My Boyfriend of four years cheated on me.I am unable to get over the pain.This pain is unbearable.Help!?

Question

He was chatting with his old college friend who is married and has a 5 year old kid.I just happened to go through the transcripts accidentally and they were intimate.His behaviour has changed a lot. He still says it was nothing,he loves me but i can sense wrong.I cant live without him. I feel like killing myself. I am in graet pain.This pain doesnt go.Nothing seems good or pretty.HELP PLEASE I AM SINKING.

Answer 1

The pain indicates lack of real love which is giving. It's actually needing love, which God can take away and show you what real love is.

Answer 2

For me, this kind of depression was caused by my feeling I didn't have an alternative.  I sense that you feel the same way ("I can't live without him").  Yes, I know - food doesn't have any taste, colors don't seem bright, there's like a grayish tinge over everything.

The cure was realizing that I had an alternative.  Once you realize that you could attract someone else, that you could have another successful relationship, you will feel much better.  You can!

Answer 3

You love him too much and that is why you are over possessive. It is a good quality and bad also. Depends on how the other person percieves it. You have two options. Either to believe him and trust him and go ahead with him or leave him for ever. Choice is totally yours. You can never be sure whether what he is saying is true or not.

Answer 4

Try to focus on your own health for awhile. Such as walking for 45 minutes. Eating green vegetables. Certain foods can lift your mood (spinach, fish, Brazil nuts or in some people, almonds. It can also help you to go on message boards and share with other girls and women who have been through similar experiences. You will get better over time.

Answer 5

Meh, I'd say blame yourself for assuming it.

Answer 6

Simply forget and find a new friend  

Answer 7

You mention "boy friend" Still you adore him as a frined in your inner of inner hearts. Observe the trees around you   How green they are. they grow live and cherish their existance with great love for the surrounding. A tree is an ideal friend and it dies, perishes into granuels and burns itself into coal under pressure of the surface and finally emerges as glittering diamond! Take a lesson from this.  A LADY IS DEFINIELY SUCH A GREAT CREATION OF GOD --Straightaway forget the past Start a new life of your own for others.  

Answer 8

get a better one ,

Answer 9

At the moment, you’re a little overwhelmed with conflicting emotions. Your pain is on two counts -

One, because of your romantic love for the guy, so you “can’t live without him”. Two, because of your moral outrage where you “sense wrong” but “he still says it was nothing”.

You need to evaluate your feelings objectively, and make a decision here – will you stay with the guy or leave him?

Every relationship has its ups and downs. If your feelings are as deep as you say, and he feels the same, you might take his word for it, forgive him and put the matter behind you.  You might also, with mutual agreement, set some boundaries for the future.

But if you feel he’s completely lost your trust, and you’re sure he’s cheating and then lying to you about it, walking away may be best for your own peace of mind, because he’s unlikely to change. Presently you’re suffering reaction. It will subside so hang in there.  Remember time does heal the pain, and you can indeed love again.