My Teenage Son?? Am I Being to s****.??

Question

All my children are attending a Prep school, but my teenage son who is sixteen has started hanging out with this girl who goes to a public school, Don't get me wrong I am not trying to be a snob i was raised on my fathers teaching salary and went to a public school and married a guy from a Prep school. But I know my son and he usually doesn't hang out with kids out side of his school besides friends of the family but while we were at our summer house in Key West he met this wonderful girl who was visiting relatives and lives in the same town as us. I thought it was just going to be a summer fling, but when we came home he still saw her and now all he does is stuff with her abandoning his friends, I heard a conversation with my son and one of his friends from school and his friend was saying stuff like, "yea public school girls are always easier to get some from" and well other stuff along those lines, so I'm worried is my son just in it so he can "get some" or is this real.

I have asked my son about this but he always tells me he really likes her a lot, but after that disturbing conversation I heard I just don't know what to think.

My son has never been a trouble maker, but I'm so worried he was my first born and my baby.

Am I being naive?? What should I do??

Answer 1

I don't think I'd freak out or panic, but you do need to let him know he needs to equally balance his social calendar to do some things with "the guys" a little more often and not shut himself off exclusively to her. If it doesn't work out between them then he's going to need those buddies behind him. If he ignores them now because of her they aren't going to wait around and will feel pushed out.

You could probably also ease your mind about anything with s*x by reinforcing what you would like him to do but then realize he may or may not abide by that.  If he knows what your expectations are and how you feel he may take it into consideration as long as your not forcing down his throat.

Answer 2

how about give him the s*x talk. tell him that if he has s*x he is 50% for safe s*x and that if she get pregnant and decides to keep it she can order him to pay child support.

and while your at time make sure he know every little thing about s*x. and how to protect himself

Answer 3

I don't think you have anything to worry about. Just because she goes to a public school does NOT mean she is "easy". The coversation between the boys was probably just "guy talk". I think you need to evaluate who your son's friends are. It's good that you had a s*x talk with your son. However, you need to know he is a teenager with raging hormones. He probably just has a little crush on the girl.

Just remember, just because he goes to a prep school, doesn't mean there are not girls at his school that aren't "easy". If he was just trying to have s*x, he wouldn't have to waste his time with a precious girl.

I hope this helps! :)

Answer 4

is he getting into trouble? doing any thing that would warrant you telling him he can't hang out with this girl? if he likes her and his behavior towards you hasn't changed then how can you tell him he can't be friends with anyone. just make sure you have the s*x talk with him and keep an eye on him you don't want to tell him he can't be friends with her because that will just push him away from you.

Answer 5

i think you should sit back and watch. closely. are you open to him having s*x this young? (im not myself, but thats me) if you are not, monitor where he goes with her. have set rules. bedroom door stays open, only visiting when parents are home etc. it might not work, if they are determined there are ways, but at least you know you did what you could.

i wouldn't worry about the public school thing- girls are the same everywhere. just becuase she goes to a public school doesn't mean anything. this all could be for nothing. she could be a respectful girl with great morals that could teach your son something that he wouldn't have known otherwise, that is what relationships and accquaintes are for.

i wouldn't forbid it-that will push him away and make him want to do it even more.  

Answer 6

There is nothing wrong with your son dating a girl who goes to public school. I went to a private school and a public school and heard guys say that private school girls are easy. That doesn't mean that either public or private schooled girls are- it just means that a lot of guys are pigs. (Not all, though. My husband isn't and never was like that.) I HAVE however, seen more prep schooled s***s then public schooled ones.

It all depends on how your son views women. Hopefully you and your husband raised your son to have good standards and to value women. You might want to see what your husband has said about girls to your son though- no offense or anything. I've just seen husbands who say piggish things about girls to their sons and keep that talk away from their wives.

Edit: That's good that your husband respects women. My husband is the same way. I wasn't meaning to attack you or anything(please don't think that I was), I was just stating the fact that sometimes boys get that idea from their dads.

Answer 7

Honestly, I've found (working in both public and prep schools) that the public school kids actually have more of a moral fiber than the prep school kids because while the prep school parents hover over education (usually only when there's a problem), they're not there for the day to day issues that kids face. Every school has its own problems--prep school kids just tend to have more money to spend on these problems. If you are a great parent (and it sounds like you are), you need to trust that you've taught your son what he needs to know to make good decisions. It's important for kids to experience everything possible, and if spending time with people from other schools helps him to do that, just know that he's a more well rounded individual.  

Answer 8

As a mother of a teenaged daughter who goes to public school, I'm amused and annoyed at the same time. And for the same reasons!

Reason No. 1:

Mom, don't you know that teenage boys are always posturing about how macho they are, and admitting to any kind of softer emotion is verboten?  Your son has been seeing this girl for several months and he's probably feeling some strong emotions, but doesn't want to admit it to his friends and get ribbed about it.  Thus the whole "public school girls are easier to get some" talk.  

Reason No. 2.

I hate to say this, but if you're not a snob about public school, you've certainly enrolled your child in a private school that has that kind of snobbish atmosphere.

Reason No. 3.

Instead of going to your son and getting  the straight scoop, you're worrying.  Go talk to him, be upfront and let him know, "hey, I heard that conversation, and you should know that if you really feel that way about public school kids, you're doing yourself and the girl a disservice, not to mention dissing your own mother.  What's going on?"

Straightforward communication is much better than wondering and worrying.

  

Answer 9

you think you're being a snob?

omg it sounds like your son is the one with the attitude problem

"easier to get some from"

wtf kind of attitude is that?

you should stop worrying so much about your attitude and start worrying about doing something to check his, before he seriously hurts that girl, just because she attends "public school" doesn't mean she deserves to get used for s*x by your son

seriously, thats messed up

Answer 10

At first I was thinking that you were wrong to feel like public school girls aren't as good as prep school girls.  My twins will go to public school and my hubby and I aren't rich...

but I am extremely disturbed by HIS attitude that he thinks that public school girls are easy and he sounds like he's trying to "get laid."

That makes me angry as a mother of daughters!

I think HE and his friends are being s****. if this is indeed his attitude and I would work hard on trying to get him to have better values.

Then again, maybe I'm a woman thinking of it from a woman's perspective and also a mother of GIRLS... lol

I should run this by my husband and see what he thinks.  He'll probably come out with something like:

That's funny, I always thought the Catholic Schoolgirls were the easy ones.  lol

Men are such dirty pigs, aren't they.

Gah!  OMG I am NOT looking forward to the teenage years.