My 4 year old son...?

Question

My 4 year old son told my mom the other day that "mommy is always mad at me." When my mom told me he said that, I was crushed. I feel like ever since he turned 2 1/2 or 3 that him and I havne't had that good of a relationship. I feel like I am always yelling at him because he NEVER listens, misbehaves a lot, and hasn't grown out of his terrible twos (just has gotten more articulate). I am very concerned and insecure about my son's and my relationship. I dont want him to think that I am always mad at him, that is horrible. But I think that he does frustrate me easily and often, too often. Any advice?

Answer 1

Ignore that first answer, bloody trolls are so annoying.

I'm not a parent so I don't have any real advice to offer you. However I'm sorry you're having trouble; hopefully as he grows up a little he will calm down a bit. Of course you don't want him to think you're always mad; you obviously love him a great deal.

Have you asked your own mum for advice (or can you talk to her about parenting)? What about other family members and friends?

Really wish I had some experience with this that I could share.

Good luck.

Answer 2

It sounds to me like you need to hang around with other four year olds, and do a bit of reading on child development. I think you are expecting too much from him, behaviour he's not capable of. Once you lower your expectations, you should be able to feel a bit calmer. Instead of shouting, count to ten and think "he's only a kid." He's just reacting to you, so if you change your behaviour, it won't be too long before he does the same. Try reading "Children are from Heaven" by John Gray. He's a bit waffly, but the ultimate message is a very helpful one. Positive parenting is more effective than hollering, and much better for your blood pressure ;) We can always learn more about parenting techniques. None of us are perfect!

Answer 3

I really wish I had some wonderful and inspiring advice but I don't other than to say he is four years old, hopefully he will grow out of his rebellious behavior but just make sure you spend the time to sit down and talk with him about things, I mean really that is all you can do, however I have seen this thing advertised on tv late at night that this guy says order my cd or dvd and he says he can fix all problematic children behaviors, anyways contact me if you'd like for me to keep an eye out for the commercial, but even with that though I would still say sitting down with them(children) and talking with them makes all the difference in the world

Answer 4

have one on 1 time and do somethings he likes. my mum when i was around that age every friday she would leave a girf on the table for me (only a little 1) and it showed that she does care. Maybe tri these

Answer 5

There are a few different things that you could try- every child is different will respond differently.

* set CLEAR rules: If he know exactly what he is allowed to do then life will be easier for him.

* Stick to your word: What you say goes- if you say he can't have something then he doesn't get it.

* Praise, Praise, Praise: Congratulate and highlight when he has done something right.

* Set a side some time to be with him doing something that he likes.

* Make sure that you are having some time to yourself to relax and deal with other stresses, so that you are not taking things out on him.

* Tell him that you love him. "Sometimes I get mad at you but I will always love you." You dont want him to move on to thinking that you dont love him.

Good luck with everything. Remember that you are human and he is still very young. If that doesn't help, at least he will be off to school soon.

  

Answer 6

I DO THE SAME THING SOMETIME I CAN FIND MYSELF HOLLERING FOR NOT APPARENT REASON AND I OFTEN SEE HIS TEARY EYES AND HE GETS FRUSTRATED BUT YOU GET LIKE THIS WHEN YOU ARE AROUND THEM 24/7 ITS LIKE YOU HAVE NO MOMMY TIME TO SIT AND THINK ABOUT WHAT YOU JUST DID YOU NEED TO BREATH BEFORE YOU TALK SO THAT EVERYTHING YOU SAY WONT SOUND SO MEAN KIDS TEND TO DO THINGS BUT THEY ARE NOT BAD THINGS ALL THE TIME NOW THAT YOU KNOW THAT YOU DO THIS YOU NEED TO FIGURE OUT WHAT TO DO TO AVOID FROM YELLING CALL HIM SOMETIMES AND KISS HIM AND HUG HIM TELL HIM THAT YOU LOVE HIM AND DO THINGS TOGETHER SO THAT HE CAN SEE ITS NOT ALWAYS YELLING YOU CAN BE CALM AT TIME BUT LET HIM NO WHEN YOU ARE BATHAT'STS WHERE THE YELLING COMES IT WORKS FOR ME TO BE HONEST SOMETIMES I GEFRUSTRATEDED BECAUSE I JUST SIMPLY DONT WANT TO BE BOTHERED

Answer 7

try to understand him.hes only four.he will still grow.and someday you will understand him.:D