My 9 yr old daughter has a real bad attitude with me lately she can't talk to me with out being crabbit?

Question

I have taken all treats off her and told her that she will not get them back untill her behaviour inporves please someone help me Im pulling my hair out here

Answer 1

Perhaps your spoiling her to much?

Maybe its something in school, talk to her, see if perhaps she's getting bullied?

You could introduce grounding or smacking, if shes cheeky threaten her with a smack (on the bottom), and if she continues actually smack her, she'll end up hating you for a few hours but will settle down, after getting smacked she'll thing "I don't want to be smacked again, so I better be nice"

Answer 2

Take her to Africa. Take her to see the people who are suffering, and like go into a township and hand out food and bottled water. She will see how much people are suffering, and she'll get that its not all about her.

Its truly the best thing to do.

Good luck :)

Answer 3

LAREDO, all children in my family are subject to getting disciplined by any adult in the family. If you had a child that were in my custody you better believe I would smack it if it got out of line, regardless of your empty threats.

You don't have to agree with me or my methods, to each his own, but you won't catch my children being disrespectful and unruly.

would talk to her and let her know that I will not tolerate her nasty little attitude. If it does not improve the next time she lets that attitude out, I would slap her. It will shock her and she will definitely know that you mean business.

Answer 4

please dont smack ur child... i dont care how bad she is, and it doesnt work anyway... try talking to her... and, altho i sure you cant bring her to africa, there are plenty of places you can bring her around here to spend time with her and do something that matters together... i.e. packing boxes of food for the underprivledged and such... also, taking all of her things away will just cause her to be bitter toward you. i agree that a lot of it has to do with hormones, and where those are involved, i dont think theres much you can do. you can try talking to her pediatrician and see if they have any coping ideas. but the best thing to do is get her away from all her friends and bad influences for awhile, and just spend some time together and talk. try to find out something she wants to do thats appropriate (going to the zoo or somthing) and spend time together... hope this helps

Answer 5

SECOND EDIT:  Babyluv, my point was not discipline but the method.  Children have a well padded place to spank and it's called a butt.  People would be nuts to entrust you with the care of their child if they knew you slapped them in the mouth.  I don't care if it "runs in the family" or not.  If I ever tell a person they would regret something, it's not an empty threat and has never been.  I follow through, by whatever means necessary, to correct the problem.  My children have never been "smart mouths," they were always permitted to discuss whatever problem they had in a civil manner and we agreed on a resolution.  They have the right to be heard.  They are now adults and still love and respect me.  Neither of them has ever been arrested or used alcohol or drugs and each has stable marriages and well-paying jobs.  I must have done something right.

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EDIT:

  Babyluv if you ever slapped one of my children, you'd never want to slap another child.  Who gave you the authority to slap anyone's children; even your own?  You could, and should, be sent to jail; that's child abuse.

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

Six months ago you posted a question about your 9 year-old being crabby.  It's obvious that the problem doesn't lie with the child but with her mother.  Is she blaming you for something that has happened in her life, like a divorce, separation, absent father, or for showing favoritism to her siblings?  Is there something about you that embarrasses her or is she not proud of her own appearance, like maybe being obese?

You need to get to the root cause.  An obese child will be crabby because they don't feel good about their appearance and are hurting emotionally.  To have someone say something to them about it, hurts them deeply and they begin to develop a hateful attitude as a way of protecting themselves from the pain.  Other problems can cause the same reaction.

I don't think it has one thing to do with her hormones, but more to do with her home life.  That's just my opinion.

Answer 6

she's prolly already spoiled. & more than likely she may be influenced by the children around her at school & at play. girls are so intense lol trust me it will pass. hope i helped, even a little!

Answer 7

Hormones. its normal at that age.  Her hormones are kicking in, you will notice her physical changes as well.   Its very normal at this age.  I call it the PMS that lasts for 2 years before the period begins.  

I have three daughters and been there.  Hang in there.