My 12 year old son is stealing from me?

Question

He has been stealing from me since he dosen't see his father as much. ( only because his father was paying child support every 3 months, bought a house with his girlfriend and went to Disneyland the following month, but didn't have money for child support and now hasen't pay anything for6 months)

Yesterday I found a bag of 3 BIG pills in a baggy, they look like vitamins or diet pills...either way he's hidding them so he knows their wrong. Does anyone know what these pills might be? And is he jusst acting out and what do I do. We live in a bad neighborhood so Iam very concerned. He had a drs appt yesterday so I secretly had him drug tested and showed the doc the pills, he didn't have a clue.

Answer 1

This could be dangerous to his health.  Anytime a child puts themself in danger a spanking is in order.

1) No warning here, take the child by the arm, (he will fight you) bare his bottom and secure him. Give him a good 5 or 6 swats until he is crying and promising to be good.

2) Sit him down, tell him you love and let him knows this is what happens when he's naughty from now on.

It works like a charm.

Answer 2

Yah, id suggest taking them to the pharmiset.. asking if thier a problem.. its best to find out if he's hiding anymore pills just incase those arent the only ones.

Answer 3

the best advice 4rm me is

that just pay him his weekly accout

that way he will probably

understand and stop stealing.

just give it a try!!!

Answer 4

Why do you ALLOW your son to steal from you?  Anything personal I have is in my bedroom, my kids all know that my room is OFF LIMITS to anyone unless I request them to come in.  No one but me touches my purse, even my late husband had no business in my purse.  I suggest you keep personal belongings in your room locked up.  As for the pills...why aren't you asking your SON about them?

Answer 5

well asking the doc what they were was a good start. but it is also a good chance that he is just acting out because of you and your husbands split.. you could take the pills to  a police station and ask them to test them for you or take them to a drug store such as cvs or walgreens. hope everything works out for you

Answer 6

I'm sure I wouldn't know what they are.....you would probably have to post a good photo pf them or give a fewlly good description.  There millions of pills out there........

Answer 7

Well, I am sure you can find out what those pills are; you have the upper hand right now. I would confront him, tell him that you have secretly had him drug tested and that things will go much smoother for him if you let him know what the pills you found in his room are. His choices are that he can tell you, or you will call the police and hand them over to them and let them find out what they are. I would only take this approach if you can steel yourself against what your child my say that can say after you give him this ultimatum. Children are no different than adults in the sense that when you back the into a corner, they will tend to bear their teeth, and say or do some pretty mean things. Since they have no markings, I would imagine it is an over the counter supplement, but either way, I would still wan tot hear it from his mouth. let him know as well that if he woin't answer the question then you will lose trust for him ad that it will be difficult to trust him while he is out, so you may have to limit his freedoms. Either way, I hope you get an answer. I also hope that you both may benefit from family counseling, to strengthen your bonds and let him know that your love for him isn't gone and that you are there for him, in the same capacity as always. Divorce can sometimes make a child lose sight of that. Blessings......

Answer 8

http://www.drugs.com/pill_identification...

or you can take them to a pharmacist and he should be able to identify them.

Answer 9

Wow! Well the best ting to do right now ground him till you get the results back. To school and home no tv radio anything that is fun for him. This includes the computer. There must be  a reason he is acting out but if those were pill drugs something is worng

Answer 10

you did the right thing having the drug test. wait and see the result. Lock all your money and valuable. Put him on complete lock down. don't let him go anywhere but school. My guess is he is getting the drug from school. Get him in to counseling. After getting the results from the doctor ask him what to do next.  GOOD LUCK

Answer 11

Describe the pills for us.  Or google "pill identifier" and there are a few sites that let you put in some descriptive info & then they show you pics of various pills and tell you what they are.

real big pills does sound like vitamins - can you smell that Vit. B smell from them?

He's too young to have any type of pill in his possession.  Treat this as a serious offense, but instead of punishment, have an adult-style talk with him.  I say don't punish because it's obviously related to the divorce.  Get him into counseling.

Answer 12

It's not really surprising young children sometimes take money - it seems to have a magical quality and they can see that it gets you almost all you want!

You need to explain how hard it is to earn, why it's important to have enough and why we can't just take it from others.

Children need to learn about money and possessions - most importantly about the moral side. You need to teach your child that life would be impossible if we all just grabbed each other's things. See Related links.

It's much better to explain why it's inappropriate to take money or possessions from others than it is to impose strict rules. For example, saying: "You'll be in big trouble if you ever touch my purse" uses fear of punishment to control the behaviour.

Eight-year-olds and above should have an understanding of why stealing is wrong. But if your child does steal nonetheless, you should insist he returns the items he's taken and makes an apology. You should talk to your child about why this behaviour isn't acceptable and you may wish to punish him - for example, less time on the computer, not having friends to stay, early bedtime.

and as for the pills you shud definetly take them to a pharmacy and find out what they are and also ask him about them too.

Answer 13

Suzanne, talking to a child like an adult is useless because he is NOT an adult. He is a 12 year old boy who is acting out because of his parents divorce.

Talk to him respectfully, but make sure there is a punishment to fit the crime. If you let it slide this one time he will use it to his advantage......kids are pros at it....lol  

To me, showing him the adult way of how to be responsible for your actions will benefit him later on down the road.

Another thing you can do is put a hidden camera in your room and throughout the house.....I know it sounds drastic, but I've heard of some people doing it anyway.

Answer 14

call the police and file a report.  get the kid to the pediatrician and counselor.  take some parenting classes and start listening to your child.