My 10-year-old disabled newphew wants to go to summer camp?

Question

My sister has a disabled son who's 10 years old. He is the sweetest kid you will ever meet. He is not physically disabled, but he has some learning disabilities and he has trouble using the bathroom on his own without help. Last summer my sister allowed him to go to a summer camp away for 2 weeks. The counselors assured her that they would take good care of him so she let him go under the condition that his older sister(who is 16) went too and made sure he was alright all the time. We found out that some of the kids were picking on him because of his bed wetting and saying he was retarded. My sister and I immediately went to pick him up. When he was to go home he through a temper tantrum and told us he hated us and that he didn't want to leave. Camp starts this August and he wants to go. He says he loves camp, and I don't understand why since that kids were bullying him. I don't think it's a good idea but my sister wants to let him go. Would you allow your son to go back

Answer 1

If he wants to go back, I'd let him. He obviously had fun last time, so why wouldn't he this time.

Just because he has a few learning difficulties, its no reason for stopping him living life as a normal child. Life, unfortunately, is full of bullies. (I'm 21 and I still get bullied because of my learning difficulties).

Kids pick on kids, its a unavoidable fact of life, but trying to protect him every time something like that happens isn't achiving anything but disabiling him further.

Answer 2

I think they have camps for children with disabilites. You could always put him in a daycamp close to home too. What a great sister to do that for her brother. If she will go with him again let them go.

Answer 3

Find out what he loved so much about camp.  

If he loved being away from home and making new friends, or learning new activities, then maybe he could try a camp with kids with similar disabilities.

But if he just enjoyed feeling like a "normal" kid - even though he was teased - maybe he is tougher than you think.  Also, it's been a year.  Maybe his bedwetting problem is better now.

Answer 4

If he is able to not let the bullies ruin his time at camp, why not let him?  If he wants to go, and it's not an issue financially, he should be allowed to go.  I think you should make sure that if he has a problem, he will be able to call home and have someone come pick him up if he wants to.  Other than that, I think it's great that he is able to enjoy his time at camp and not let the bullies bother him.  Let him have fun.

Answer 5

His disabilities should not limit him to being a normal child.  That obviously is what he is trying to do.  I would not withhold this child from wanting to expand his horizons.  He is trying to explore and learn new things in life.  Keeping him from doing those things will only hurt him later in life.  

Kids can be very mean at times.  I'm sure that if he wasn't there, they would've found another child to pick on just the same.  It's teaching him how to cope with other children's behavior and it sounds like he is willing to do just that.

Let him go!!  It obviously made him happy and it's what he wants to do.

Answer 6

Yeah!  I know it is tough but he wants to have a life as all 10 year olds do.  If he didn't like it then it would be different.  I would prepare him in the best possible way.  Proper incontinence garments and wipes that are convenient and eliminate odor.     I would start preparing him early for how to take care of his personal hygiene, getting up a little earlier and cleaning himself up.  I would tuck an air freshener in his suit case and air tight plastic bags for soiled clothing.   I would be firm and tell him if he could prove to me he could keep himself clean and put his clothes in air tight bags that I would let him go.  Then I would give him a cell phone to call me if he had any problems.  His sister needs to stay home.  And last but not least give him a suit case of snacks to bribe friends.

Answer 7

ITS VERY HARD BUT SOME KIDS ARE A LOT TOUGHER THAN WE THINK ITS REALLY HARD AND WORRYING BUT IF HE WANTS TO GO HE SHOULD BE ALLOWED SOMETIMES WHAT WORRIES THE PARENTS AND FRIENDS THE MOST CAUSES NO WORRIES FOR THE PERSON YOUR WORRYING ABOUT!

Answer 8

Sounds like a tough little boy. Its hard for parents and relations, sometimes they, want to wrap people up and protect them, but in doing that they can cause harm. let the boy go, maybe not to the same one (his choice) let him know that if there any problems that he cannot cope with to call and let your sister sort it out.

children with learning problems like the company of able children, many people put limits on them but in fact the limits should be the child's making and parents should try to help them get there, let them decide that maybe their goals were too high and make other choices!!!!

just my opinion  RR

Answer 9

maybe teasing didn't bother him. there are summer camps for disabled people, mentally (learning-wise) and physically, maybe you could look into that. otherwise i would try it again, with his sister there. maybe he needs this. There are also day camps. good luck.

but before you drop him off to an "away" camp, make sure he knows that you/his mom are only a phonecall away. he'll probably shrug it off, but he'll remember it. besides his big sis would be there. :)

Answer 10

Life is full of bullies.  If he is so happy at camp that he is either oblivious of the bullies or doesn't care what they say...then more power to him..

Why limit his joy just because of a couple of stupid bullying kids?

Let him go, all kids pick on all kids...it's just part of life.

It's the people that don't learn to deal with it or stand up to it, that are truly "disabled".

He sounds like a good strong kid, if he wants summercamp...I say give him summercamp.

Answer 11

I would find a camp for the disabled and enroll him in that camp.

God Luck:)

Answer 12

Send him to a camp for kids with similar disabilities. It may not be the same camp as last year, but he will still have fun.

Answer 13

Not to that camp. Find another that doesn't permit peer abuse. Contact the ADA or similar organizations for recommendations. I guarantee there are camps out there that he can love and enjoy without abuse!

Give your nephew a hug for me.

Edit: Also tell him my 11 year old son said that if he heard anyone picking on him, he would stand up for him and get the bullies in trouble. He had a few choice words for those "bad kids" that I can't share and he says to tell your nephew to "ignore those lame losers".

Answer 14

Do a web search for camps for kids with developmental delays. Other kids will be in the same boat as him and he is less likely to be picked on. Counselors there are specially trained to handle the kids with these delays and might even be able to help him with the bathroom issues.

Answer 15

Yes. I would. What the 16 year odl sees as bullying may not have been to the boy. Or perhaps she had other motives for wanting to leave early? He needs to learn to deal with these things on his own to an extent. As much as we would love to, we can not protect our children from everything all of the time.

If he qualifies, you may check into special camps for disabled children. If the teasing was genuine, he is less likely to experience it at one of these. Doing this though, may cause him further teasing if word gets out WHICH camp he was allowed to attend.

Answer 16

Yes i would.....sooner or later he has to face the outside world....sometimes your desire to protect him can hinder growth

Answer 17

I would be reluctant to allow him to return to this camp.  Can he wear the goodnights that look like boxers?  How about a daycamp?  My son goes to a special needs camp and they are economically priced because of government grants.  Also typical siblings attend.  They go swimming and have awesome fieldtrips.  My son's camp is for 2 weeks 9-5 and costs 150.00.  The staff camper ratio is 1:2.  The trips include the Franklin Institute, MLB game (Phillies), Baltimore Aquarium tour inner harbor including going through ships, and Strasberg railroad.  ON all the other days they swim.  I would talk with him because he is old enough to maybe not want to be around kids with needs.  Some of the kids at his camp are typical, some are mildly impaired (go to reg ed school and classes)  to that you wouldn't notice differences without really watching-this is my son, and some have more needs.

Answer 18

Let him go, you should have never picked him up without him asking you to last year.  You are disabling him further

Answer 19

NO I WOULDNT ALLOW MY SON TO GO BACK!BECAUSE HE WILL GET SO FRUSTRATED HE MIGHT EVEN STRAT CALLIN YOU GUYS NAMES AND YOU KNOW WHAT OTHER KIDS DO!SO I WOULDNT RECOMMEND YOU TO DO THAT!(I DIDNT SPELL  THAT RIGHT SORRY)BUT IF HE REALLY WANTS TO GO JUST    TELL HIM THAT THEY ARENT HAVING THE CAMP THIS YEAR!!

Answer 20

No, I wouldn't. I tend to worry a lot and still remember how MEAN kids can be. I would probably wait until the bed wetting habits are more under control. But what you can do is have a weekend you set aside where maybe a large group goes somewhere special, like a theme park or zoo. You could set up all kinds of crafts and activities for him and some friends and that could just be in the back yard. Day camp is also a great choice too. Maybe the family can say that they will take a special vacation instead of summer camp this year. He will probably want both but that is just kids.

Good luck!

Answer 21

buy him the goodnights pants with the boxers on top so the bedwetting isn't as much of an issue. make sure he has a good supply of them and plastic bags to dispose of them in. Maybe he could pick one counselor or staff member to help him dispose of them if he needs help. Let him know that some kids are just plain mean, and to try to ignore them. thier insults just show how "retarded" THEY are.

If you can find a camp for MRDD, it might not be a bad idea, but the issue with my son is that he would be the highest functioning kid there. that bugs me. I am afraid he would pick up new bad behaviors.

Answer 22

i would NOT let him go back.

there are camps for handicapped kids so send him to one of those (they can be a little expensive)

and he probably wants to go b/c even though some kids picked on him there were others that were cool

Answer 23

It's your sister's decision.  Why are you asking yahoo!Answers folks to armchair quarterback her decisions?