My 18 y.o step daughter is g*y and she has invited her girlfriend over to stay the night.

Question

I'm not a prude or anything and the fact she is g*y is completely beside the point, if she were straight I would have even more of an issue with this. I don't agree with them sharing a room let alone a bed in my house, I didn't do it to my parents and I think it's disrespectful, my wife on the other hand sees it completely differently and says it's just like having a mate over to stay. What's your take on it.... Am I being unreasonable? The decision to allow them to stay over together (in the same bed/room) was made by my wife without even so much as a discussion.

Answer 1

i think that its wrong even though your daughter is 18 because as you said its so disrespectful! if she wants to be in a room with her girlfriend to spend the night with then she can do that somewhere else. im sorry for what your going through but i think its so wrong... and im sorry because your wife is not supporting you on this.

Good Luck!!!! =]

  

Answer 2

In your house, your rules.  I, at 18, was NOT permitted to sleep in the same room as my boyfriend.  and I think this is typical of most households.   What they do under their own roof is their deal.  But they're not married.. legal partners or whatever, therefore sleeping together in your home is not appropriate.

Answer 3

dats not unreasonable at all. it's ur house and it is disrespectful for her to share a room with the person she's dating. my mom would never let that go down. my mom wouldn't even let him/her spend the night in the first place

Answer 4

You have just as much say in this as your wife, and I think you should let everyone involved know how you feel about the situation.  My FIANCE's mother doesn't even agree with me sharing a room with him until we're married.  Everyone just sees this situation differently depending on their upbringing.

Answer 5

It's your house. g*y or straight, she should not be having "sleepovers" in your home.

Answer 6

She's eighteen. She's an adult, not a kid any more. Why on earth should it be 'disrespectful'? In what way is it affecting you?

You are being a bit of a prude, by not accepting the fact that your step daughter is a mature woman that has, and is entitled to have, mature relationships. There shouldn't even be a discussion about whether to 'allow' them to share a room. They're not children who have to be 'allowed' to do things.

Answer 7

It's a bad idea.

Gender doesn't matter--It's STILL her partner--and they are STILL in a relationship-- and they will STILL try stuff.

If she wants to have a sleep over, tell her to invite a boy. Or a girl she's NOT dating.

Answer 8

So you're saying if they were straight you'd be more pissed. Its a sleepover girls have them all the time. I always spent the night at friends houses and they spent the night at mine. Id have slumber parties and a bunch of girlw ould come over and we'd watch movies. Really I think you are overreacting.

Answer 9

The real issue is your marriage. I think you need a huge discussion with your wife about decision  making that involves YOUR home. I presume you are paying for your home so take that aspect of it as the basis for your right to have a vote.  What else is she going to decide wtihout you I wonder

Answer 10

your in the right ! don't let her have a sexual partner over ! Why is it that young people are so okay with throwing that kinda stuff in their parents faces. I was never like that! its rude, to put your parents in that uncomfortable situation. If she thinks she is old enough to have a mate sleep under your roof in the same bed, then she is old enough to move out and get her own d**n place, how about just getting that cheap motel. dont let her walk all over you dad !

Answer 11

You aren't being unreasonable, you are just being a dad.  I know my dad would have not let me have a boyfriend over to stay the night.  I am sure it is partly because it makes you feel uncomfortable?  That is normal too.  

Answer 12

your house your rules don't give in as you will regret allowing you moral belief to be compromised

Answer 13

well yeah. i think you're totally right on.

it's just like having a boyfriend to stay the night. not really appropriate.

Answer 14

that's normal now.  and i get the whole "my house my rules" but she is an adult and i think she should be able to have her girlfriend stay over.  

Answer 15

Well you had s*x while she is there... i'm sure she has probably heard it. thats disrespectful. she is 18... she will fool around even if they are in the same room or not.

Answer 16

You are being very unreasonable. She is 18 and you should trust her to listen to you just tell her you do not want her to do anything bad.

She will complaine but shes a teenager what else do they do. if she knows you trust her she'll be good.

Answer 17

i don't think you are being unreasonable

i just think that you should give this a chance

the only main issue here is trust

if you trust your step daughter.. then nothing will happen the way you think it will  

Answer 18

yes thats true, her being g*y has nothing to do wit it, but if its ur house then talk it over with her, just tell her how u feel

Answer 19

Your daughter is an adult, if she wants to sleep with her partner tell her to get her own place.  You make the rules is YOUR home not her.

Answer 20

you asre being very reasonable  i would maske this stop at once

Answer 21

You are totally reasonable - If its in your house - its your rules