My 2 1/2 year old is a handful all day long. Any advice??

Question

My daughter is a little over 2 1/2 and goes to daycare 5 days a week. On weekends she is alone with me. She is a very vibrant and intelligent little thing and loves fun...but she can't seem to occupy herself. I have a big playroom for her, filled with lots of toys. I play and do things with her...but she constantly needs my attention. I am not exaggerating when I say I hear the word "Mommy" on average about 8 times every minute. She also does tantrums if she doesn't get her own way. I will offer her a cookie but she will insist on another in the fridge and scream and kick. I love her dearly but sometimes I just want to cry because she can be very draining. How should I handle all of this? Will this improve?

Answer 1

hahaha I'm going through the same thing I work Tuesday to Friday home from the weekend and although I'm so sore and wore out by the time I'm off on the weekend I got my 2 year old son wanting to play some football, baskteball or just go to the park. It overwhelming and I get pissy but what you should do is put on barney watch it with your kid and do some of the dances with your kid and although your not giving the show 100% of your attention your child will love that your there with him/her. Punishing a child for wanting to play with their parents isn't right. Later in life when a kid is out and not calling you when their in trouble your going to wonder where you went wrong when I'm tired and my son want to play I try to do the littlest thing as simple as coloring or maybe do some clap songs. Play peek a boo that never get old, or if your tired don't want to get out of bed hide under the sheet and then let them hide under the sheets....all a kid want is your attention. Toys can do so much but like one suggested maybe try to find some little friend my son has a 8 year old boy who he love to hang out with and so during the summer I let him hang out with his older friend.....

Answer 2

my sisters boy is six and will call u even name in the book then hit u. for him if he bes good he can get on the computer and go to noggin to play kids games they have them for all ages. it puts his mind to work. she needs stuff that makes her think. man i remember when i was youngh i loved to just have a box. that is what i plan to use for my sons first birthday make a maze or have them make houses or cars something. color them. u can get a big box at a packing store or at like walmart or lowes and u can start her out by asking where she wants the door at and windows and u can cut them out and have her draw pictures of flowers and grass on them. stuff like that. she can invite her teddy bears over to play in it or her dollys. what she is into. my other sisters girl will play for hours and hours by her self but her mother doesnt let her have much sugar and i that help with it. u might want to try giving her veggies or furit if she wants a snack no need getting her more sugar. remember there is a sugar high and low. and the low is not the fun part that is all the kicking and stuff. u might want to look at what she is eating and see if that plays into it. i would also talk to her doctor and see how much juice she should be having. i water my sons down alot. well good luck

Answer 3

i know exactly how you feel. My 3 1/2 yr old is the same way. I honestly dont know what to tell you to do. Be happy you work, I am a sahm. She does need attention, maybe she's afraid you are going to leave her on the weekends to go to work. Or maybe she feels like she doesn't get enough time with you so she really wants to make up for it when she can.

I would suggest to spend at least 15min when you get home concentrating on ONLY her. (dinner, chores, phone calls, e mail can wait.)And maybe on the weekends plan a special few hours where you take her to do something fun. (even if it's to the park to do sidewalk chalk.)

Give her as much attention as you can and still get other things done.

Its hard, and most likely it wont end anytime soon. Sorry to say.

Answer 4

At that age they are generally full of energy and ready to go go go, whether it is the weekend or not. They don't have a very long attention span, so don't expect her to sit down and play with something for very long.

The caregivers at the daycare are usually trained to provide various activities to keep the day moving and the children occupied and happy. I would ask them on some ideas of what she enjoys doing when she's there, so you can try them at home. They should be more than happy to help you.

As for the tantrums...Don't give in!! All toddlers test their limits with adults. If you offer her a cookie and she wants more, stick your guns and tell her no, but also tell her why. A lot of times tantrums are because the child is frustrated or doesn't understand. Don't just say "It will spoil your dinner." Tell her that cookies are treats and if she eats too many now then her tummy won't have room for the good stuff that makes her grow. It seems like a lot of detail for a toddler, but you would be surprised at what they understand.

Don't worry. She will grow out of it. She will gain a longer attention span and be interested in different types of play (in which she can occupy herself). And as long as you are consistent in what she can or can't have, she will learn her limits.  

Answer 5

Hello.

You really just need to nip this in the bud.  I don't agree with the previous answerer.

You're right.  She does need her own independence, and so do you.

And giving her food to ease the situation is not a good thing... think about it.  Once in a while yes, but not all the time.

We went through this with out two boys.  Then we did family counseling because I was so miserable and so were the kids. Our younger one really didn't want the separation and put me through h**l! I started having anxiety attacks.

I learned a few things.  I had to learn to address the kids right on.  "I'm sorry but I can't play with you right now.  I'm busy.  You will have to go play by yourself." The next thing I had to do was learn to ignore their improper behavior.  There were a lot of "time out" moments for interruptions and tantrums. We used our bathroom as a time-out zone.

We learned to limited TV, movies, computer, and video games... allowing our children to learn to use their imagination more.  If they did watch television or movies it was something where they learned and advanced their mental power.

Try "Your Baby Can Read", items by PBS, etc.

I know time-out seems harsh and unfair, but kids really need boundries.  And she needs to learn that mommy is mommy and not her friend.  It's about respect too.  And in the end you both will be happier.  And if you an get her involved in tasks where she is learning and growing instead of just being a troll in front of a TV that's so much better for you and for her!  She will be better adjusted.

The My Baby Can Read and other likewise videos are good to help your kids learn whereas other videos just are more likely to make the TV seem like a "friend" to your kid.  You know?  Knowledge is power.

Answer 6

Well, i guess the problem is when she go to daycare everyday,all she spend her time is being around with kids, adults(caregiver), toys,toys, toys..not mommy. At the end of the day, mommy is tired, she eats, bath, a little of this, a little of  that...not mommy..then off to bed. In morning, same thing. On weekend, mommy time but where is mommy's attention?...no more playing of toys, she needs your attention. Talk to her often. it does'nt matter what are you saying or talking about, she just want your attention. Ask her what's bothering her. Ask her what she wants instead of just offering something that didn't ask.

Perhaps ask the daycare personnel if how is she doing over there if she somewhat lonely, looking for you, acting the way she acted if she's with you....ask.  

Answer 7

maybe find her a playmate in your neihborhood that you can arrange playdates with...also too many toys at once is not good, they need only a few so they are not overstimulated and once they get bored with it then introduce a new one. one more thing...dont try to bribe her with cookies, your her mother and should be able to be stern and say no and stick to it. good luck :)