My Daughter doesn't want to go to preschool this year?

Question

My Daughter is 4. Last year I enrolled her in a local preschool, she went and liked it alot. But I have enrolled her this year also, and now she cries and tells me that she doesn't want to go now. Is it right for me to keep her home this year and help her with her learning myself or should I just send her anyways?

Answer 1

Sit her down and talk to her. Does she have a different teacher then last year? Are hare friends from last year in a different class? These can effect a four year old. If these are true tell her she can still see her friends and her old teacher.

Answer 2

If this started after she returned to the preschool there may be issues at the preschool that are different this year and affect her personally.  These could range from a bully or a new more popular student who put her down to a less friendly teacher.  It could be as well that changes in home life have caused some insecurities.  I would not necessarily follow your daughter's wishes but I would listen to what she is saying and determine what has caused the change.  If there are issues at the school that have changed her opinion of it you may wish to consider an alternative pre-school.  If there are issues at home that are stressing her you might consider volunteering an hour or so at the school so that you continue to play a role in her activities as she transitions.  There is nothing wrong with you keeping her home and providing your own learning activities.  Indeed, if you feel capable that may be preferred.  But if you choose to do that do also find some social activities for her to participate.  Bottom line, you need to find out what has caused the change in her attitude and then engage in practices that will encourage her in the transition to school life.  Not wanting to go to school leads to a child which finds learning undesirable.  Whatever choice you make, be sure to enact it in a way that reinvigorates her desire to learn.

Answer 3

Take her to school yourself and stay nearby for a while; she will either settle down or continue to be upset. Also it is important to rule out any issues with the teacher or another student. Kids rarely explain why they feel a certain way so you need to do some detective work. She might be being picked on by another student or the teacher might scare her for some reason; either way, find out.

Answer 4

maybe she wants something new. what about enrlling her in a new preschool. maybe she doesnt lik this one. tell her to just try.

Answer 5

Maybe your daughter wants to spend more time with you. No need to rush her this year. You'll most likely be sending her off to school fulltime in a year or two anyway. Enjoy your time with her.

You can visit the library together and get books that'll introduce the alphabet & reading. There are books about simple math, science, other lands. Ask your librarian if you want suggestions.

Here's a good website for suggestions about doing preschool at home:

http://www.universalpreschool.com/how-to...

Does your community have preschool park playgroups?  Your daughter could practice being around other kids there, or at church if your family goes. Scroll down this page to the links to find a moms club near you:

http://www.momsclub.org/links.html

I'm the parent of two teens, and I suggest you cherish your time together with your daughter.

Answer 6

Who's the parent here?  She's four years old. Get her little hinny into school. It's doesn't matter what she does or doesn't want to do.

Once she gets started she get to like it again.  You questions show that you are thinking that YOU want her at home because you miss her when she is gone. But it's best for her and THAT is what matters.

Her education and getting her in the right mind-set for going to school for the next 12 years will be good for her. It can set the tone for the studying right and learning quickly. These informative years can set her mind positive for input.  The interaction she gets now will also allow her to make new friends easier and get along with everyone.

Get her to preschool.

Answer 7

she probably is fearing that she is going to miss you.

i think that's so adorable;

what you can try is:

placing a small note in her lunch that say something like,

dear _____,

i hope you are having fun at school. i love you!

love mommy.

my daughter loved when i slipped that in her lunch box, it put a smile on her face everytime and reminded her that i still loved her. just tell your daughter; everything will be fine if you act like a big girl. just listen to your teachers and have fun! you are going to do some really fun things!

good luck mommy!

Answer 8

Ohh!!tsk..tsk...find her sourse of motivation....its not good if your child will stop..........

Answer 9

Well i think that you should sit down and ask her why she doesn't want to go maybe you could figure out a compromise

Answer 10

Maybe you could find a good babysitter.

Answer 11

What ever you do in this situation, don't sit her down to discuss it. She isn't the parent or the adult in this situation, you are. If you give her everything she wants now, she'll be the same way later in life.

My question to you... Have you gotten everything you wanted in life?

You are setting her up for disappointment if you keep her home at this point in her life.

The way a child grows at her age is through social and cognitive development. If you keep her with you she's not getting the interaction with other children her own age and this can stunt her growth later down the road, when she's school-aged.

She'll also miss out on various activities meant for her to grow in her large and small motor skills. Such as running, balancing, playing outside on the playground. She'll also miss out on art projects that get her cognitive abilities to grow.

I know it's tough for the both of you, but it's a situation where she will respond in a few weeks. Remember your first day of school each year? Did you want to  go?

Give her at least two weeks to get used to her new classroom, teacher, and classmates. I promise she'll have more good times, than bad.

Answer 12

I think you need to send her anyway. She enjoyed it last year so she will this year too. I think she probably got used to having the summer off. She may have seperation issues but it would be best if she was back in preschool. Makes it easier for next year and kindergarten.

Answer 13

You need to ask her why she doesn't want to go. If she doesn't have a good reason then send her anyway. If she does then take care of her reason the adjust accordingly. .

Pre-School is not just about book learning it's also about learning how to interact with others and you can't teach that at home.

Answer 14

Send her anyway. She needs to learn what the schools are teaching. No matter how good the kids are, they don't always listen to their parents. And why would she want to learn how to sing her ABCs if she could watch Sesame Street or whatever instead. She also needs to learn that she can't just not go to school if she doesn't want to. If you let her stay home this year, she'll always remember you doing that, no matter how young she is. And then in future years she will think that if she cries and whines forever then she won't have to go to school. You might as well deal with it now instead of some years.

Answer 15

If so that might be because there might have been some trouble there like bullying or teasing maybe she didnt like the lunch or it mostly could have been because she had night mares in nap times? It could have mostly been the fact that she had a bullying problem or learning there was to hard for her talk to her teacher and ask her what have you been teaching them and the activities or if not ask your duaghter yourself of why she doesnt want to go if it is because of a medical or something physical then go to the doctor for help.

Answer 16

Has something changed in the recent past that has allowed her to be near you more often during the day?  Any major life events?  I find that my kiddos at school have a hard time coming to school when big 'stuff' has happened in their lives.  I've had little ones who don't want to come for reasons like, new pet at home, family visiting, or just self conscious about a new skill they're working on.  I think it's important for your daughter to continue her peer relationships and have exposure to all the "fun" of being in preschool...dramatic play, music and movement, playground activity, etc.  If you can provide her with some small group acitivities with neighborhood kids, you may be able to keep her home and still expose her to that awesome early development:)

The good news is, you care, and you have options to make it work.  Good luck!

Answer 17

It DEF is tuff.... But praise her for going. That is what I did this past year with my 4 year old.... tell her that mommy need sto go to work to get money to buy her new toys so that way she starts going and will make lots of new friends and it really is for the best to get them ready for Kindergarten. They have a lot of requirements to even get your child into Kindergarten now so i HIGHLY recomend it. Good luck!

Answer 18

I would send her.

My daughter also started preschool this year (for the first time) and she's almost 4 yr old.  I have been told that children this age "practice" controlling the situation.  This was explained to me because my daughter (who would load herself into my car exhausted, sweaty, with that exstatic "I just got off the BEST rollercoaster ride!" look plastered on her face) would tell me every day how someone had pushed her, pulled her hair, tripped her, called her ugly names, how she had cried SOOOO hard for such a LONGGG time, and BEG me to not send her the next day.  She had me so confused about how school was going that I made it to the classroom door first the next morning to confront her teacher.  Before I could even greet the teacher, my child had run off to play.  Her teacher was confused about what I was even asking her.  Once she understood my question, she explained the control issue thing.  I felt like the biggest push-over, but now that my eyes are open I'm picking my battles and letting her win some.

Answer 19

send her n e ways, but just tellher taht its just like last year

Answer 20

Send her. She's just getting older and more aware of what "going away" from home means. If you keep her home she will most likely display the same feeling next year anyway. She will get over it.

Answer 21

It can go either way.  If she will sit with you and let you teach her then keep her home.  (mine won't but does great at school)  If her protests are small and end when she's at school then send her.  My son did the same thing and I told the teacher   She asked him personally why he didnt like school anymore and he for some reason never complained again.  I don't know what his answere was.