My 3 Year Old Daughter didn't want to leave her father's house?

Question

My 3 year old visits her dad ownce a month and for the second time in a row she came back home with a little frown. That frown wears away when she settles in at home.

Today she told me she was crying because she didn't want to leave her dad's house.

That just makes me feel bad because to others it seems as though maybe I am not creating a good home enviornment for her although, She does call me everytime she is over there visiting to let me know how she is doing.

I feel bad that she cried when it was time for her to leave to come home. I know she just enjoyed her time, and didn't want to leave but I still feel bad.

Is it that awful to come home?

Answer 1

She's probably confused about why you and her father are in different places. She's just not used to it yet. The reason why she doesn't want to go home is because she feels if she leaves now, she might not get to come back

Answer 2

Oh darl, my younger two do that at times when their dad drops them home. (they're 4 & 5)

It's not that they want to stay with him - I worked out that they want him here & they dont want him to leave, just they don't quite know how to express that because they are too upset.

You're doing a fine job darl. She obviously misses you when she's not home.

Please dont feel bad.

Answer 3

She only sees her dad once a month and maybe her dad makes it a great time. Im sure she loves you loads but she doesnt get time to miss you :D

Answer 4

Awww no.  It's hard to be in that position, I know.  My two little guys frequently go to see their dad (they have sleepovers at his house every other week).  Sometimes they will want to stay at dad's or they ask to go over even when he is at work.  They are always excited to see him.  It's not that they are not happy at home - they just love their daddy as much as they love me.

Your concern shows that you care about your daughter and I am sure that you provide a wonderful home for her.  Try not to let her frowns upset you, she is just being three and missing her dad.  You are lucky to have a dad around and involved who obviously makes her very happy!

Answer 5

It is very hard on children when the parents are seperated. She just misses her daddy. Is there a reason why he does not see her that often? My children's father is suppose to have them every other weekend, but that seems to be too much for him. Do not feel bad. Is the father a good guy? Let her call him to talk. Encourage a little more involvement...

Answer 6

I have a 3 year old son who is also sad when he comes back from his dad.  Once a month isn't very often & I'm guessing she just misses him & wishes to see him more.  I believe that is that case with my son who sees his dad every other weekend, but was used to seeing him more often.

She loves you!  She loves being with you...What I have asked my ex is that he let our son know the plan...to let him know what is happening, like I do when it's time for him to see his dad.  I will tell him a day or two before, "On Friday your dad is coming & you'll be with him over the weekend."  

Letting a child know what the plan for the day or the next day gives them a sense of control over their life.  It's entirely possible that when it's time for your daughter to come home, her dad didn't tell her & maybe just said, "ok, time to take you to your mom's."  For her it could be an unexpected announcement and leaves her feeling out of control of her life, sad because she loves her dad but wasn't prepared to end their time together.

Maybe you could ask her father to "prep" her for her return.  It can be as simple as saying, "Well, tomorrow you get to see your mommy again!"  Or in the morning telling her the plan for the day, "We'll have breakfast, play, go for a walk, and after lunch to your mommy's".

It helps!

Good luck & remember, she does love you and her home with you.