foundation with any family.

I think that any couple, be they biological or adoptive should attend parenting classes to prepair for all that it intails.

As for those who choose to engage in s*x, irresponsibly, they still made a choice and it is still a life they have brought into exsistance and need to put in the hands of a family who will love and nurture it!!!!

Those who marry, and then decide they made a mistake, they can  not say, ok you should be put to death, because I don't want you!

As far as could there acutally be people who think there should be a stream of children to meet the needs of those wanting children...

What does that really matter?

Everyone has some kind of distorted thoughts or openions....

but personally I don't see how worrying about it or questioning it's exsistance really makes a difference one way or another?

Answer 7

isn't it better to have babies available for adoption for couples who are praying to have children who can't- then 4,000 babies a day that don't have a chance to life, because their birth moms abort them?

Answer 8

I definitely think so and i'd bet that they are also at the head of some of the reasons infertility is so common in America.

Hmm.... cause infertility, make a billion dollar market off of that, then make a billion dollar market off of giving them children....

$$$$ Cha-Ching $$$$

ETA: exactly laurie, i don't see julie as targeting infertile women or men either. I see her as targeting the industry that is creating some of the infertility, and creating the babies to supply the infertile, and not giving a poo about the children or families involved, only caring about the $$$$$$$$$$$$$.

Answer 9

I don't know if there "must " always be babies available. But tell me how you are going to prevent it?

There will always be woman who choose to place their babies for adoption rather than parent them.

Answer 10

i think i'm tired of infertile women being blamed for all that's wrong with adoption.  

darn you caught me.  i'm out poking holes in all the condoms.   i'm replacing birth control pills with tic tacs.  i'm giving away free meth and pairing the users up.

do some research, most pro lifers are women who are quite fertile.  



i think there's plenty of kids available now that need homes.  and the resources and education are hard to come by for those who wish to adopt.  it takes some work on their part, but many don't know where to start.

i'm sure there are those out there that will want a baby at any cost, no matter what the circumstances are.  and i'm totally against it and speak out about it.  i did my research and did an adoption that i felt was legally and morally correct.  

but i am so sick of the references toward us women who can't seem to have our "own" as being the main reason behind it all.

which is funny because my child that happens to be adopted is my "own."  she just happens to be the "own" child of another couple too, and i respect that.

what caused my infertility is no one's business but my own.  are women with breast cancer attacked about their lifestyle, and made the defend theirselves?  but it wasn't any of those things some have listed.  it's a bad luck of the draw.  and am i to be harrassed because there was another woman in this world who was pregnant, aware of all of her options and still choose that i would be the one to raise her child?  it's not like i went door to door and trolled around on the net.  not every newborn domestic adoption was forced, stolen or misled.  does everything have to be in black and white?  life just isn't that way.

LAURIE i do see what you're saying.  and i fully agree.  and thank you.  i never claim to be all knowing and am here to try and learn more.  this deals with my child and i will always be open to other thoughts and ways i can provide for her.  

but it just seems that it's constantly the reference to infertile women as to why there are the problems that there are.  i have no shame or misgivings on how my child came to be my child.  i dealt with my infertility as best anyone can, and then choose to become a parent through adoption.  my reasons for wanting to parent a child through adoption were no different than biological.  but i made sure i was educated about it.  

what happened before adoption was a regular part of life?  children were abandoned at churches and orphanages.  unwed women were shamed and banned from their communities and forced to live elsewhere, living a life of a lie.  no the industry is not perfect and work so needs to be done.  yes it's about money, as every aspect of life is in this country anymore.  but until we address the root of the problem, name calling and finger pointing is just useless and getting no one anywhere.

what i'm trying to say is instead of the constant finger pointing, why aren't people trying to educate instead of ridicule, finger point and mudsling?  it's the lack of education all around that's causing the issues in adoption.  

the main problems i see here are.......

1.adoptees can't be educated about their biology and biological families.

2.adoptive parents aren't educated about the inner workings of the adoption industry.  it's a real fight to do this education yourself.  there's not many out there to help.

3. and biological parents aren't educated about what the adoption really means and other options available to them.

but instead of trying to do that, the same type of question and answers keep getting posted, over and over.   and i guess today i've just had my fill of the finger of fertility being pointed.

Answer 11

Why were there so many paps hoping to adopt a child from Guatamla when it was under investigation for stolen children and child traffkicking?

These women were lobbying the US government to allow their adoptions to take place despite the investigation. There was a chance some or all of the children could have gone back to their families.

Why would they want to take a mother's child and separate a child from its family and homeland before the investigation was completed?

Answer 12

I don't think that f*ckups will ever stop making babies that they don't want.

Answer 13

That's really an ignorant statement. Infertile couples can't help that they can't have children! Children can't help if nobody in there family wants to take them! There will always be 1,000's of unwanted children and unfortunately alot of those won't get adopted they'll just simply turn 18 and leave. There are many reason's why children are in foster homes alot has to do with sexual abuse and physical abuse, there are alot that are unwanted or parents have died. You can give s*x eduation to people until there blue in the face but ultimately they will do what they like that's why I can walk down to the high school down the street or go to the store and see alot of pregnant teenagers.Also there are alot of fertil people who adopt to either because they want to add to there family or that they don't want to bring another child into this world family isn't having the same blood line it's who takes care of you!

Answer 14

Your post is very disturbing on many levels.  As the mother of an adopted child I hope there will always be children available for adoption.  There will always be wars, rapes, incest, unwanted children, orphans, and no circumstance is the child's fault.  They deserve to live no matter what. I cannot conceive of abortion under ANY circumstances. Your post is very vague and I'm not exactly sure where you stand on the issues but I KNOW where I do.  Abortion stops a beating heart.  Adoption creates a family.