My Bf has a problem, and I can't stand it or should I say, help it... ?

Question

Ive been w/ him for 3 years now, and he's always had this problem of getting hard, and then once he puts the condom on it gets all soft and wobbly and its such a turn off. I pretty much just please myself before seeing him because being with him is such a tease. He is so sweet and perfect in every way, except for the bedroom. I pretend like everthing is fine and that it doesn't matter if he can't get it back up, just so I wont hurt his manhood. I feel really bad about myself sometimes, i wear s**y linegerie for that very reason. I work out a lot so I can look good for him, but i feel like I don't turn him on enough. I'm not trying to sound conceited because I hate conceited people but I get a lot of attention from guys and I get asked out daily and sometimes I feel like "trying" out other people, but then thats really trashy and dishonest, I like to stay faithful to a person, but it is so hard when my man doesn't please me. Ive never cheated, but i'm getting so sexually frustrated. I can please myself, but sometimes you just need that manly touch. <sighs> I don't ever want to hurt his feelings, but how can we fix this? Is there something I can do? I feel bad, like I can't turn him on enough :(

Answer 1

slip him a viagra that should do the trick

Answer 2

is the rubber on too tight? cuts off blood flow if it is and gets &quot;soft&quot;  

Answer 3

What is very sad here, Suzi, is that his problem can be fixed with a simple trip to his family doctor.  This is a correctable health issue, and many men have it.

What many men don&#039;t have is a woman like you, and I consider that to be downright criminal!

Answer 4

Your problem is common but the cure is a bit more difficult because to find out exactly

what is wrong requires more investigation that this site is capable of rendering.  People

here can only ponder.

The causes of such a disorder are numerous.  To further the issue his case might contain

more than one cause.  Believe it or not one of the biggest problems which effects millions

of Americans is Circumcision.

Yeap.  Unfortunately it is very likely that he is cut rather than intact. The process is done

here as males are young.  Too young for them to ever even consider that they have a problem.

Each male’s wound is slightly different.  Some males have more problems than do others, but

one thing is clear, they all suffer greatly from it, and simple cannot recall a time when it was

any different.  A famous actor Ben Affleck actually had his f******n removed as an adult.

Due to some sort of accident on stage.  Doctors elected to circumcise rather than repair his

injury.  In this case you have a male who knew what it was like to have one, and then lost it.

The result.  Total devastation.  The f******n represents 75% of a males member.  Its not just

a snip.

However, this is by far only the tip of the iceberg.  If he is nervous or upset it can have the

same effect on him.  One other aspect of this problem is that the United States seems to

rank highest in the world for this problem.  He could have religious conflicts that he may

be hiding.  Religion in America runs so deep it actually functions like a disease in some

cases.

Other problems can result in wait time. Erections are time sensitive.  They last a bit of time

then go down then return.  Try taking more time.  Also Viagra acts to relax muscles so that

a hard on can be produced.  Is he relaxed ?

Other areas can include Physiological attributes.  I knew a boy who had strict parents and

always told him he was not clean and such.  He suffered greatly by torment from his past.

Viagra can help.  It is unfortunate but he lives in a rather difficult society.  America is not

kind to males.  We strip them of their manhood at birth then ridicule them when they

m********e and tell them lies about going blind.

I was not born her so I have mine intact, and I jerked off all the time as a 5 year old.  In America

boys have no f******n and so never learn this till later in life.  One thing for sure.  My parents knew

I whacked off and did not mind it a bit.   They did tell me to stop doing it where people could see.

The stress of being male in the U.S. is beyond reality.

To be accurate the only way to determine his problem is to seek a doctor.  I know this is not

a desired thing, and it is just adding to the stress.  Believe me..  He knows he has a problem.

You don’t need to say much.  Viagra while it might help, could just be placing a bandage on

a wound that could otherwise be corrected for.   While you might get any number of different

answers each may contain variations of what I include here.  

If you love him, help him relax…  Work on it as a team.  If he is cut there is also restoration,

but this returns only limited help and is an advanced and lengthy process.  Still many men

write about great success after restoration.  Years ago it was unheard of.  Today it’s the most

popular thing going on under the covers.  It is important to consider all aspects of this problem.

Many people in this country have never seen a natural male member or could even tell you what

its like to have one.

Rest assured he is not alone, and there is of course help.

Answer 5

I really think you should talk to him. He might have erectile dysfunction -- it is a common medical issue. You&#039;ve probably seen all of the commercials. There are medicines a doctor could prescribe.  

Answer 6

tell him to go to the doc, but u sound like a good gf if u do all that for him

Answer 7

Perhaps you should ask him to go get checked out for erectile dysfunction. Explain to him that your lack of sexual satisfaction is driving a wedge in your relationship. If you are as faithful and honest as you claim, you should have no problem discussing this with him.

If I were him, I would want to know if there were a &quot;problem&quot; so I might be able to correct it.

You do not have to tell him that you have thought about being with other men, just explain to him that it would mean a lot to you if he were to look into correcting this.

Answer 8

The best way to fix this is to massage him and tell him he has nothing to worry about when he&#039;s around you. It&#039;s possible that he may be nervous and it&#039;s getting the best of him. The body doesn&#039;t react to things like arousal normally if extremely nervous or worried. By reassuring him and massaging him, this will cause his body and mind to relax, thus possibly allowing him to get erect. Try putting the condom on for him so that your touch will keep him erect. Many men worry about going soft while putting on the condom and taking too long putting it on. If you just be patient with him and keep reassuring and touching him, the nervousness will fade away and he should be fine. If not, try taking him to the doctor and see if it&#039;s a medical condition. Hope this helps.

Answer 9

He is losing something in the transition of putting on the condom.  Help him out...you put it on for him...use your mouth on him while he puts it on.  Use your imagination ! :-)  Good luck!

Answer 10

He probably has ED, its possible. But I don&#039;t think you should break up with him or cheat on him, because that will break his heart, and also hurt yourself in the process by doing so.

And another thing you can do is get some better condoms?

Not sure about that but, maybe more fore-play and oral s*x between you two instead of intercourse?

Then during this time you can figure out how to help your mate.

Answer 11

talk to him about it. he might have a problem. and try new and different things to get him hard. like maybe give him a lapdance and things like that. try new things and see if that works

Answer 12

How old is he?  Maybe he has erectile disfunction or maybe he just gets nervous.  Have you tried going on birth control so he doesn&#039;t have to wear a condom.  Maybe its just the condom thing he don&#039;t like.  I&#039;ve had a guy like that, if you wanted him to put a condom on, he&#039;d go limp, but without one he was ok.  Maybe you should try putting the condom on him instead of him having to.  Maybe talk dirty to him and put it on.  Or get a female condom so he don&#039;t have to worry bout putting it on him.  Try different stuff.  There is pills to fix that problem too.   Good luck.

Answer 13

suzie its because im g*y

Answer 14

try giving him a ******** it works all the time trust me

Answer 15

Along with the other things listed, it could be an aversion to the condoms. He may be used to pleasing himself as well- without a condom. If he has had bareback s*x in the past (with no condom) then that would also be two problems- risky, and he would be accustomed to not wearing one and it would turn him off to put one on.

Answer 16

have you tried viagra

that gets you hard fast