My Grandma is suffering in a Nursing home WHat do I DO...

Question

My grandma has been there for me since I was a baby when I feel that my familt is against me she would be the one to comfort me and always agree with me. She is in a nuring home now and is 79. Every time I see her i cry and I am a pretty strong person. I want to make the last years, months, weeks, days of her life the best what do I do?

Answer 1

visit her as often as you possibly can.

Answer 2

Spend as much time with her as you can.  

Answer 3

By all means return the love she gave you so many yrs. ago & was always there for you when you needed her.  Now it's her time to be in need, & you can repay her by showing her the love she so freely gave to you.  Please don't ignore this, & go see her as much as  you can.  You might just be the bright spot she needs badly in her live today.  One thing we can never have enuf of or give enuf of is our love.  There are no doubt any number of reasons you cry when you see her, but I feel the more you visit her, the less you'll feel the need to cry.  Know you are just giving back to her what she so freely gave to you as a child.  It w/mean so much to her, & it w/mean a lot to you after she's gone that at least you did the very best you could do for her.  Just go & visit w/her, & if her mind is OK, you could reminise about when you were growing up.  Older folks love to relive the happy moments of their lives.  Share your love w/her, & really make her day full & happy.  This is the very least you can do for her while making yourself feel good in return.  And yes, some pictures also wold be great to leave w/her to look at while ou're not there.  They'll serve as a comfort to her & she can relive many happy moments...Best to you both...:)

Answer 4

Just visit her as much as you possibly can and make sure she knows exactly how you feel about her.  If there is anything you've ever wanted to say to her that you havent, say it now.  Don't leave anything unsaid.  Let her know how much she means to you and how much you love and appreciate her.  You'll not regret leaving anything undone when she's gone.  Just be there for her as much as you can.

Answer 5

i agree . try and bring her home if you can .  there is help out there .

I'll will say a prayer for both of you .

Answer 6

It's difficult to see someone close to you come close to an end. Im talking real, due to her age she may not live for long, and you have to get used to the fact that she may not live long. The reason your grandma is in a nursing home is because she is taken care of, she is given care that is not provided to her at her own home. If you want to do this for her you have the right to take her home, regardless of what the rest of your family says. Stand strong and fight the tide. If I was in your situation I would never let either my grandma, mom, or dad be in a nursing home. If it was up to me I would take care of them myself. One of the last thing I would want is for myself to being in a nursing home far away from my family. I would hate it, but if my family would put me in a nursing home I guess I would have no choice. If you want to take care of your grandma and do everything that the nursing home does for her, take your grandma home and take care of her. Fight the tide.

Answer 7

If she is suffering take her home. no one in a nursing home is gonna show her as muh luv and affection as her own family. even through the pain, the thing the elderly care about the most is knowing that they are loved and that someone still cares for them. many feel neglected at times.my granny recently died and there was comfort in knowing i did little things to show her i cared. I made sure to tell her i loved her and bought her favorite foods which made her smile. We may love the elderly but in society there is a culture in which we they are treated like second class citizens. Show your grandma the same love she showed to you as a child. Visit her and have conversations w/ her even when she doesnt respond much.Try to remember her favorite foods and bring them for her(leave out spicy foods). Tell her about your life. Trust me nothing will make her happier than knowing you are happy. I hope your grandmas last years are great.w/ a grand daughter who cares so much i am sure they will be will.

Answer 8

That's great that you want to do that for her.  My advice is to have a day out of the week that you can go visit her.  Go every week, it's something she'll look for to.  Bring her a card, candy or some kind of small gift.  She'll be glad she can show them to her friends.  If she likes old music or movies, hook her up w/ a tv or radio and get her some dvds or cds she can listen to.  Always drop in unexpectedly.  (Not on your usual day)  to make sure the nursing home staff is not just preparing things for your visit.  You want to catch them unprepared so you can make sure they are treating your grandma correctly.  If she's able to get out, occassionally take her out for dinner, or to a park for a picnic.  She'll enjoy visiting with you and simple gestures the most.  God bless!

Answer 9

Let her come stay with you. Thats what I would do. If I could change some of the ways I acted before my grandmommie passed away-I would. I thought, "O, I'll go see her next week...well guess what-next week didn't come.  Make the best of your time now while you can.

Answer 10

I'm assuming your grandma is in a nursing home because you or your parents couldnt take care of her at home. My papa was in a nursing home he passed away last sept. Nursing homes can be bad, but just check out your grandma when you visit and make sure the nurses do their job the right way and arent to rough. Just visit her and talk, play games and keep her company.

Answer 11

Take her in to live with you if she is able to, or just visit often and bring her things that make her happy. Make her feel important and loved. That's what matters most. Let her know how much she matters to you. Like one day bring in movies and her favorite food and have a 'movie day' or give her a makeover. Make her feel special. She will never forget it and neither will you.

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Answer 12

Take some photos of when you were happy together and look at them together.  That should bring back happy memories of the good times you had and make your time with her alway happy.  When you visit take little things that you know that she likes.  When she's happy you'll leave feeling good for seeing her.

Answer 13

Take pictures to preserve the memories.

Visit her often.

Take her things that make her happy.

(eg. Foods, books, etc...)

Take other family members and friends with you to visit.

Develop the pictures, frame some & take them to her for her room.

Best wishes

Answer 14

Try to learn to schedule your tears for when you leave, unless she is sad and crying and you just need to cry together.  If she is able to visit and enjoy your company then do whatever you think might make her enjoy the visit.  Play cards, sit and visit.  Tell her what's going on in your life and sincerely ask her advice about different things.  Let her know you value her love for you and her wisdom.  You want her to feel that being with her is a delight and something you treasure for whatever time you have left, not something that brings you down.  That even though she is in a nursing home, she is still giving you strength.  Bring her a simple rose from time to time.  Have a slender vase in her room just for you and always keep something fresh in it.  Bring her a small serving of something homemade that she likes or a box of candy she can share with the staff.  The staff often treats patients better when there is a  loving family member visiting and being watchful yet friendly (sad but true).  I know because I had the same thing happened  to me and my grandma.  Give her lots of love and touching.

Answer 15

If you are responsible for her care and able to get her out of there then great, otherwise, I would say visit her as often as possible, and get to know the nurses... they'll treat her better if they know theres a family member who is involved and interested, and willing to treat them with respect.

I used to be a CNA, I would know.  

Answer 16

ok so its obvious you're close to your grandma, and eventually every person has an ending on this earth, so every time you see her don't cry because if she sees you she will feel bad, i heard that the smallest things make them happy, when you come maybe you could bring food, or a board game, or anything that will help you two bond, and if she ever passes away, you still have to be strong because it's better for her to be up in heaven then here on earth suffering...just try bonding with her, spending time with her they love when you listen to their stories