My 2nd graders teacher is picking on her?

Question

My 7 year old daughter no longer wants to go to school, she is an excellent student and brings home straight A's. She is younger then the other students in her class, and I know she does tend to talk when she shouldn't be. It seems however, that her teacher tend to single her out for anything she can find.

She has made her return to her seat and walk back to her because her ponytail was swinging when she walked.

She made her sit at a table andwatch the other kids eat there snack, and did not let her eat hers because she had been talking.(they have a late lunch)

She told her would call her parents if she did not get a perfect score on her science test. Because she was done before everyone else.(by the wy she did!)

Another girl punched my daughter in the chest and when she reported it to the teacher she told her she didn't want to deal with it. And yesteday, she actually tod the class s was going to pick on her! She cries about going to school now.

Answer 1

You have the right to be in that class and you should.If you see anything go straight to the principle.

Answer 2

Before jumping all over the teacher, it's only fair to hear her side of the story.   My kids tell me about terrible teacher incidents all the time, and when I do a little investigation, it turns out that each child was at least partially at fault.

You have acknowledged that your daughter talks in class at inappropriate times.  She may also be doing other things in class that are not in accordance with classroom rules.   I don't see anything wrong, for example, in not allowing a child to have a snack if they are talking out of turn.  No kid ever died having to wait until lunchtime to eat.  

Send the teacher an e-mail outlining some of the incidents you described (I would leave out the snack incident), and ask her if she could shed some light on these events.  You will then have a much better idea of the situation.  Perhaps there is a personality conflict here between the teacher and your daughter, and it's a poor match.  If that's really the case, then maybe the principal would consider moving her to another class.  But I suspect that the things your daughter is telling you are not the whole story.

Answer 3

The suggestion of sitting in on the class are good, but the teacher will probably behave once you show up.  I would go unannounced and stand outside the door and listen.  See if you observe anything.  I then would take your concerns to the teacher and the principal.  It is awfull that a 2nd grader hates to go to school.

Answer 4

I saw a news story about a parent who sent their elementary school child to class with a digital recorder to find out what the REAL story is in school.  They discovered the teacher was verbally abusing the kids and she is under investigation now.  Stick a recording device into your daughter's backpack.

I also like the suggestion to sit in on the class for a 1/2 day.

Answer 5

Notify the principal w/o telling the teacher that you did so. When you speak to the principla let her know that you are going to make a complaint to the board if this is not addressed.  If you can go in there with your husband to make the point even clearer.  I've done this once before and it all changed right after.

Also, you can stick a tape recorder in your daughters bookbag-if you want real proof.

Answer 6

I sympathize with you and your daughter. I know that your daughter is probably frustrated and upset about what is going on at home and I know it is upsetting to see your child upset. It is also natural to defend your daughter.

Being a teacher and a parent, I can relate to both sides of this situation. Right now I am dealing with a student that sounds very similiar to your daughter. He is a sweet little boy. I love everything about him and I hate that I have to discipline him. I know that he feels that he is being picked on but in reality, he is causing a disruption.

Just because she is an excellent student doesn't mean that she is walking like she should be. It doesn't mean that she is following her teachers instructions. While she may not be aggressive or disrespectful, she is being disobedient. If the teacher did not care about her then she wouldn't take time to correct her.

If the teacher told her the class was going to pick on her, chances are they probably were. I have told children before that if they didn't change their attitude or change their behavior their classmates may not want to play with them. I have pointed out to them that they didn't want to sit next to the child that talks all the time and gets them into trouble.

I am willing to bet that your daughter didn't get snack because she didn't follow directions during snack time. If she didn't follow directions because she wasn't paying attention, then she has to live with the choices she made. I am sure that the other children that do not listen, also would have to miss snack.

I would set up a parent teacher conference and I would bring your daughter. The parent and teacher need to be on the same page, a united front. Do not let your child know that you are going to defend her for all the things going on at school. Tell her that you are sure her teacher had a reason for her actions and that you are going to the school to find out. Make your daughter a part of this. Do not lower yourself to a grade school level and do the he said, she said thing.

I am sure that your daughter is a wonderful girl and just needs to learn to control her socializing.

Good Luck. SD

Answer 7

Is this coming from your daughter or the teacher?  There are two sides to every story.  I would investigate before jumping to accusations.

Answer 8

Call the teacher, tell her if she does not knock it off ask her side of the story, have your daughter go to school and if she does it again call the teacher and say my daughter is going to transfor schools, and i will call the police, and i will tell the district/schoolboard and principal, and will sue for mental and verbel harassment. I feel so bad for your daughter. She is so good for putting up with it even though she did cry.

P.S. don't go in the class or tell your going in the class, watch through a window so the teacher doesn't know your there because she might just be nice for you then when you leave she starts being mean again. once you see something go straight to the school's office

Answer 9

If you totally believe your child, and honestly doubt that she would invent any of it, I would have changed her classroom yesterday!  Yes, teachers do take a dislike to many students - you need to protect your daughter and her future education.  Move her out now!

Answer 10

Make your presence known.  Take 1/2 day off work & sit in class with daughter.  Don't participate, just sit in back & observe.  Don't schedule this day with the school - spring it on them by surprised.

Then take meeting with teacher about your concerns.  If still not satisfied, go to principal, then school board.

Answer 11

I TOTALLY agree with Suzanne...get your butt to that school and sit in the back of the classroom...let that teacher know that you know whats going on and you won't put up with it...I would start documenting EVERYTHING that happens and take it up with the school board. See if you can get information from other mother's about what there children see happening with your kid and the teacher.

Answer 12

I kinda know what your daugther is going through. Some Teachers can be mean. The 1st step is to talk to the teacher. If that does not help put a tape recorder in your daughters back to hear what is going on. and or call the person in charge of the school. If that does not help call the superindent of the school. if he is no help. Go to the school board. Most time that does not help. so If that does not help maybe a getting her a new class or privite school Privite school does cost alot. The main thing is to keep your daughter happy and safe and in school. It shoulds like the teacher is picking on her. Always Take your daughters side   Do whatever you can for your daughter if that means fighting with the school or find a privite school to send her to. Ask your Daughter How she will feel if she wants to get a new class or go to privite school. I  hope everything works out for your daughter.

Answer 13

Oh the poor thing - I would be at that school all day if this was going on with my daughter - how dare that teacher.... I wouldn't even think twice about it. You be there tomorrow morning, and sit in that class with her and tell the teacher exactly what you just told us, and let her explain to you face to face each and every action. The poor little thing - grrrr. that angers me so!!! good luck ♥

Answer 14

Have you discussed any of this with her teacher?  I'd speak with her directly about the changes in your daughter's behavior.  See what she says.  If it continues then have your daughter move to another class.  Above all, trust your instincts.  If you think something's wrong it probably is.  You know your child better than anyone.