My best friend is in a crazy situation, and I need help trying to give her advice on her problem, please help?

Question

My best friend has been with her boyfriend for almost 9 years, he is worthless, treats her and everyone around him like c**p, does drugs, etc.. She is a great person, and waits on him hand and foot and puts up with all the **** he throws at her, because he has her convinced that no one else would want her. Well a couple of weeks ago she decided to go out to the club with my brother (who she has known, and liked for about 12 years, but they were both too shy to say anything) well for 3 weeks she was the happiest i've ever seen her(and i'm not saying that because he's my bro) I just loved seeing her happy, Well she finally broke down and told her boyfriend about everything, and she told him that she doesn't really care for him like she use to, yet now he has her convinced to pack up her whole life and move to S.C to try to start over. She is going to do it just to see if there's anything there or not, but in the meantime she's killing the other guy (my brother) because she's telling him that she Loves him and for him to believe in her. I think she should just be done, but she feels like she has to give him one more chance so that her heart can be at peace if she does decide to leave him. Does any one have any advice that might help convince her that 9 years of second chances is enough, and that she shouldn't try to change her current bf into the other guy, when he's standing right there waiting and wanting to be there for her and treat her the way she should be treated. If anyone listens to music, there's a song by- Default called "you can count on me" that explains the whole situation, perfectly, Someone please help!!!!

Answer 1

Unfortunatly you will have to sit back and watch her make a big mistake.  There is a reason she would allow someone to treat her like cr*p...she dosent have much self love or confidence.  That is gonna takke time for her to learn.  All your begging is gonna fall on deaf ears and if she dosent change her own self esteem issues she will fall right back into another unhealthy relatinshsip.  You are a great friend to care so much...but its just out of your hands.  

Answer 2

sick poor person, with time sorrow and pitty for you will overcome the feeling of shame that I was so blind about you. Never will you have anything of me again. Pitty at most, what a loser.

Answer 3

I don't know why we women are so dumb, we let men treat us like dirt then feel like we owe them love and loyalty. Maybe if our ancensters said" hey I'm better than that" women today wouldn't be so stupid. Tell her to take control of her own life and she doesn't need a jerk in her life.

Answer 4

SHE NEEDS TO GET AWAY FROM THAT GUY!!!

HE IS ISOLATING HER by having her move away!

Tell her, if he is worth anything... and worth salvaging the relationship he should be able to do it where they are living now... you can't runaway from problems... and location WILL NOT make a difference... might actually make it worse... unless she knows people in S.C.

If she doesnt know anyone there... he wins.  He will be all that she has.. and it sounds like thats the way he likes it...

You need to do the best you can to convince her to stay... whether for your brother or not...

Answer 5

ask her to picture herself with one of them and see who shed be more happy with she doesnt need to take hi c**p shes better and if shes stays with that jerk i bet you she will turn L*****n or sumthin ask her if its really worth it and if she gets anything out of it  

Answer 6

Well if she has been with him for 9 months then she should know he is never going to change  and if she gets with your bro then how is that going to effect yall's relationship? thats a hard one to answere