My 3 yr old is out of control. He wont listen, he hits and throws horrible fits, im a single mom, any tips?

Question

My 3 yr old is out of control. He wont listen, he hits and throws horrible fits, im a single mom, any tips?

Answer 1

stand your ground and enforce punishment. ive got a lot of respect for you being a single mom i couldnt comprehend how hard that would be. i grew up without a father as do too many kids, but again stand your ground and enforce it!

Answer 2

Don't give in, be tough. You can do it!

Answer 3

when he starts having a fit just say clearly "i will talk to you when you are finished" then just go away or step aside even if you are out, just leave him (staying where he can see you of course!). he will realise you are gone and want to be with you and say again, i will talk to you when you calm down. he will eventually then you get your turn. be persistant :) x

Answer 4

I just got done giving this advice to a similiar question to another mother, so yes, I copied and pasted but it's all very basic but necessary to consider and try:

Here are some suggestions and bear in mind that I'm making these, but not saying that you're not doing them already or not doing a good job.  I'm just listing a few things, because I have unanswered questions about diet and/or disciplinary techniques that haven't been described.

* Diet: don't over do sugars or carbohydrates. Watch the intake of juices (usually juice is high in sugars and just a waste of caloric intake as well).  If you want to use juice, make it yourself from fresh fruit.  When serving fruit, serve fresh fruit verses canned or frozen because of the sugar they are packed in.  

* Discipline: you have to be really consistent and don't threaten anything unless you are really going to do it.  Kids learn real quick and will try to push your buttons quickly.  If you use time out, then don't make it fun for him.  Make him stand in a corner. If he tries to run away, then you may have to stand right behind him.  You'll have to be really stubborn, and not afraid to "break" him of a bad habit or bad behavior.

* Expectations you want from him: like with sitting at playgroup. Play role playing games at home to make it fun and teach him your expectations.  You can act like you're going to play group and you be the little kid...do some things you do in playgroup, then when you play music for singing time start acting up like he does, then say "No, No, I sit.  I sing."  and practice it with him.  Then when playtime comes around, start talking to him about what's to be expected about 5 minutes before going: "We're getting ready for play group.  What are you going to do when we start singing?  You sit and sing." etc

* Pushing/smacking: you need to let him know that this is not accepted at all.  If it's during play group, then take him away from everyone.  You can't just tell him no, and let him continue to have fun and play with the others.  You'll have to put him in time out and then let him go back to playing, after time out warn him that if he pushes or hits another person again, he goes home and does time out and he doesn't get to come back to play group that day.  Then you'll have to stick by your statement and do just that.

* Don't stop rewarding, even if you don't think it's working...it does work.  If you blend rewards with punishments, then they'll get the picture eventually.  One thing I ALWAYS say when I ask or tell my children to do something is, "Thank you."  I also intentionally watch for good behavior and reward it with praises.

The biggest thing, is being very consistent and not giving in when you are disciplining.  Also remember, do not threaten something and not follow through...so don't say something if you are not prepared to actually do it, and don't ask when disciplining: like "do you want to go to time out?"  Don't ask, just punish when necessary.

Sorry to be so long, but these are just general guide lines.

Hope it all helps!

Answer 5

Be consistent. When he misbehaves and you tell him you to stop or you will put him in time out, do it. Time out must be a area where he is safe but there is no outside stimulation, like a tv. Don't cave because you dont want to hear him whine. The child is not in charge and by allowing him to get away with unacceptable behavior he is bullying you into giving him what he wants. If he acts this way towards his own mother, what will he do when he goes out into the world.

Answer 6

Maybe his behavioral issues are tied to the amount of quality time he gets to spend with you and or another adult.  I know that's not something that you can easily change, and I applaud you for being a single mom!  I don't know what your childcare situation is like, but maybe find someone who could spend more quality one on one time with your son who will reinforce your values.  HANG IN THERE!!!

Answer 7

when he does that be tough!

Look at him very firmly and worn him not to do it again, very very seriously.

Hope I helped

Good luck