Question:

My bf and me adopted a baby even tho our familys are against it?

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me and my bf are getting married in 3 months and we wanted to adopt a baby even tho both our familys are against it....and we adopted twins but nobody else knows about it...i know we have to tell them sometime but how do we tell them without them getting even madder for doing it before we told them? plz help?!?!?

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  1. Why don't the people on Answers read other peoples' answers??  Dozens of people have replied to this fake post with encouraging words, and it makes THEM look like idots, not the poster (she did a good job of that herself).  Geez, go get two points somewhere else!


  2. Are you speaking of your sisters twines?

    They will all come around, every one loves  babies especially some one else's  .I don't see why they would be upset  unless you choose out side of your own race .

    .But you are adults and it is your choice .Time to stand up for your selves as a united front.

    Congratulations with the wedding and adoptions !

    Elaine

  3. Why are they mad?  You did a great thing.  I think you should tell them, how long can you keep them a secret anyway.  Perhaps it will help if you explain your reasons and let them meet the children.

  4. Wow .. I am surprised you got to adopt without being married .. normally a "couple" cant adopt with no ties ..

    I have friends that were single and got turned down, then got married and had their own ...

    I guess take the babies for a visit! Introduction first hand .. what can they say?

    Good Luck

  5. Tell them, and they still against it and get mad and act like they dont want to talk to you, then its their loss to miss out on two beautiful gran children. So hopefully they learn to respect your decisions good or bad.

  6. Hmm, for some reason I find this post very difficult to believe. Adoption is a long process, usually requiring letters of reference from friends and family during the homestudy. Also, not that many states allow unmarried couples to adopt jointly.  Lastly, adoptive parents tend to be somewhat well educated and your writing suggests...otherwise.

    How on Earth did you manage to secretly adopt twins?

  7. This sounds like a story to me. For a few diferent reasons. You don't sound old enough to adopt. Some states allow unmarried people to adopt but they must have been together for quite a few years. It cost lots and lots of money to adopt. And I find it unlikely that your family wouldn"t know as in the adoption process they ask for so many references and even if they didn't talk to your parents then I am sure another family member or friend would have told them. And if you are mature enough to adopt then you would not have hid this from your parents. You don't need their approval or permission but telling them in advance is the adult thing to do.

  8. If they really care they will cool down them selves

  9. Adoption is a wonderful thing. you are a great person for doing so and don't let your family make you feel as if you have done soemthing wrong. Just tell them you and the kids  needed time to adjust before you dealt with the impending anger you knew was coming. Always remember this is about what is best for you and those kids not what your family wants.

  10. FIrst of all it was your decision, not your families! If they can't understand the problem lies within them and not you and your bf. Congratulations and best of luck.

  11. i understand what you did but i think you should have waited till you were married.  You have to tell them sooner or later and sooner is better.  What ever you do, make sure you don't regret it in the future!

  12. JUST GET THEM ALL TOGETHER ,AND TELL THEM YOU HAVE SOMEBODYS FOR THEM TO MEET.HAVE LIKE A LITTE GET TOGETHER.AND JUST LET THEM KNOW THAT THEY MAY NOT LIKE WHAT YOU AND YOUR BF HAVE DONE. THAT NOW THIS TWO BABIES ARE PART OF OUR FAMILY NOW. SOMEBODY IS GOING TO GET MAD,BUT IF THEY LOVE YOU THEY WILL GET OVER IT. BECAUSE I KNOW ONE THIS IF YOU GIVE A GRANDPARNET A BABY THEIR HEART USSUALLY MELT.AND THEY CAN GET OVER THE MADDNESS FASTER. JUST LET THEM KNOW THAT IF THEY WANT TO BE INTO THESE BABIES LIFES THEN THEY HAVE TOO GET OVER THE MADDNESS AND BE VERY GLAD THAT YOU GIVE 2 BABIES A NEW LIFE. JUST LET THEM KNOW YOU ARE NOT TRYING TO HURT THEM OR MAKE THEM MAD.THAT YOU AND YOUR BF WANT THIS BEAUTIUL BABIES.STRICK TO YOU GUNS AND JUST LET THE ONES THAT ARE MAD JUST BE MAD AND SOMER OR LATER THEY WILL COME AROUND. BECAUSE IF YOU DON'T TELL THEM SOME,SOMEBODY WILL SEE YOU WITH THE TWINS AND SOMEBODY WILL TELL. SO GOOD LUCK,KEEP UP YOUR CHIN. I'M VERY PROUD OF YOU BOTH.I.M ADOPTED AND MY FAMILY WAS NOT TO  HAPPY ABOUT THE ADOPTED ME,BUT AFTER ALITTLE TIME EVERYBODY WAS HAPPEN ABOUT THE NEW PERSON IN THEIR LIVES.

  13. First of all...I hope you two are old enough (at least 25) and have the money to support the TWINS. More importantly, you have enough time to raise the kids.

    Tell them that you want to give these kids a better life and want to be a family with the them. GOD BLESS.

    *EDIT* EVERYONE READ THIS, SHE IS LYING! >> http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...

  14. I'm sure they will be elated if you brought the babies to their houses to meet their new grandparents

  15. The babies are there, don't hide it. Tell them you are so happy.... I have found it is hard to stay mad and say I told you so when there is a cute little baby looking up at you....and you have 2 to use as your weapon against your family!!! Look it is your decision, they have to be happy for you! Your a whole family now!!! Congratulations...they'll come around but you have to give them a chance to act the right way!

  16. i dont understand why they would be mad. who cares if they are anyways they will get over it

  17. I think you are just making up stories.  There are so many red flags here.  It is very rare to adopt twins, and two unmarried people cannot adopt together.  It is even rare for one single to adopt.  No one who had to go through the adoption process would ever try to keep it from anyone.  You wouldn't even pass the homestudy if you were as immature as you seem to be.  And judging by your grammer and manner of speaking, you aren't even engaged.  Nice try, but you're full of c**p.  Please go to some other board to troll.  Don't do it here.

  18. I think you need to be really straight forward about it, because if you lie any more and they find out, it will be worse. but this was your decision as a couple, not theirs, don't worry about what your family will think or say too much.

  19. Ashley, I think your like twelve right? You have a great imagination. I hope those imaginary twins aren't keeping you up too late...now go do your homework!

  20. maybe have a dinner or make announcements and most of all show them that you can love them and take care of them. show that its about the babies and not about you and him. if anyone says anything, tell them that they needed love and someone to give them a secure home and hopefully your family will support you and love them like they are your own

  21. ummm how did you do this without them knowing.  this ought to be great considering you're on a bad path of decieving.

  22. you should have waited until you got married. are you even engaged..? because if you are your question should read my fiancee not bf...!

  23. You need to do what is best for your family (husband you children), but for your extended family. I find it hard to believe that you two adopted twins, as you can not adopt as a couple, unless you are married.

  24. You've already done it, so there's nothing they can say now. And if they're mad, oh well!

  25. Well first of all you already adopted them so it doesn't matter what happens now. The only thing thaou can do is explain to them the situation and why you adopted. If they are upset by this then that's their problem. If you and your boyfriend love each other and believe that you can take care of your new son/daughter then that is all that matters. If they are really your family then they will still love you no matter what.

  26. do you have the twins yet, or did the adoption just go through?

    if you've gone through the process to adopt, and qualified, and adopted twins, then the system has decided that you are capable parents - and your family has no reason to think otherwise.

    tell your family that if they want to be involved in your lives, then they have to be happy for you and accept your kids as their relatives - otherwise they will be cut off from you. family is supposed to be supportive.

  27. How did you pass the adoption screening when you're families weren't questioned?  The adoption process is long and hard and not something you can just sneak over to Reno to do on a whim.

    I don't think you're telling the truth.

    If you are, then first thing you'd better get some counseling because you have issues if you can't tell your families you've secretly adopted twins.

  28. You've been deemed mature enough to adopt yet you aren't mature enough to tell your families "nuts to you lot, it's our choice"? Wow.... where do you live?

    Here's what I'd do. Tell them, then tell them to get over it and be apart of your new family's life or be bitter and angry at you and have no part in it. You've chosen to adopt children, you shouldn't make those children face a resentful bunch of your relatives growing up. Might sound harsh and tough to do, but that is the best thing for your new children.

    Best of luck to you, your future husband, and your children.

    *mutters* Who the heck in this world is 'against' adoption anyways .... ?

  29. wow , congrats thats great ... As for telling everyone , just say you and your bf wanted these babies and thats that....there is nothing they can say now....Just love them babies and as soon as the familys see them they will also love them....take care and good luck

  30. Grow up.  It's your life now and not your parents.  If they want to see you and the grandchildren, they'll cope.

  31. While adoption may take some time, how long did it take you to adopt them? how old are you? you need to be at least a certain age to adopt and qualify in income?

    Both your families have no right as to what your decitions are. But you should of told them before you adopted or as soon as possible, Apparently you dont visit family as often anyways since you have already adopted and they have no idea. I hope you are both happy with your decition if it is infact true.

    Well, Your question about your sister having twins* what can I say now your question is even harder to believe, or you went off in adopting twins so your sister wouldnt have all the glory, By the way I would like daniel and daniela for twins name!

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