My 4 year old son is a terror what do I do?

Question

My son is 4 and he is very very bad. He is constantly throwing thngs, he won't sleep, he does terrible things o his older sister, and he has gotten in the kitchen drawers and got things to cut my furniture. I have punished him every way I know how and I have no idea what else to do! SOMEONE PLEASE HELP!

Answer 1

Spare the rod...spoil the child.  Forget what Oprah says about not disciplining your child through corporal punishment.  She is not married and has 0 kids.  She should keep her mouth closed on this matter.  It is true that some children will not respond well to corporal punishment but the vast majority do.  Just remember not to go to the extreme.  Never do it when you are angry.  Good luck.

Answer 2

well... i dont think he take you very serious. im not trying to be offencive, im trying to help. i mean.. really, i personally dont thing the time out thing works, i think spanking is a little more down to the point, i am NOT saying go beat your kid. but he needs to learn what good behavior is, and what is not. when he does something wrong, make sure he KNOWS exactly what he did, and if he does it again, the punishment will be worse. but stick to it! dont baby him after. hope i helped, best of luck!

Answer 3

Sounds like he needs a good old fashioned spanking. Forget all that junk about "corporal punishment is cruel...yada yada". No. Spank him. I'm 17 and my mom spanked me as a child. And I'm fine. I don't hate her. I don't hurt small children or animals. I also don't misbehave cause I know that to this day she will still smack me if I need it.

At that age, they'll likely end up forgetting by the time they get a little older unless you do some real damage. I only know that my mom used to spank me because about once a week she tells the stories of the only 3 times she's ever spanked me. I don't remember actually getting spanked.

Answer 4

If you will to bring him and see a children specialist on child behaviour then the answer will be "not to use the cane" sit down and talk to him properly, something like counselling.

I'll just like to suggest to you that use the cane on him and don't waste time and money to look for advices. Maybe, you feel sad or hurt when canning him but that's the best and traditional way of teaching a child.

Answer 5

Change his diet.  Take him off of all sugar and treats and foods with food coloring.  Put him on a bland diet and have his other siblings follow this same diet.  They cannot eat what you do not bring home.  This should help calm him down.

Answer 6

Don't tell that he is bad on front of him.Use SUPER NANNY methods(mbc4channel) it works with every naughty kids!Good luck.

Answer 7

SOrry to sound horrible but

sounds like he needs a stable schedual...i would try a consistant daily routine. so he knows what is going to happen next..bed time should be consistant with a getting ready 4 bed routine so he knows that it is time to sleep! no alterations until he has calmed down.

also look at his diet.. is there food that you notice makes him a lil hyper after eating them ? if so dont give it to him....

and try and spend time just with him without any other children... maybe thats why he does terrible things to his sister.. when the other child/ren are not there talk to him about his behaviour maybe there is a reason.

kitchen: that is terrible i can only suggest moving anything sharp until things get better.

Im a huge fan of timeouts but im not sure that would work 4 u going by what you have said.... the only thing i can say is ignore bad behaviour & award good behaviour.... tell him why you are punishing him & stick to the punishment no matter what happens...

Sorry to go on for ages but i have seen it so many times in childcare atleast at home you can give them a smack if they really need it !!!

GOOD LUCK

Answer 8

According to what I have learned in psychology, people act a certain way because they are getting something from it, whether that be attention or joy or a reward. And, in order to change someone's behavior, you have to punish and reward them according to the behavior and according to what appeals to the child. It sounds like whatever you are doing to punish your son, isn't affecting him in any way. You have to learn what  matters to him. If he values his toys highly, take them away. If he likes watching tv, turn it off and not allow him to watch. If he likes to run around and play, put him in the corner. And, when he behaves well, you have to reward him for the good behavior, like giving him a treat or praising him verbally or taking him to the park. If you, first of all, only point out the bad things he does, he may look at it as negative attention is better than no attention. So he may be acting out to just get your attention. And he also has no reason to behave because he gets no reward for it. Secondly, you have to be consistent in your punishments and rewards, so that he knows what to expect. And yelling empty threats without following through won't matter either. He has learned or will learn that you don't mean it and he can still get away with it.

It's not easy to correct a behavior when a child is already acting up, but stick to it and be strict. You have to let him know who's boss and that you are serious about it. Balance that with your love for your son and I believe things will get better. Don't give up, though, when things get tough. You can do it. :-)

Answer 9

beat it!

Answer 10

beat his a   ss!!!

Answer 11

sock him in the face

seriously you should tie him up and leave him in a corner for 10 minutes and tell him every time he does something bad he will get tied up over and over again

Answer 12

well, talk to him about it, ask him why he does those things...

Answer 13

Have you tried the Nanny!

Anyway he is probably striving for attention. If you work hard hours and don't have time for him he is probably acting out. Also if your having problems in the home he is seeing all that and is acting out. If his dad is not around and does not give him time, this will also make a child angry and he will act out the only way he thinks he can.

Answer 14

You've gotten some good advice so far.These are some of the best tips you'll hear:

Reduce the amount of sugar and soda that is in his diet.  

Small kids have alot of energy. They need a way to use it up. Let your child play hard outside.  Find a playground with a climbing structure. Kick a ball around with him. Teach him how to ride a bike. If he is throwing things....show him when it is appropriate to throw things.  Throw a baseball.  Throw a basketball, etc.  Give him a way to be physical and constructive.

Be consistent. Always act like an adult. If you get childish around him when you are trying to get him to do something one time, and then try to act angry or serious the next time, he will know you aren't serious. Make good eye contact, Hold him firmly in place. Speak firmly. Back up your commands with consequences and actions.  Don't say he will be put in time out....and then change your mind.  You must stick to whatever punishment you promised. Early bed.  No tv. No ice cream.

Make sure you have a nighttime ritual.  Have him pickup toys, take a bath, brush his teeth, read a book and go to sleep.  Do the exact same thing every night.  It will be hard at first, but he will come to depend on it.

Pay more attention to when he acts correctly.  Kids love attention and if his bad behavior gets more attention, he will continue being bad.  Kids want attention....they don't care if it is positive or negative.  Ignore the small stuff.  Don't play into little tantrums.  Praise him every time he does something right.  

He might be competing with his sister for attention.  Give him some of his own "special time".   Let him know that he can get your love and attention without bothering his sister.

Somehow you have given over your adult power to this child. It is time you took it back.

Your son wants your love and attention and needs to know where he fits in.

Answer 15

Analyze your punishments. Are you being being consistent with the type of punishment you are using? Are you following through with "threats" to punish? Trying different punishments without being consistent tends to have negative drawbacks. Pick the punishment (s)  that you feel best suit (s) your child, then stick with it for a week to see how it goes. Consistence is key. Remember to reward good behavior as well. A hug can be considered a reward as well as a confirmation of how good he is being.

Answer 16

take away things from him, lock him in a huge pen or cage-like something, scream at him, CALL SUPER NANNY!

Answer 17

get on the floor when he starts paddying and throwing things and copy his action's. he'll stop doing it trust me

Answer 18

This is the best suggestion I could give to you as a rebellious daughter to my family. Maybe your child has a problem with some things around him. You should talk to him, face to face, heart to heart for you to know what really is his problem. Would you think a 4year old child can do things like that without any reason at all? There must be at least ONE REASON! Don't worry, he'd give in. =)

Answer 19

sell him

Answer 20

I think you need to get to the root cause of his behaviour. He is behaving like this for a reason.

I do not think the answer is to scream & hit him. It sounds as though he is already 'immune' to those kind of tactics and when you have shouted loud & hit hard this time next time it has to be bigger and badder as he took no notice of it the last time! When does it stop...when he's beaten black & blue?

Like a lot of people have suggested, check his diet. Make more time for him, he may be feeling left out, even though you already feel he has your attention all the time.

You could also try and figure out when he is about to kick off and find a way to distract him before it even starts.

Failing all that, you may need to get help and advice from a professional.

Good luck.

Answer 21

Ebay

Answer 22

go to the library and get the book "New Parent Power" by John Rosemond. It is awesome and gives PRACTICAL advice on what to do. Really really works! Good luck.