My best friend and I love each other, and we're both females. Is it wrong? I can't let her go!?

Question

She is my new bestie. I've known her for two and a half month. I love her...i really, really love her. But I think it's really wrong. Please help! Can I ask an advise?

Answer 1

there is nothing wrong with love. if you love each other then u love each other.

Answer 2

follow your heart. be honest. ask her if she feels the same. but, make sure it's not going to leave ya'all in an awkward place!

Answer 3

there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. I was once in your shoes. I know exactly how you feel. just follow your heart and see what happens. maybe talk about it to your friend. she is really is your friend then she wont judge you for it and if she does feel the same way then thats great. it could be the beggining of a great relationship. doesnt even have to be physical.

I just really hope that for your sake that your situation doesnt turn out like mine did.

read the newest entry on my livejournal. it explains it a little bit...

http://totallymusikmad.livejournal.com/#...

Answer 4

ask her nd if u both really love each other then go out

Answer 5

its fine.

good luck

Answer 6

i think it's wrong, but ask you to listen to the voice deep inside you. i'm sure you'll get the right answer.

Answer 7

Cant say much about this. But as much i can say is that you yourself are best judge of you and it is you who can decide that is it right or wrong. As for me its completely normal to feel for another person.

Answer 8

YOur a lesbienn if you love her love her but if you lover as a mate ,as your best freind then you will just be good freinds foreever  

Answer 9

It's fine.  

Answer 10

i dont think its wrong i agree with same s*x relationships but how old are you???

Answer 11

are you sexually attracted to her?

its fine...

Answer 12

There is nothing wrong with the way you feel. She is obviously very special. I hope that she feels the same way about you. All the best.

Answer 13

specializing in L*****n and g*y studies. Some of her acclaimed books include Queering India: Same-s*x Love and Eroticism in Indian Culture and Society (2002), Love’s Rite: Same-s*x Marriage in India and the West (2005), and Gandhi’s Tiger and Sita’s Smile: Essays on Gender, Sexuality and Culture (2005).

In this interview she answers questions about the representation of LGBT issues in the English media, mainstream cinema, Indian literature and the women’s movement.

Meena Kandasamy: The pride parades in Bangalore, New Delhi and Kolkata have garnered a fair share of media representation. How do you view this development?

Ruth Vanita: This is not a new development as far as the Indian national media in English is concerned, as they have been largely positive and sympathetic towards LGBT issues. They covered the early protests by ABVA and others in a supportive way and have also been instrumental in bringing same-s*x suicides and weddings to public attention over the last three decades. If the Indian language media has also reported the pride parades sympathetically, that is a great development.

Meena: A historic moment for lesbianism in India was the Deepa Mehta film Fire and the frenzy it evoked from Hindu right-wing fundamentalists. How do you, in your experience as a scholar on sexuality in India, perceive their allegation that same-s*x love is ‘foreign’ to Indian culture?

Ruth: As Same-s*x Love in India: Readings from Literature and History (2000), co-edited by Saleem Kidwai and me, has unequivocally demonstrated, same-s*x love and sexual relationships have been represented and discussed in Indian literatures for at least two millennia. We collected translated texts from 15 Indian languages written over a period of 2000 years, which depict same-s*x relationships. The attitudes range from disapproval to non-judgmental depiction to celebration, and the languages include Sanskrit, Tamil, Marathi, Gujarati, Hindi, Bengali. So the myth that homosexuality is a Western import has been laid to rest although some people may still be in denial about it. An updated edition of this book will appear from Penguin India this November.

Meena: How do you find mainstream Indian cinema’s depiction of the LGBT community? Transgenders are almost always mocked or shown as ridiculous; homosexuality has become a butt of jokes in films like Kal Ho Naa Ho; and lesbianism seems to be something that does not figure in their imagination (even in Love Story 2050, Harman Baweja wants to take rebirth as man for the only reason that he can love a woman, because in his understanding, if he were a woman he cannot love another woman).

Ruth: My Brother Nikhil depicted a g*y male relationship with sensitivity, and was well received. Also, Hindi cinema, by depicting close male friends as inseparable and willing to live and die together (e.g. songs like “Yeh Dosti” in Sholay) has provided a space for non-heterosexual relationships to be seen as exclusive, even primary. In my book, Gandhi’s Tiger and Sita’s Smile (Yoda Press, 2006) I wrote an essay on this kind of depiction of exclusive, primary, male-male relationships in the films Dosti and Tamanna. Tamanna also depicted the hijra community very positively, as saving the life of a girl child from her wealthy, upper caste, biological father who wants to kill her. In numerous films, cross-dressing scenes, where a woman dresses as a man and sings and dances with another woman, are highly suggestive of lesbianism. More importantly, as both I and film studies scholar Shohini Ghosh have argued, Hindi cinema’s celebration of love as socially defiant and the most important element of life (think of the long cinematic history of depicting positively intercaste, interclass and inter-regional love such as widow remarriage etc.) has helped the public imagination become more sympathetic to disapproved kinds of love. It is not coincidental that Indian pride parades have used the film song line “Pyar kiya to darna kya” (from Mughal-e Azam) as a slogan.

Meena: From Chennai to Chattisgarh, there has been an alarming increase in the number of L*****n and g*y suicides in India, and these have been taking place in the backdrop of the pride parades. Do you feel these people are pushed to their deaths in the same manner in which inter-caste, inter-religious lovers are? Is homophobia indicative of the Indian society’s general unwillingness to accept people who are breaching conventional and sanctioned social codes (of caste/ religion/ gender)?

Ruth: In my book Love’s Rite: Same-s*x Marriage in India and the West (Penguin India, 2005), I analyse in detail the legal, political, social and historical dimensions of both the couple suicides and the same-s*x weddings that have been reported from all over the country over the last 30 years. There is no evidence that the frequency has increased; rather, it is the reporting that has increased. Yes, the opposition that same-s*x lovers face is basical

Answer 14

It's fine!!! Go for it, tell her how you feel about her before she falls for someone else.

Answer 15

love knows no limits...who cares if shes a girl...heck boys find that very attractive and kinky...

Answer 16

^_^ well, my friends hooked up (both girls) they're happy.

^_^ but does she like u back? and if u go wit her, nothing lasts forever to be blunt. but, i think u shuld go for it, "you dont know what u got, til its gone."

Answer 17

yuck!!!!!!!!

Answer 18

Dear Friend,

I have read,it made me think for a while.What is the opposite of male,it is female.What is the opposite of Cow it is OX.Cow does not mate with cow ..right?So god has initiallly created a man and a female,but not man for man and female for female.I telling this just to make you think.

You have the right to love your fellow beings,your parents,your friends.But it should all be in a very natural way in a very helpful and lovable way.

From what you had written i can make out that in your sense you know what you are doing or what you like to do is wrong.It's really wrong dear.Let she be your best friend always ,you can love her always but in a very friendly manner.Not in any other sense.

Think that girl is your best friend and you will love and help her in your life.But when you marry it should be only a BOY.O.K

God bless you

Answer 19

It okay ask her out