My 7 year old son told me he hates me. What should i do?

Question

He has gotten caught lying a few times about small things and he gets in trouble every time. Usually his video games and Tv priveleges are taken away or more depeding on the severity of the situation. Now that its summer he wants to play video games, watch TV, or play computer games all the time. I try to get him to play outside, we have tons of backyard stuff to do, but he would rather stay inside. I have 2 more children under 2 where I cant always go play outside with him, which I would love to do, but can't. For the last couple weeks every time I tell him to turn the TV off or do something that he doesnt reallly want to do, he tells me he wishes he never had me as a mom and that he hates me. As of right now I have taken away every fun thing he could do and he is only allowed to do things when I tell him. I want him to realize that he has it good so when he gets the priveleges back he will appreciate it. Any advice??

Answer 1

he's finding his boundries. there is really no reason you can't play outside with him. put the other two kids in a playpen, or stroller. he wants time with you and is asking in a 7 year old way. i think he probably feels left out of what use to be before those other 2 kids came around. find a babysitter and take him somewhere. have friends over.

Answer 2

Don't pay attention to it he doesn't really mean it. Just rember he loves u and u love him. And if u take away his vieo games and tv he wil only want them more so dont take them away.

Answer 3

Take him to a shelter to volunteer for an evening.  Perhaps this will show him that his life at home is not that bad.  Things can always be worse.

Answer 4

He does not mean it. But over time, as he grows older, this might affect how he views you when he is a rebellious teenager. You might want to get a babysitter every week (once or twice) and then go out to dinner with him or play outside with him... just so that he knows you care.

Good luck!

Answer 5

Call SUPER NANNY!

Answer 6

just tell him that you love him. my children have all tried this and it is a way for them to say they are mad at themselves for getting caught. trust me when I say this won't be the last time they say it.  It will hurt every time, but don't give up or give in, they know you will always love them and this is a way for them to vent.  Just tell them "well I love you honey, how about playing outside." it also sounds like jealousy, if he goes outside and plays then the other two younger kids get you to themselves. he doesn't understand that you love him just as much, all he sees is that you spend more time with them.  This will change, TRUST ME, my children are now 11, 9, 7, and now I am trying to get all of them out of the house just so I have a little time for mommy!!

Answer 7

Never take it personally when a seven year old says he hates you.  Just say, "I know you feel that way now, but it's okay because I love you and always will."

Answer 8

Well not to be rude

my advices are

- let him play with the things he has

- since you are busy with your infants he has nothing but his stuff

- he loves u still but is going under depression because you are not there for him but only shouting at him dont's do's

- try increasing you play time

- when infants are asleep go PLAY..dont rest but play with your son

- take him somewhere make him happy

- the main thing is TALK, LEARN, HAVE happiness :)

P.S. im only 13 not old but if u consider its good then thanks!

Answer 9

Tell him you hate him back.  That will t hrow him off guard.  He is telling you this stuff because he knows it hurts you and he wants to hurt you for taking away his priveledges.  If my mom told me she hated me I would be like "ummm what???" and thats exactly what he will be thinking when you say it.  He will come back out and apologize after awhile and tell you he loves you.  As far as taking away his priveledges when he does something wrong....thats good.  Maybe you should rent a movie that shows how bad some kids have it and make him watch that.  Like about the little boys and girls that live in 3rd world countries who don't have food to eat and live in little adobe houses and have no toys and and not television.  Maybe you should make him watch something like that everytime he gets upset with you.  It's educational and proves your point.  I think those shows come on the discovery channel, learning channel, and the history channel.

Answer 10

7 yr olds r 7 yr olds!! They r

stil learning thingz in LiFe.

I'm pretty sure he doesn't

really mean it wen he tells

u he hates u!!! i luvv my parents

A LOT!!!!! i'm sure he shld feel

the same wayy.....if not thatz

a problemo.

Answer 11

this is why children now a days are soooo rotten.......he needs a good a$$ whoopin that will straighten him out

Answer 12

maybe you should take away the video games and tv permanatly.  he will forget about it in a few months and he'll develope better hobbies.

maybe every night you could read to all of them part of a book before they go to bed, so h**l be interested in learning to read.

i think he just needs attention from you and i think he's also bored.  try to think of some other things you can all do together...maybe you can set the table together for dinner.

plus, reading is good for him, and maybe he'll read about something more fun and healthy to do with his time. :)

Answer 13

Well, I don't know if this will make you feel any better, but it actually a GOOD thing that your son is expressing his anger.

Holding it in & suppressing it to the point of violent rages is bad. Granted, he is not expressing it in the most positive of ways.

Pick a time when the 2 of you are not in the middle of a conflict, and discuss with him calmly how words hurt, and although he may HATE what you are asking him to DO sometimes, he needs to stop and think and realize how he doesn't really HATE MOMMY.... and saying so hurts.

Tell him an example, like how you hate when he doesn't play nicely with the babies, but you would NEVER hate him because he is your son and you love him very much, no matter what.

Answer 14

It's just a phase. He'll say anything to make you feel bad and give him his priveleges back. As for the showing him he has it good you should definitly talk to him about it and tell him how some kids dn't have half the things he has.

Answer 15

tell him your going to wal-mart to buy a new game and leave him there until he starts crying for you then come and say you said you hate me

Answer 16

WOW, he is a bit out of control for 7!! Don't tell him to turn off the TV you do it.. As for video games and computer don't let him get on them you are mom you are the boss not him, if he does not like it and does not go out to play he can sit in his room with nothing at all to do..

Answer 17

children always love you no matter what. make him feel like the best child in the world.

Answer 18

He dosnt mean it.

Every kid has told their parent they hate them if they dont get their way.

Let him know it is unnacceptible to use the word hate, and use diffrent words. have him explain why he is mad. I understand and agree with you taking away his things but,Instead of taking everything away, try just sending him to his room. Your the boss, not him.

good luck

Answer 19

THe tv,comp games,and so on,are exactly why he hates you.They are no good for ppl in general!If I were you i would get rid of those things asap.He won't understand that he has it good unless you explain it to him.You don't have to tell him to play outside.HE is old enough to help you in the house.It's a matter of discipline.Give him a choice between 2 things to do.Make the easier one the one you prefer him to do jusst then.He needs to learn how to respect you as the mom.Tell him who's boss.Who pays the bills(explain them to him first)In order for him to respect you ,u must keep your word.If you set a limit with consequences,make sure you don't 4get it.Theres a good book on this;Dare To Discipline  by Dr. James Dobson

Answer 20

he is doing a guilt trip.. he is trying to make u feel srry for restricting him from certain things .. if he is watching tv and u tell him turn it off and if he says no or ignores u then dont hesitate just say it calm not angry just say ur grounded for 24 hours. then he says he hates u then just say another 24 hours and every disrespectful thing he does or says is just another day added wen i was kid thats wat my mom did to me and ive gotten to 2 months after that i never disrespected her again. and for wen he gets older and starts to get in fights at school or any other magor bad things happen then do bootcamp grounding were for all day he hase to clean the house spotless

Answer 21

When ever my 6yr old son says that I just tell him That I am sorry that he hates me because I love him very much.  He is saying it to upset you.  If you dont get upset then he doesnt get his payoff.  I Sounds to me like you are doing everything right.   Good luck!!

Answer 22

he sould learn ur in charge and what u say goes...he should learn to have respact for you...

Answer 23

my grandson says that to me sometimes i dont take alot of notice tell him to shut up and he stops it,

Answer 24

Pop him in the mouth for talking to you in such a disrespectful way.

Answer 25

You do what's best for your child whether it makes them "hate you" or not, though typically when a child says that what they mean is "I'm mad."  I'd set very strict rules about what time your son can use electronic media, and stick to them.  If he's rude to you and says "I hate you," you can say "well, I'm sorry you feel that way.  I still love you" -- and stick by your rules.  If he continues being rude, I'd send him off to be by himself until he's ready to be polite.

Answer 26

forget about it hes a kid and doesnt understand the word hate its good you took away the TV because thats most likley where he heard it

Answer 27

Doing the right thing dont give up...

Answer 28

if its just small lye's then just talk to him oh and the hate is just s phase

Answer 29

ask if he has problems with his buddies orif he feels lonley try not to be so hard on him  try to take it easey if u need more advice add me and i know how to help i delt with this before and do u know wat websites he goes on or try to get along with him more

Answer 30

Give him a lecture on how lucky he is to have everything that he has. Reading books that have a lesson and talking to him about it also works. Would have been better to to the book thing when they were younger but better late than never. Another thing to do is to tell him that you are taking away his privileges because it is for his own good and there are lots of better and fun things to do other than playing video games.

Answer 31

Don't worry it's what all kids say to their parents. It's really no big deal espesially if he is just 7. Just try to convince him that it would be more fun to play outside. play with your other kids outside and show him how much funyou are having. Or have some family fun time and go to your local YMCA or ice rink. That will convince him that it is more fun to get out of the house.