My 4 1/2 year old keeps messing her pants?

Question

I have tried everything I can think of to get my 4 1/2 year old daughter to stop pooping (and ocasionally peeing) her pants. She'll be fine for a month or two, but then for about 2 weeks she'll just mess herself. I'm so sick of it that she is now wearing pullups (boys ones because she thought the girl ones were cute).

I have tried time out, talking to her, taking away toys/privileges, made her wash her underwear in the sink, smacked her butt. We have been at this for 2 years, since she showed all the signs of being ready to go. At first when it wasn't working I'd just let it go for a while and then try again in a couple of months, but she's going to be starting Kindergarten in the fall and I am sure they won't let her go if she is still crapping her pants. Anyone have any real suggestions?

Answer 1

My now 47 yr old sister did this when she was about that age and my mother said she put her poopie panties in a bucket of water and made her wash the poopie panties out and rinse them in clean water until they where clean and she never did this again..........But if this do not work try letting her wear it for about an hour and see hhow she likes that.............

No kindergarden will not put up with that, and I think your daughter is just being out of control and wanting attention

Have you talked to your dcotor about this

Answer 2

I'm tending to believe it's not the child's fault.  I don't think she can help it, and here's why.

I have a niece (I can't explain this) who is highly sensitive to grapes.  She was at my house, and begging for grapes, so I gave her a few.  Just a few minutes later she messed her pants.  My sister told me not to give her grapes...

TX Mom

Answer 3

She's probably just being stubborn, but just in case take her to a doctor to get this checkout out to make sure there isn;t something physically wrong with her.  (doesn't sound like it, but never hurts to be safe)

She may be craving attention, but there may also be a real psychological reason behind this.  Maybe she is afraid of kindergarten and wants to stay a baby?

Find something she really wants to do (i.e. play dates with a friend, spending the day at the park, dance lessons, etc.) and tell her that it's for big kids and that she can go as soon as she is potty trained.

If none of these fit into your lifestyle or budget, small rewards for each time she goes in the toilet will also work (gold stars on a chart, a piece of candy, etc.)

Kids her age need to be motivated to change... try setting it as a goal towards something positive that she wants.  Punishing her will only diminish her self esteem and make things worse.

Good luck!

Answer 4

she craps in her pants i think it time to have her put back in diapers don't you think i knows 4 and half but has a parent you need to buy some diapers for you daughter i don't think kindergarten is not a good idea if the teacher knows she poops her pants this is a problem my adivce is take her back to daycare and live her there for a day and let the daycare takers change her diaper and her habbits there good luck

Answer 5

I  wouldn't mess about it to much try and tell her calmly that its not good to go poo poo in her pants or what ever you want to say then give a reason ,such as.  When you go to kindergarten they don't want girls that go poo poo in there pants.  I she doesn't get the message within 2 weeks take her on a "field trip" if you will back in time tell her if she doesn't act  like a big girl she wont treat you like a big girl.  Dont let her out of your site, aware baby sitters, teachers ,and anyone that mite take care of her to treat her with the freedom of a 2 year old. As a last resort take her to a doctor you never know it might be a medical problem . My friends little cousin has it.

Answer 6

She is doing that either to get attention or is just too busy for such things as going to the toilet.  Set her on a schedule that will work for you, and make her stay on the toilet until she does her business- no toys, no talking, no tv, no music- and see if you can get to the root of the problem- maybe have a chat with your doctor to make sure there is no physical problems causing this.

Answer 7

I would first take her to the doctor to see what might be happening, and if everything's fine I'd spnak her bare bottom, and make her wear nothing but a diaper around the house and nothing at all if she wants to play outside and make her wet herself, and say you'll stay like this untill you learn how to behave.

Answer 8

Do you have a new baby or pet? Sometimes kids regress to earlier behavior when they are no longer the baby in the family.  She is getting LOTS of attention from his. I tried this with a child and it worked. Sat down and told her that only little kids poo their pants and if she continued to poo her pants she would be treated like a much younger child. It only took a few days of being treated like a two year old (no big girl toys, no big girl tv shows, no play dates, no big girl food treats, etc.) for her to stop. When she whined about this, I reminded her that when she stopped acting like a 2 year old, she would get all the good stuff back. And when she stopped, thats when the attention was piled on her, including a party! This involved no hitting, no yelling and no confrontations. Remember you are bigger, stronger and smarter then she is.