My 9year old doesn't listen to me at all!!! Please help!!?

Question

Everytime I tell him to do something, He yells and stomps and screams!! I don't know what to do anymore. I've tried everything. He also hits his sisters around and I am always telling him to never hit a girl. I don't understand why he acts like this. I have tried everything I can think of. What do I do????

Answer 1

Put him in time-out, even if you think he's too old for it. He's carrying on like a baby, you can treat him like one. And when he hits his sisters, you don't tell him just not to hit a girl. You put that kid in time-out and say sternly "We do NOT hit." He acts like this because you let him get away with it. And no matter what you try I can guarantee you it won't work perfectly the first time you do it. Just be patient and consistent stick to a form of discipline (time out), and make sure he understands that if he misbehaves there will be consequences, and pretty soon he'll stop misbehaving.

Answer 2

I taught my boys from early on never EVER to hit a girl, but they occasionally hit there older sister, but she 8 and there 4 and 5 and she attention seeker. So she will come up to you even if they squeeze her hand wrong. (even though i think she deserves it) She like angelica. From the Ruggrats. :P But you have to stop this behavior right now. Because in a couple of years he will be in middle school then a grown man.

This is what i suggest.

If he hits his sister you give him a warning pop and tell him not to do it again. That it is never right to hit a girl.

The pop really gets his attention. Like mom serious! Then after the first pop if he does it again you give him the death eye. Like if you don't stop doing that you will get another popping.

Then start taking things away from him. Like his cable. Then his T.v. Don't hit him again though. :P Just take things away when he has tamp trums. If he stomps his feet. Tell him to march his feet into his room and if he starts to cry tell him to go cry in his room. The point of time out is to isolate a child and not give him attention. Thats what you want to do. You want to show him that your not going to tolerate his behavior any longer. Don't give any rewards in tell you see a drastic change in his behavior, and if he is being bad at the table tell him no desert and let everyone else have cake. or w/e, and just send him into his room.

It sounds cruel but its better then having him beat other little girls in school or him acting up when he grows older.  

Answer 3

I know, corporal punishment is bad, Bad, BAD, Really BAD, Horrendous and a million other things but by God it works.

I was spanked as a child and was not out of control.  Ditto my brother.  My female sibling was not and she is useless as a human being or any subcategory there of.  My children were spanked as needed and they were never out of control.  My grand kids are being raised the same way and they aren't out of control.  My female sibling has two children.  They are a member of the "Time Out" crowd.  Both of her kids are hellions.  She has a daughter who will NOT respond to her in any way and if I hadn't caught that little brat she would be dead.  She was running into the street while her mother was calmly saying, "Please stop, please stop, please stop).  I told her she better get some control.  All my children are adults, half with spouses and children of their own and all four would stop dead in their tracks if I shouted for them to do so.

You better control of this child.  The activities you are describing are things I used to have to deal with when working with young people.

BTW:  Before someone puts me on a spit and starts turning me over an open fire; a "Spanking" and a "Beating" are NOT the same thing.

Answer 4

So why hasn't he been taught discipline?  It sounds like he has been taught to hit...maybe he has been "spanked"?  Is he allowed to play video games any time he wants and for as long as he wants?  Is his time playing these games monitored?  Are the games he plays monitored?  What does he do on the computer and is that time monitored and supervised?  Yelling, stomping and screaming are indications that puberty isn't far behind.  Since you were the one who says you've tried everything that tells me that there has been no consistent discipline.  Discipline needs to be consistent, the same time after time after time.  Switching it constantly isn't going to do any good and after awhile you get a child who is violent and mean.  

Answer 5

Heres what you can try.. First get him to settle down  because you want to talk to him.. with patience and love. . you look straight into his eyes and ask  him. son whats the matter? why are you so angry all the time ..?/let him know you are here for him if he needs to talk. instead of  hollering at him  . when you ask him to do something tell him you will help to.. do it together slow and maybe he will start doing it himself.. if he does praise him in a positive way...good luck.