My 5 year old boy is always grabbing things, toys etc from my 18 month old girl. He can not seem to control

Question

He's a good kid and usually responds well to time outs etc. This just seems to be one area where he has no self control help!

Answer 1

Hi, it seems to me that your son it's starting to show signs of sibling rivalry.

The age gap between children is thought to have an effect on the strength of sibling rivalry. It's been found that a two- to four-year gap often produces the worst jealousy, while there seems to be less of a problem if the gap's larger (more than five years) or smaller (less than 18 months).

Sometimes the oldest child displays the most jealousy - probably because they had you all to themselves for a period of time.

However, each child is an individual and their behaviour will have its unique characteristics.

Even though some jealousy is normal, it can make children insecure or unhappy and might spoil the relationship between siblings. It makes sense for you to try to manage rivalry whenever possible.

Sibling rivalry sometimes increases with age. Older children may only begin to show annoyance when the baby starts to be mobile and snatches their toys or interfering with their games. And a younger child may be jealous when her big brother or sister starts school.

You may find your children go through stages - they may be great friends at one age, then fall out all the time at another. This is quite normal.

If you think your children will never get along, it's better not to force them together. It might be better to let them have separate friends and activities.

If at all possible each child in a family should have somewhere that is all her own. If space is tight, this could be a drawer or a box - somewhere to keep private treasures.

Avoid making comparisons between your children, especially if one is receiving a lot of praise. This favouritism can make them too competitive, and may cause distress to one child if the other is constantly held up as an example.

Good luck!