My Dad Just passed away....?

Question

Hello everyone I am having some issues I guess My dad just passed away a few days ago and I am trying o get everything in order for the funeral and all.... I could have swore I saw him in my room last night and when I reached for him my hand got cold and he was gone ....... I really miss him and I saw him a day before he passed and I remember getting steaks and cooking them for him and watching movies and having a good time ..... I just want to know when the pain will go away.?............When will I stop seeing him every where ? ....... Not only did I loose my dad I lost my best friend.............. Thanks for you answers in advance....

Answer 1

im so sorry for your loss. i lost my dad 2 years ago on march 16th... i no exactly what your going through.. it takes time for you to go through the grieving process, i no for me it still feels like it was yesterday i can remember every single detail and everything that happened. just try and keep your self occupied with other things and friends. im so so sorry, your in my prayers!  

Answer 2

Firstly I am very sorry for your loss.

Losing you dad is very painful. I lost my dad (he was only 57) to cancer 3yrs ago, I will be honest that the pain never goes away, it just gets less intense. I still have dreams (in the dream) thinking he is still alive, but knowing that is not true, but hold out for hope in the dream, only to be disappointed when I awake.

You say you saw him in your room, this may have been him, some eastern religions (eg; Buddhist) believe the presence of the spirit stays for a up to 10 days. We were in the hospice when my father took his last breathe, about 5mins later (the bunch of roses on the side table) one of the rose stems cut completely at the top leaving the rose flower to fall to the floor, this was amazing, it was a rose for my mum. The day of the funeral (10days later) the winds came up, even the funeral director said she felt his presence, and the winds changed throughout my speech (when I referred to my father and his bond with nature) to the crowd of friends (we held ceremony outdoors). Even his dog sat by the cask the whole time.

The presence and 'sightings' or feelings of your father will surely be most strongest now at this time, over the next few weeks. Take note, keep a diary and write down your dreams and experiences, this may help you in your grief.

This experience you have is entirely yours, though I encourage you to share it with your close family (mum, siblings) as they too may have similar experience.  

It seems like you are taking control to organise the funeral celebration.ceremony, make sure you take time to reflect on your special moments with your father, and what this means to you moving forward - never to forget.

Answer 3

im really sorry......

but WOW... i could totally relate to you

my dad passed away less than a month ago b/c of cancer

and i can remember EVERYTHING...

you did probably see him and its because hes worried about you

im actually 14 years old

and ive been having a lot of dreams about him...

everyone told me its b/c hes worried and sad that he left us and hes coming to you every night

i feel a lot of pain as well... and i read that this pain will go away in 1 1/2 - 2 years or more

ii really miss my dad and i regret arguing with him and yelling at him when i got frustrated like other teenagers )=

i wish i could've been better to him ..

youll probably stop seeing him after your pain goes away because then, he'lll know that your happy and yea

just think of it as your dad is on a vacation and you'll see him one day

and dont worry time goes fastt

thats what i did :)

Answer 4

Firstly i'm really sorry to hear that. I've had a few relatives die in my lifetime, and it is hard to get used to them being gone. But even though they aren't physically there, they will always be watching over you. You need to remember the good times (like the steaks and dvds) to keep a happy memory alive. I don't think the pain will ever go away completely but since it's only been a few days you haven't been through all the stages of the grieving process. You will one day, but for now you need to be strong, because if you can see him, you know he is always there for you. Try talking to him to, because he can hear you :)

Hope you are okay.

Answer 5

Im sorry for your loss, I remember i was probly like 16 my moms child hood family friend / sorta her brother past away and everywere my mom went the power would go out, like should would be on the computer and it would shut off, she would go to the store the power would go off and at his own funeral the room he was in the lights were flickering the whole time, i remember my mom went to his grave and talked to him and pretty much told him to lay at rest everything would be okay and after that non of these weird things happen again.

Answer 6

Hey there, I am so very sorry, but I can relate to your pain, I lost my father about 3 years ago to lung cancer, about a week before my 17th birthday. The pain will eventually subside, and you will move on with your life, but don't ever forget your father! He will always be in your heart! Your lucky to see him everywhere! I have never dreamt or seen my father since his passing. Don't worry, it will be ok, trust me, I have been there!

Answer 7

god bless you your dad your friend and your family. the seeing you dad thing...... you seeing him because he is there. it might be like that for a few years.. or a few weeks or months depends on him.... i think. i will pray for you and you family and dad.

Answer 8

I really believe your story cuz when some of my cats died, they came to see me after their deaths. I think they loved me. Your dad will always stay with you!

Answer 9

i dont know what your believe, but ppl say he will comeback and visit when he just passed away (like your case) wanted to see how you doing and all. It happen to me with my grandfather.

its paranormal i guess, but it do happen.

Just give yourself sometime to heal and grieve and in the same time keep yourself busy and meet more people

Answer 10

Sorry to hear of his passing. Shock is usually what  sets in first and then denial. Grieving is a due process. It can take months. It can be so you dont feel much and then it hits you. Each person is different.  Dont think of him dieing think of him when he was living.

Answer 11

I am so sorry that your dad and best friend died recently.  Right now the pain and loss is almost unbearable but time heals all wounds.

Just know that he has gone to a better place and he is happy.  It is those that he left behind that are hurting not him.

It depends on the individual as to how long it will take you not to cry every day and think about him all the time.  It should start getting easier within a few months.

God gave us memories.  Remember the good times you shared together  He lived a long life and you have stored up many memories.  His death only took a second.  He was alive one second and gone the next second.  So remember the many memories you have of him and don't concentrate on the one second.  

In a year or less, you will be able to think of him and laugh at something you remember that he said or did.  Or you might want to talk to him like you do something either good or bad and say "I did good daddy".  Or "I messed up daddy but I will fix it".  One thing for sure is that you will never forget him.

Blessings

Answer 12

First of all I am so sorry...

I know what it's like to lose someone close to you, but I cant imagine being in your shoes.

The grieving process takes time, the first 18months are about the hardest... there are several stages, they really have no order, and you may repeat them... there's no "one way" to handle something like what you're going through. You will have to find the peace within yourself. I personally am a Christian, so I draw strength from Jesus. I cry out to Him, I asked for Him to comfort me, to carry me through the pain, to sustain me, to give me peace.

There's alot of things to do during the viewing and funeral preparation stages, it's a VERY stressful time, there's like a blurry haze over some things, and others will remain VERY vivid...

I'm going to pray for you that God will help you and give you a peace in your heart that passes all understanding...

There's no real way to answer this... it seems as though you've lost a man of great magnitude...

You have my sympathy...

Answer 13

Hey..my deepest sorry for the loss. As some1 have said the spirit of our loved ones do come and visit us before they depart forever. My mom said spirit will be around us for about 40days(Im dont have proof on tht)

When the loss is so sudden it will be even more difficult to grasp the fact i know..My grandpa(god bless) was not ill when he passed away..till date i feel tht he s still living.

Time is the healer...let out ur emotions if u feel like. Slowly u ll get over it and move on. Focus on ur work and time flies. Will pray for ur strength to pass thru this..

Answer 14

The pain may not go away but it will be less frequent. My father lost both his parents but he has sons, a daughter, a wife, several granddaughters, and 2 grandsons which helps him ease the pain. If you have loved ones in your life to help ease the pain, then you should expect some of the pain to gradually decrease. Of course there is no exact time frame for when your time of bereavement will end so it's hard to say. As long as you live your life the way he would have wanted you to then you'll begin to deal with your father's death a lot easier. However, if you live the rest of your life as if your father just died then you'll never get over it. Just live your life and everything should fall into place.  

Answer 15

my condolences to u.. i know the feeling i lost my father few years ago and i still miss him dearly.. the pain is great at first because we miss them and we remember them in every way  possible.. i do believe u when u say u see him here and there.. he was ur father and ur friend,... he still is with u and will always be with u.. every day the goes by u will realize that u will have him in ur heart for ever.. dont be afraid to talk about him or express ur feelings .. talk to him as if he was there with u.. dont supress what u feel.. he will always be part of ur life.. i still miss my dad every day and there are days i remember him more..say a prayer for him.. that will help him and u.. good luck

Answer 16

hey... firstly i am so so so sorry to hear of your loss. this same thing happened to my boyfriend a few years ago and he was a mess. do u believe in spiritual energy? because your dad might be trying to talk to u still... maybe he wants your company too. u guys sound like u are very close so that is prob y ur seeing him everywhere....

Answer 17

embrace he will always be with you. your pain may never go away, but will subside in time. managed it by knowing how lucky you've been and remembering those who have never had a father. forever peace in your heart.  I 'm so sorry for your loss  .  peace be with you

Answer 18

I'm very, very sorry.

It's not easy losing a loved one, I'm sure you're going to hear that many times.

There isn't a date that the pain will go away, it'll take time.

Write down all of your memories with him so you never forget him, and slowly, try to let go.

There are many kids out there just like you and you can find many websites online for children who lost a family member.

Best wishes to you and your family.

Answer 19

God Bless you my dear.  You will always miss him, but the pain will get a little easier.  My dad died 4 years ago and I still have moments that I just break down because I miss him so much. But I can deal a little better. Time will heal. You need to grieve like that, cry and scream and break down, it is part of the process. I will pray for you.

Answer 20

That's something that really takes time, and its different for everyone.    

    When my grandfather passed away from stomach cancer in 2003 (I was 13) I lost the only man that I've ever loved as a father-figure. I would have vivid dreams of spending time with him that were so real I would wake up crying because I didn't want to wake up. Than, my aunt,who was my biggest fan, passed away from complications of breast cancer. The next year the pastor of the church I grew up in, who was like an uncle to me, died in an accident at work. My Great uncle died from heart disease in 2006.  

     The best advice I can give is to take up something to get your mind off of it. Take the good memories, keep them sacred, and remind yourself that they would want you to make the most of the life that you have left. Unfortunately, the thing that took my mind off all my loved ones dying had become taking care of my mother who had become a raging alcoholic since my grandfather's death, but thats another story lol

I can't honestly say that the pain will ever go away, there are times when my eyes well up when I think about how he would have loved to see what what music Im listening to (i introduced him to punk lol) or how my aunt and uncle would let me give them plastic food and pretend it was real when I was 5 or or my pastor would always have something funny, sarcastic, and true to say.

    Maybe It's all about learning to function without that person in your life. I am not sure that this will work for you, but I just reminded myself that I never took them for granted, was there for them, and will always remember all of the good and bad times we had together.

    Hold onto that memory you have but let go of the future, as odd as it sounds. Thats what I've had to tell myself. You just gotta get by, day to day. Hang in there! :)

Answer 21

I'm really sorry buddy.

I wish I could truly and honestly tell you when it will stop hurting, but it's different for everyone.

Sometimes the pain just doesn't go away, especially for someone so close. Seeing him is just a reminder he's still there for you, and always will be.

I'm not a psychic and I don't have much faith, but I believe loved ones are always there no matter if their alive or passed.

I bet he can see how upset you are and wishes he could cheer you up.

I've lost quite a few people as well. I know how bad it hurts.

Do what I do. Write a letter. It doesn't matter if its a word, or pages upon pages. Just write him a letter about something. Tell him how much you miss him, how you feel, or memories you share.

He'll read it.

I understand and I give you my apologies. I really don't know what to say. I feel really upset when others do and I try my best to help. I hope I did in someway.  

Answer 22

Talk, talk, talk about it.  Sign yourself up for grief counseling through your school or work (it is usually provided, ask around.)  Talk to your friends about it, talk to your family about it, every time you think about him, talk about him.  

The very worst thing you can do is keep it inside- it will destroy you.  Over time, you will begin to adjust to your life without him, and if you have an open dialogue with the people around you, you will always feel like you have a support system.  

Your father would want you to get back on your feet and be a happy person again!  Do things for him- in his memory.  Do things for yourself that you know he would have wanted to do for you.  That is the best way to honor him and keep him alive in your heart.